The Road to Forgiveness
by jezzeria
Summary: Bella just found out she's pregnant after a one night stand. Edward is enthralled by this woman who is carrying his child, but Bella has a dark past. Will she be able to let it go and give Edward the chance he deserves? AH
1. Prologue

Firstly I love my beta, InkStainedFire. She rocks my socks and strokes my ego so I don't turn tail and run. Lol this story is totally different for me. I hope you all enjoy it!

SM owns all, including me.

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BPOV

I woke up suddenly as the bile rose to my throat. I rushed to the bathroom, and for the third time that week emptied the contents of my stomach into the porcelain basin below me. I wondered briefly if I had some sort of stomach flu, and tried to ignore the unopened box of tampons on my counter that seemed to be staring me down. Beside it was another unopened box that I didn't want to acknowledge.

Rinsing my mouth, I splashed water across my face, trying to calm the gurgling that was returning to my stomach. Taking deep breaths I glanced around the room, noting just how dirty my bathtub was. I tasted metallic on my tongue and tried to zone in on every possible spot that would need my cleaning attention, but to no avail. The vomit rose again, as I clutched the bowl, praying the sickness wouldn't last as long as yesterday.

After I was fairly sure that my stomach was entirely empty, I slowly rose from the floor, staring at the forbidden box. The pregnancy test seemed to be teasing me even more than my tampon box as I hastily removed the stick from its package. I said a silent prayer to the God I didn't believe in.

"Fuck don't let this be positive." I muttered as I attempted to pee on the stick without peeing on my hand as well.

As soon as I had actually hit the stick I jammed the cap on the end and threw it on the counter as if it were burning my hand. I quickly washed my hands before dropping my head in my hands, trying to figure out how I had ended up worrying that I could be…I couldn't even bring myself to think the word.

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Two months ago I had gone out, not something I tended to do often, but it was a special occasion. It had been exactly two years since I had left my previous relationship. Now I know not everybody celebrates the day they break up, but considering my previous relationship was possibly the worst out there it was a day to remember for the rest of my life.

I had ended up in a tiny bar, and all I could think was that I just wanted a drink because I was so damn happy to be free. I sat down on a stool near the back, and ordered my drink. I sipped it slowly, watching as people slowly filtered in, and it felt so good to be able to sit by myself. To not have somebody constantly hovering over me, and just having the ability to be.

A few hours later, and a few drinks in, I realized I was feeling a bit tipsy. I nearly slipped off my stool, than giggling like a moron I made my way to the bathroom. When I returned, he was in my seat.

Feeling braver than usual I sauntered up to him, slightly red as I tapped him briskly on the shoulder. "You're in my seat," I claimed, as he turned to me with an amused expression.

"Oh sorry, didn't see you sitting here," he said jokingly, and I blushed, as my face spread into a smile. He moved to the stool next to mine, and then turned to look at me. It wasn't until then that I got a real good look at him, and I wasn't sure if it was the alcohol or my actual vision but he looked better than Brad Pitt, Tom Cruise, and Robert Pattinson combined.

His eyes sparkled like emeralds, and his skin was lightly bronzed. I couldn't help but notice the single dimple in the right corner of his smile, or his full lips that almost seemed to be calling to me. Yep, it must've been the alcohol, lips themselves just DO NOT call to people.

"So what's the occasion?" He asked, and I furrowed my brow in confusion; how did he know? "Well," he continued, "Not many people come out on a Wednesday night unless they're drunks, depressed, or celebrating something, and I've never seen you before, and you don't seem to look down to me so you must be celebrating something."

Oh.

"Oh, it's silly really, just celebrating the end of a relationship." He laughed at me then, the sound of his voice reverberating off of the walls of my mind. I looked down at the bar than, blushing madly, trying not to drool at this god of a man.

"Not many people celebrate the end of relationships," he commented, his eyes twinkling in amusement at me now.

"Well not many people were in the relationship I was in either," I countered, not really wanting to tell this man my whole life story. Besides, I was trying to celebrate the end not relive the experience. He seemed to sense that because he didn't prod any further.

We fell into an awkward silence than, and he turned towards the bar tender to order another drink, I assumed our conversation was over then and I turned my attention back to my own drink.

"Edward," he said a few moments later, startling me out of my train of thought.

"What?" I asked, still feeling the effects of my previous drinks.

"I'm Edward," he repeated.

"I'm Bella," I smiled warmly at him then.

He smiled back before I teasingly added, "So you must be a drunk then."

"Huh?" he asked, thoroughly confused.

"Well, you said the only ones that come out on a Wednesday are drunks, the depressed, and those who are celebrating. You don't look down, and you said you've never seen me here before meaning you're a regular, so you must be a drunk." His laughter rang through my ears again, as I smiled proudly at myself for not choking up enough to not talk to him silently thanking the alcohol god for my sudden courage.

We began talking then, laughing and joking around with one another as if we were old friends. Somehow we ended up back at his apartment. I wished I could feel guilty for my one night stand, but I couldn't feel guilty about the best night of my life. I had awoken the next morning, highly embarrassed that I had gone to bed with this man after only a few hours and I didn't even know his last name. I left before he could wake up, and I was grateful for the clean break, avoiding any awkwardness.

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The timer dinged suddenly, causing me to jump, bumping my elbow against the counter's edge. I groaned, and I knew that would be another bruise. God you're so clumsy Bella, I thought as I picked up the pee stick. Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, I thought, afraid to look down at it, already knowing the answer. You don't know that you're…you know. Just fucking look and get it over with already! It could just be nothing. It's probably just nerves. I sighed holding the stick up as I held my breath.

Fuck, it was positive.


	2. Babies and Nightmares

I'm trying to work on longer chapters as well as giving you quality, so bear with me if it takes a week or so in between updates.

I have the best beta ever

SM owns all

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EPOV

The sound of my alarm clock woke me, and I glanced up at it quickly: 5:55. I growled as I fumbled in the dark, trying to shut the damn thing up. I sat up, running my hands through my hair. I had dreamt about her again; her dark hair cascading down her pale skin, those luscious lips, and those gorgeous brown eyes. I groaned again, realizing my morning wood had grown impossibly harder.

It had been months since I had last seen Bella. After an amazing night together she had snuck off in the early hours of the morning. I wondered then if maybe it wasn't as amazing for her as it was for me, just the thought caused me to frown. She had seemed so in to me, and I really hadn't planned on it just being a one night stand. I wanted to take her out, get to know her, but when I woke to no one those hopes were quickly dashed. She hadn't even left me a way to contact her; I didn't even know her last name.

I hopped in the shower, trying to rid my thoughts of my dreams the night before. I could never function properly thinking about Bella naked in my bed, willing to do anything I asked of her. I sighed; thinking about this was not going to help.

It was 6:30 now and I quickly grabbed a cup of coffee from my automatic coffee pot before switching on the morning news. Unconsciously my mind wandered back to Bella, wondering how I might be able to find her.

I was forced out of my thoughts when there was a soft knock on my door. Oh shit, I wasn't late on my rent again was I? No, I glanced down at the receipt on the table by the door, I had paid my rent. I opened the door halfway, my eyes nearly popping out of my head as Bella stared back at me, fear in her eyes.

"Bella, what are you doing here?! I didn't think I would ever see you again," I realized I probably sounded more desperate than I had intended.

"Can I come in?" she asked wringing her hands as I gaped at her from inside.

"Oh, of course!!! Sorry, come on in, I don't know what happened to my manners," I babbled, stepping aside as she walked in timidly beside me.

"Go ahead, sit down, can I get you anything to eat or drink?"

She shook her head as she looked around my apartment. Oh crap. This place was a mess, I had completely forgotten in all the excitement of seeing her on my doorstep.

"Sorry about the mess," I apologized, blushing slightly.

"No, it's homey," she said taking a deep breath, "I really need to talk to you."

"Okay, shoot," I said nonchalantly, trying to act as though I hadn't been hanging on every breath she had taken since walking through my door.

"Edward," she was staring at the floor, and I wished she would look up at me so I could memorize every line and shape of her face, "I'm pregnant."

I couldn't help the smile that spread to my face, as she continued to stare at the dust on my floor.

"Are you positive?" I asked, not nearly as upset as I thought I would feel if a woman told me she was pregnant. Then again I had never thought I could feel so attached to someone I barely knew like I now felt towards Bella.

"Well, that's what the test said," she joked, looking up at me then with worry in her eyes, "I go to the doctor tomorrow…you can come if you want," she looked at me nervously before quickly adding, "or you don't have to."

"Of course I want to go, that could be my child in there!" I exclaimed, trying to lighten the mood.

"It is your child," she said, flinching slightly as if I was indicating there could be another possible candidate for daddy.

"That's not what I meant…" I trailed off, and she seemed to nod her head in understanding.

We stood there for a few moments in silence. I was staring at the girl that had starred in my dreams since the first night I saw her, and now I was at a loss for words for what to say.

"Are you sure you don't want to sit down?" I asked again, hoping she would say yes and would sit on my couch, leaving her scent in that spot.

"No, I have to get going," she said quickly, before walking briskly out the door. Oh no, she was leaving again and I still knew no more about her than that first night except that she was carrying my child.

"WAIT," I screamed out the door, as she turned towards me. I wanted to tell her to stay, that I would take care of her for the rest of her life. I wanted her to come back into my apartment so I could ravish her before cooking her a big breakfast, but instead I just stared at her as she stared back in anticipation. "I don't know how to get a hold of you…so I can go with you tomorrow to the doctors."

She blinked twice at me as if she expected a different reaction from me, "Oh right," she stammered, walking towards me pulling out her card, "my cell's on there, just give me a call. The appointment's at 10." Once again she turned and walked away, but this time I had no reason to call her back, so instead I stared down at the card in my hand. My angel had a name, Isabella Swan.

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BPOV

I reached my car before breaking down. It had been so hard going there to see Edward, and he had looked so happy to see me. I wished I wasn't plagued by my past then. Maybe the old Bella would've walked in and accepted his invite to sit down. Maybe I would've at least learned a little more about the man that was the father of my child, instead of running out of there like a scared chicken.

I closed my eyes, images of Chris began popping up, and I remembered when I had told him I was pregnant with his child. It was two and a half years ago, he too had seemed so happy that I was going to have his child. I remember feeling so pleased that he finally seemed happy with me. I opened my eyes suddenly, not wanting the images to go where I knew they would as tears spilled down my face. I didn't want to remember losing my first child before he could even be born.

I sighed, starting the car. Of course Edward and my relationship would be nothing like my relationship with Chris. For starters I didn't even know the man. Secondly, nobody could be as bad as Chris. And finally, I could not give Edward the chance to hurt me the way I had been hurt before.

My stomach growled in distaste, pressing me to find the nearest food as I tried to think of Edward's happy green eyes staring at me all morning.

"Okay, okay," I murmured as my stomach growled again, but I couldn't help the smile that was crossing my face as I wondered what our child would look like. Maybe he would have Edward's eyes, or that little dimple; I wondered if his hair would be my color or the sandy gorgeous color of Edwards.

After grabbing a quick bit of food I was headed back to my car, still going over the possibilities of what my child would be like and I nearly screamed when my phone went off. I checked the caller ID but didn't recognize the number.

"Hello?" My voice nearly faltered, as I prayed it wasn't Chris on the other end…he couldn't have found me could he?

"Hey Bella, it's me, Edward," I breathed a huge sigh of relief, and he chuckled, not fully realizing how panicked I had truly felt just a moment ago before questioning me, "trying to avoid someone?"

"Just afraid my past had caught up to me," I told him honestly, but not going into too much detail. I didn't want to scare him away just yet.

"Hey, so sorry I was kind of taken aback by you showing up earlier, you wanna grab a bite to eat or something later?" he sounded nervous, the thought that he was nervous talking to me made me blush.

"Sure," my mouth spoke without my permission, but I was more surprised that I didn't regret it. I truly wanted to see Edward.

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EPOV

I hung up the phone and the knots began to form in my stomach. What would we talk about? What if I scare her off? I began rummaging through my closet trying to find something to wear. Great, on top of everything else I was turning into a girl too worried about my wardrobe and my hair. Oh shit, my hair! It's always a mess, would she like my hair messy or should I try to look more clean cut? Nerves and doubt fluttered through my mind, in two hours I would be sitting across from Bella, and I wanted everything to be perfect.

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I was standing outside the restaurant wondering if she was already there. I wish she would've let me pick her up; I felt like a huge douche bag meeting her instead of treating her properly. Maybe she was ashamed of where she lived, or maybe she just didn't want me to know where she lived. 'Of course she doesn't want you to know where she lives', my subconscious screamed at me, 'you're a stranger! And she told you the first night she met you her last relationship was bad.'

I began to wonder what her last relationship had been like and if it really was bad enough to be celebrating the end of it. What could that guy have done to hurt Bella? My mind began to play through scenarios as I stood with my hand on the door.

"Edward?" a tiny voice questioned from behind me, causing me to jump. There stood Bella, staring at me, probably wondering why the hell I was staring at the door.

"Shall we?" I asked, as I placed my hand on the small of her back as I opened the door, ushering her inside.

The hostess asked if we would prefer a booth or a table, and Bella looked at me with inquiring eyes, as if she didn't want to make the wrong decision. I smiled at her, encouraging her to choose, I only wanted her to be comfortable. She said booth slowly as she looked at me, but I only nodded in agreement.

We sat down as the waiter brought us two glasses of water. I wanted to break this tension with Bella; I didn't want her to feel so uncomfortable with me.

"So," I questioned, "what is it you do exactly?"

Her face lit up, it was obviously something she loved as she told me she was a freelance photographer. She started going into details about why she never settled down as a commercial photographer, stating that she didn't want any limitations on her creativity. She than told me she had been offered a job at the local community college, teaching classes on photography and she gushed about how much she thought she would enjoy that. I loved the look this topic had put on her face, and I reminded myself to talk to her about every aspect of this in the future.

Her speech began getting more animated, and suddenly I felt a splash of cold water across my leg as ice cubes and liquid skid across the table. I jumped up in the surprise at the sudden temperature change, and began dabbing my leg with a napkin. I looked up at Bella and just like that the smile was gone. In fact her whole face looked frozen in terror, and when she saw me looking at her in confusion she blanched. It almost looked like she was scared of me. A smile spread across my face, trying to show her it was okay, but she was visibly shaking now.

"Bella," I whispered, as I reached my hand across the table touching her own hand that was ice cold, "are you okay?"

She only nodded, as I noticed tears begin to fill her eyes before she quickly excused herself to go to the restroom. What the hell was that about?

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BPOV

I splashed the cold water on my face, trying to calm my heart rate back to normal. I didn't want to react that way, I wasn't afraid of Edward, but as soon as the water hit his lap all I could see was Chris's face, and what he would've done to me if that were him. I had panicked. Oh God, Edward would probably think I was insane now. I groaned into my hands as I rested my elbows on the sink.

I had to explain to him. That was the only way to justify my reaction without completely scaring him off. I felt my stomach begin to turn at the thought, and ran to the basin just in time to purge my lunch from a few hours ago.

'Sorry little one,' I thought, as I tried to calm my nerves, willing myself not to puke again; willing my body to keep as much nutrients as possible for my child. Just because the thoughts made me sick didn't mean I had to make my child suffer as well. I quickly rinsed my mouth out with water, splashing more water on my face. You can do this, I told myself, pushing open the door as I headed back to my table.

Edward looked up at my approach, and gave me a genuine smile, which immediately calmed any nerves that were left in my stomach. His eyes bore into me, _are you all right?_ they seemed to ask, but I only smiled back in response as I sat down, staring at my hands folded in my lap.

"Sorry about that," I whispered, unsure if my voice was going to fail me or not, wondering how I was going to approach the subject.

"Bella what happened?" he asked, and I was about to answer him when he held up, "what happened in your last relationship?" I stared, gaping at him; okay, so he realized this may have something to do with my previous relationship.

I licked my lips, trying to think of the best way to answer him, "Well," I began, "like I told you the night we met, my last relationship was…bad. No, it was beyond bad." God I was regretting starting this conversation already, despite the fact that it had been years, everything was still too fresh in my mind, and I glanced over my shoulder once, afraid to see Chris lurking somewhere in the shadows. I leaned towards Edward, my voice barely a whisper as I continued, "if that had happened with Chris," I looked behind me again, sure that someone was out there waiting for me, "he would've drug me out of this restaurant by my hair for my insolence."

I began to wring my hands under the table as Edward stared at me in awe. I couldn't stop my feeling of paranoia as I continued to glance around the restaurant every few seconds, still unconvinced that Chris wasn't about to pop out of the shadows at any moment and drag me home regardless.

"Bella, I'm so sorry," he seemed to be at a loss for words, as I licked my lips again and took one last survey of our surroundings. He seemed to notice this time as he too looked around before leaning in even closer to me, and now I could feel his breath on my face, "I would never let anything happen to you."

Crap, now he was feeling sorry for me, I tried to laugh, but instead it sounded like I was choking, so I cleared my throat before adding, "And that would've been on a good day." I had been trying to lighten the mood, but realized that my statement had only made it sound worse. I internally kicked myself, but my subconscious seemed to be screaming at me, telling me that what I had just said had only been truth. I smiled up at Edward, trying to promise to myself I wouldn't let any more slips like that happen.

I couldn't risk Edward's safety.

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EPOV

The rest of the dinner continued on without a hitch, and I even got Bella to truly smile again. I was lost in every word that fell from her lips, and marveled at the way her eyes lit up on certain subjects. In the back of my mind, though, I couldn't erase the words that she had said: _that would've been on a good day_. What the hell had that guy exactly done to her? Dragging her out of a restaurant for spilling water, by her hair nonetheless was not what I would EVER consider a good day.

I also didn't fail to notice that she continued to look over her shoulder every few minutes, as if she expected someone to be there. Was she still expecting Chris to be there? To come to drag her back with him? The thought immediately made my entire body tense, as I too began scanning the restaurant. Not that I would've known him if I saw him. All I could think was that I wanted –no- NEEDED to make Bella not only feel safe again, but actually make her safe again.

As I was walking Bella to her car I couldn't help but feel that she just could not leave my side. I couldn't allow it. I knew she was still frightened because she had walked nearly on top of me and also shied away from every shadow.

"Bella," I began, and she looked up at me, fear and disappointment filling her eyes, but I didn't continue with the cliché: I had a nice time tonight. "Stay the night with me," her eyes widened, and I realized how entirely inappropriate it sounded as soon as the words left my lips, "please, I notice how frightened you look. I'll sleep on the couch. Just please, I need to know for sure that you're safe tonight."

I watched as she internally battled with herself, but reluctantly she gave in. I almost felt lightheaded at the thought; she trusts me. I vowed to myself then, I would not take her trust lightly, and if she wanted to take it back tomorrow morning then I would rightfully give it to her, and try to earn it from her over and over if I had to.

We decided to take my car, leaving hers behind after safely locking it. She rested her head against the back of the seat, and I could tell by the slowing of her breathing she was beginning to fall asleep. I felt stupid then, of course she must be exhausted, she was carrying a child! My resolve to keep this woman with me as long as I could only strengthened, not only did I want to keep Bella safe but I felt a new emotion begin to rise in me. That was my child, and I had to make sure he or she was safe ALWAYS, no questions asked.

I looked over at Bella then, wanting to reach down and touch her stomach. I knew it was too soon to feel anything, but I couldn't help it. My touch was gentle, I didn't want to wake Bella, and I definitely didn't want to scare her with the fact that I was touching her. Her hands reached down and grasped mine tightly, and I held my breath fearing she had woken up after all. I waited, but could only hear her soft breathing as I realized she was still asleep. I sighed, enjoying the feel of her warm hands holding mine against our child.

It only took a few more minutes until I was parked, but I couldn't break this perfect moment, not yet. I stared at Bella for god knows how long, hoping that someday she would show me this affection consciously. I tried to push the thoughts away, reminding myself I needed to take things one day at a time as I opened her door, gently lifting her from the seat.

Gently I laid her down in my bed, pulling the shoes from her feet. I tucked her in, and couldn't resist the overwhelming urge to kiss her forehead before turning off the light, and heading out to the couch.

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BPOV

_I could recall telling Chris that I was pregnant with his child. He beamed at me, and for once I felt that he was truly happy with me and that he was returning the love I felt for him. He came with me to every doctor's appointment, and hung up every ultrasound on the fridge, vowing that we would someday put these in an album. Everything felt like it was finally falling into place, and I couldn't help but delight in the fact that I had gone through all these hardships and it had finally paid off._

_I should've known it wouldn't last._

_I could see Chris's face when I got home that afternoon. His eyes seemed to focus on nothing as he stared through me, and I panicked, wondering if he was using again. The door closed, alerting him that I was there as his eyes suddenly snapped up to meet mine._

"_Where the fuck have you been?!" he screamed in my face as I backed into the wall, holding my stomach, trying to shield my precious angel from the noise._

_Chris seemed to notice my movements as his eyes suddenly moved down to my stomach. My eyes widened in horror as I saw the look of utter disgust pass his face at the sight of my protruding belly. He had to be using again._

"_FUCKING WHORE!" he screamed, charging towards me. I ripped the door open suddenly running out of our apartment. He was chasing after me, but all I could think was that I had to get out of there. Had to save my baby. I reached the top of the stairs when I felt his hand on my wrist as he spun me around, slamming me into the wall._

"_WHO'S IS IT?!" he questioned, his rancid breath filling my nose. _

"_Yours," I squeaked, praying that he would remember the last 8 months._

"_LIAR!" his voice made my whole body shake, and I feared what he would do, he was so unstable when he was high. "You fucking KNOW I can NOT have children!"_

"_I swear it's yours," I cried in desperation._

_I ripped my arm from him, in an attempt to get away, but he was prepared for me to fight back as he grabbed my other arm, whirling us back towards the stairs. I whimpered in fear, and suddenly hated myself for showing him my fear. He would just use it against me._

"_You WILL give it up after that little bastard is born," he demanded, his nose only inches from my face._

"_NO!" I yelled, unintentionally. I could not give up this part of me; I could not let my child be taken by strangers._

_He pulled me closer than, his hot breath on my ear, "I knew I should've killed you when I had the chance," he whispered, before shoving me slightly, and letting go of my wrists._

_I nearly smiled thinking I was free, but only to find a second later that I had been teetering on the edge of the stairs._

I woke up with a start, vaguely aware that I had actually begun to scream out loud. Sobs wracked my body as I covered my face in my hands. I tried not to remember, I wanted so badly to forget. It seemed like hours before my breathing was back to normal, and I began to take in my surroundings. Where the hell was I? Suddenly like a flood, memories from that night came rushing back. Meeting Edward for dinner, spilling water on him, Edward nearly begging me to stay at his house tonight. Edward. That meant he was here in the same apartment. I slowly got up, opening the door as quietly as I could. After my dream I felt like I was sneaking out, about to get caught at any moment.

A tiny light shone through the front window and I could just barely make out the shape of Edwards body.

"Edward," I whispered, so softly I could barely hear my own voice. I took a deep breath, trying to tell myself that he wouldn't be mad if I woke him. I shouldn't be afraid of him.

"Edward," I said a little louder, but still nothing. Oh God, my mind silently begged, please wake up.

I nudged his shoulder this time as I said his name, stepping back quickly. His eyes opened slowly as he stared up at me. He jumped slightly, and I realized I probably scared the crap out of him since I hadn't even bothered to turn on a light.

"Bella," he mumbled groggily, "are you alright?" I wanted to be able to tell him yes, but instead tears flooded my eyes instantly as I recalled my dream, as I shook my head vehemently.

"I had a bad dream," I whispered, noting how child like I sounded. Edward flipped on the lamp on the table beside him as he squinted up at me.

"Do you want to talk about it?" I shook my head, tears falling freely now as I stared at the floor.

"Will you hold me?" Edward stood up than, grabbing me in a warm embrace as he led us back to his room. He lay on the covers, while I was underneath. I nearly asked him to get closer to me, desiring the contact, but I knew he was being a gentleman and I didn't know if such an intimate touch would set me off anymore. I lay with my head on his chest, and slowly began to doze off again. I wasn't sure if I was dreaming or not, but I could've sworn I heard him whisper, "I'll always make you safe," before finally falling into a peaceful sleep.


	3. The Boogeyman's Coming

So someone said they thought Edward might be too accepting and things might be going to fast. In response I say...we're only two chapters in...read on! :)

I love you all + my Beta.

SM owns the world.

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BPOV

I awoke early that morning, prying myself from Edwards's arms as I hurtled towards the bathroom. I hoped Edward wouldn't wake to the sound of me getting sick. It was bad enough I was mere feet away from him vomiting in his bathroom; I didn't need him awake to witness this too. I especially didn't need the sympathy and comfort he would surely try to give me.

I rose slowly from the tile, the feeling of fatigue hit me instantly. My little night terror had not gone unnoticed by my body. Staring at myself in the mirror I noticed how shallow and sullen I looked, and only after missing a few hours of sleep. I cringed at the acidic taste in my mouth, wishing I had a tooth brush.

Knowing the calm in my stomach wouldn't last for long I decided it was better off if I didn't brush my teeth; besides I had recently discovered the taste of tooth paste made me vomit. Instead I leaned against the door frame staring at Edward. His lips were pouted and there was a crease in his brow. My heart jumped as I stared at him, causing me to quickly look away. Staying here last night had been a bad idea. I contemplated leaving again before he awoke before I was reminded that I had left my car at the restaurant last night. There was no way I could walk all the way there, it was nearly 7 miles away. Maybe I would have enough for a cab.

That thought was quickly dashed as I felt my last meal ready to make its appearance. I spun around, knocking into the counter I felt a sharp stab but pushed it aside as I groped for the toilet. The ache in my side was only intensified by the rejection my body was giving to the food. God the noises coming out of me sounded horrible, _please Edward don't wake u__p_. I couldn't think of anything else as my body purged every last ounce of food or liquid from my body. I cringed when I felt someone rubbing small circles on my back.

"Go away," I moaned, before another wave of sickness took over. He didn't need to see me like this. Why was I trying to impress him right now? _No_, I told myself, _you are just trying to spare him having to watch this grotesque scene unfold._

"I can't just leave you like this," he whispered, causing butterflies in my stomach, which in my current condition only made me feel worse.

"Can't a pregnant lady just puke in peace?" I gasped out trying to catch my breath.

I heard Edward sigh beside me, but thankfully I heard him close the door behind him a few moments later. Immediately I felt guilty for pushing him away. He had only been trying to help. Finally I felt that the wave of sickness had passed. I cupped water in my hands, rinsing my mouth and splashing my face. It was time to face the music and start my day.

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EPOV

A loud noise startled me awake, and I glanced down noticing Bella was no longer beside me. 'Not again,' I internally groaned, wishing I had been holding her tighter. Suddenly I heard a noise in the bathroom, and rushed inside to make sure everything was alright. I felt like I was intruding, but couldn't bring myself to leave her side as she experienced wave after wave of sickness. Finally she seemed to notice my presence as I gently rubbed her back. She begged me to leave, and I finally complied figuring I could make us breakfast instead.

The smell of coffee began to fill the room as I stared into the fridge wondering what Bella liked to eat. Surely she would want to eat after all of that. I started cooking some eggs when she walked out.

"Hungry?" I smiled at her, as a look of distaste crossed her face.

"Oh God, no food please," she groaned before gently resting her cheek on the cool counter. Her face looked pale, and I could tell she was exhausted.

"Is there anything else I can get you?" I asked, feeling as if I should be doing something. She only shook her head. Putting the eggs on a plate, I turned away from her and began to wash dishes. I couldn't understand why I was so drawn to her. Everything she did inspired me to touch her, but I knew I couldn't. "Do you need me to take you by your place before the doctor's appointment?" Her head shot up suddenly.

"Yes, that would be amazing. These clothes are almost as disgusting as I feel." I smiled; glad that she could joke around even after such a hard night and rough morning.

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Despite the fact that she didn't have a change of clothes, it still took her an hour before she was ready to head to her apartment. I ended up dropping her off at her car and followed her over to her place. I took notice that it wasn't in the safest of neighborhoods and the realization made me frown. We stepped over her drunken neighbor to get to her door, Bella shooting apologies at me with her eyes.

By 9:30 we were on the road heading to the hospital. Bella turned to me then, looking much better after her shower and I could tell she was getting ready to interrogate me.

"So I talked about myself last night, what do you do exactly?"

"I'm an architect, it's boring stuff really," I tried to shy away from the question, but she looked at me confused, "what?"

"Well just…that's such a prominent job and you live in a…" her sentence cut off, and I could tell she was trying not to offend me, but I just laughed.

"An apartment? Yea I know. Just because I live there doesn't mean I'm poor, I just don't see the point in buying a house. I mean come on; it'd just be me and some stuffy house. I feel closer to people in an apartment." She looked away thoughtfully, and I bit my cheek before quickly adding, "Of course I could find a reason to buy a house now…for the baby of course."

Her cheeks flushed a gorgeous crimson and I marveled at the way it accented her face as I wondered if it was a good blush or a bad blush.

"So what's it like being an architect?"

"Well, most of the time you get investors who want clone buildings: ya know buildings that look like all the other ones you see in every other city," I chuckled, running my hands through my hair, "but every once in a while we get the ones who want something innovative, and then it's great. You get to be part of something new and original and there are no boundaries. Now those are my favorite to be contracted for."

I glanced sideways at her and notice a smile on her lips, "What?" I asked, as she turned towards me her smile growing larger.

"Nothing," she said, "you just sound like me when I talk about my pictures." I smiled, looking ahead as I realized I did, goofy smile and all. I truly love my work.

Before I knew it we were turning into the parking lot, and I walked around the car opening the door for her. I followed her into the tiny building, and scoffed at the conditions it looked like it was in. Maybe if Bella couldn't pay for a good doctor she would allow me to, I would have to talk to her about it later.

The receptionist effectively ignored us for five minutes before I cleared my throat, trying to announce that we weren't going anywhere. She looked up annoyed at the interruption, and I cringed at her nasal voice.

"May I help you?" she squawked, placing both hands on either side of her hips.

"I have an appointment," Bella said timidly refusing to meet the woman's gaze.

"Name?"

"It should be under Chloe, Chloe Bella," I turned to her suddenly, had I had her name wrong all along? She turned to me than with pleading eyes, signaling that she would explain to me later. I smiled weakly at her, shrugging my shoulders slightly. The receptionist than told us to take a seat, to which Bella turned to me.

"I have to give a fake name," she whispered so softly I had to strain to hear, "Chris is still constantly checking for me, I can't slip up, even at the doctor's."

"But you told me your real name, or did I get another fake name?" I hadn't intended to sound so upset, it was up to her if she wanted to tell me the truth about anything, but I desperately wanted her to trust me.

"Yes, I told you my real name," she sighed, seeming upset, and I immediately felt guilty for causing her stress, "nobody knows me by that name but you…honestly I don't know why I gave you my actual name. When we first met it was fine because you just knew my first name, but when I saw you yesterday I just felt like…." she glanced around, afraid of the demons chasing her again before leaning even closer to me, her voice on my ear causing me tingles, "I just felt like I had to. I trust you." She pulled back quickly, staring at the floor.

I leaned over to her then, "Good, because I want you to know you can always trust me. No matter what." She let out a relieved sigh as she smiled sideways at me.

A nurse stepped out, calling us back and Bella stood up, frowning as she leaned back to say one last thing to me, "You know it would be better if you stayed away from me," and with that she turned and walked towards the door, a new smile in place as I followed dumbfounded after her.

--------------------------------

"See that there," the doctor pointed to a mass at the screen, and I squinted trying to make out something that would actually look like…well something. Bella beamed though nodding her head vigorously; at least she knew what the hell she was looking at. The doctor looked at me noticing the look of confusion and concentration on my face.

"It doesn't look like much now, but that's your baby." I frowned; my baby looked like an alien blob. "Oh and that," the doctor continued on, "that's the heartbeat. Congratulations!" The doctor then told us he was going to go make a print of the ultrasound, before leaving the room. I continued to look at the screen, trying to make out any features that would make that thing a human.

"Edward," Bella placed her hand on my shoulder, "you okay?"

I looked at her than, "Bella, I don't know how to tell you this, but our child looks like a bean." She laughed than, and I took in just how happy she looked. If I had thought I wanted to keep the smile from last night forever, than it was obvious I had never seen this smile before. Bella was radiating happiness and beauty. Note to self: talk about our baby ALL THE TIME. We both continued to look at the screen.

"I hope he looks like you," she confessed, "you have the most beautiful green eyes, and that adorable dimple," I looked at her surprised as she tried to turn her burning face away. She was embarrassed for admitting she was attracted to me but, she was attracted to me! I decided I shouldn't let it go to my head, instead I figured I would show her just how attracted I was to her as well.

"Nah, the kid would do better off with yours. Those chocolate brown eyes and that drop dead smile. Nobody will be able to tell him no." If I had thought Bella couldn't get any more red my current compliment had just proved that wrong. I couldn't help but think how beautiful the color was on her, and thought they should name that color after her. We made small talk after that about nothing important, as we both refused to look at one another instead staring at the screen.

In the silence my mind swam with images of Bella and our child, laughing and playing together. I had never seen anything more perfect.

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BPOV

"You can stay again tonight if you'd like," Edward offered, but I knew I needed to brave this out on my own. I couldn't get too reliant on him. I didn't even want to get close to him.

"No, I'm fine," I replied, as I hastily unbuckled my seat belt my hand on the door. I stopped before climbing out of the car, "here you can have this picture. I'll take the next one," I offered before shutting the door, cutting off any chance of Edward arguing with me.

I had to climb over my drunken neighbor again to get into my apartment, and blushed at the thought of Edward having seen where I live. It was nothing new to me, if my neighbor wasn't by my door passed out he was pounding on it, asking me if I had any money or booze. I glanced at the clock, noting how late it was before grabbing my camera and dashing off. I had a wedding to do.

Thankfully traffic was bearable, and I still managed to make it to my appointment half an hour early as I prepared to set up. Weddings were always my favorite and worst events. I loved seeing two people in love celebrating together. I loved the look on the grooms face as his future bride walked towards him. I hated the feeling of loneliness that accompanied watching two people solidify their lives together.

Today was no exception as I snapped photo after photo, except that today Edward kept popping into my mind. When the groom reached up to wipe away the tear of his bride as she beamed back at him, I wondered if Edward would do that for me. When the couple cut the cake and the husband only slightly smeared cake on his wife's face so as not to ruin her makeup, I wondered how Edward would feed me our wedding cake. By the time the first dance was being played I was internally kicking myself at letting all these thoughts of Edward consume my day. I could not think this way. I was not normal, and I could never have this for myself. I ducked out, after letting the bride and groom know I would get them their proofs right away.

It was dark out now, and I was glad my neighbor was nowhere to be seen or heard as I quickly unlocked my front door, flipping on a few lights. I put my gear down, as I walked to the kitchen to grab myself a glass of water. As I was filling the glass I got the feeling I was being watched and quickly spun around to find myself face to face with nothing. I sighed, laughing at myself for being so silly. Who would be here?

I leaned against the counter, sipping the water when I noted that things looked like they had been moved around in my apartment. That wasn't possible was it? Instantly my body tensed. I stood still, my eyes wide as I listened for any unusual sounds. There was nothing, but I still couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong. Grabbing a knife from the chopping block I slowly began to move through every room, checking every space for any signs of anything. I found nothing.

Walking into my bedroom, I placed the knife on my night stand before lying down. Maybe I just needed some sleep, after all I was exhausted.

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I awoke hours later to what sounded like a door being closed softly. I held my breath, grabbing hold of the knife, clutching it tightly to my chest as I stuck my head under the covers. Trying not to move, I could've sworn I saw my bedroom door open slightly before being closed again through a crack in the blanket. I distinctively heard the click, and my heart began hammering in my chest. _Shut up, shut up, shut up_, I demanded of the traitorous organ. Squeezing my eyes shut, I could swear I heard the sound of breathing only a few feet from my bed.

My body threatened to shut down as the panic began to set in. I felt a slight breeze on top of my head; it felt as if someone had just touched my hair. I wanted to scream, I wanted to jump up and stab the offender, but instead I clutched the knife to my chest even tighter, as I felt the circulation began to cut off in my fingers. The intruding touch continued down the shape of my body causing me to let out a tiny squeal. I quickly clapped one of my hands over my mouth, praying the intruder hadn't heard that. There was a soft chuckle, as the fingers twirled a piece of my hair in between them. I bit the inside of my hand, warning myself not to make any further noises.

Just as quickly I heard the door click again, and I waited, listening for the sound of the front door opening and closing. If it was a robber, they could have whatever they wanted_. But what if it's not?_ my mind whispered, a chill rushing through my body. I knew there was no way it was a robber. A robber wouldn't just come in a touch me like that. There was only one person who would sneak into my house and touch me. I wanted to rip every hair from my head; this just wasn't fair.

After what felt like an eternity I finally heard the front door open and close. Slowly I rose from my bed, unwilling to turn on a light. I continued to clutch the knife to my chest, as I stealthily opened my door. Everything seemed peaceful which unsettled me even more, so I ran.

Before even realizing what I was truly doing I had sprinted out the front door, and was in my car driving as fast as I could down the street. Every few seconds I glanced in the mirror, convinced someone would be following me. My mind suddenly flashed to horror movies, with the killer in the back seat, and I swerved to the side of the road, jumping out and inspecting every inch of my car for anyone. There was nothing, but I realized than I was still holding the knife. I threw it on the floor of my passenger seat before speeding off again.

I drove around for hours to afraid to go home, but I knew I couldn't drive forever as my eyes kept threatening to close on me. I wasn't sure where I was going to go until I came to the parking lot. I knew I shouldn't be here, but I threw my car into park as I quickly jumped out. I was going against everything I had ever promised myself, but I didn't care. I had to be in the one place I truly felt safe.

Edward answered on the third knock, and didn't even question my late night call or my crazed look as I stood before him in my pajamas without any shoes on. He stepped aside letting me in. I stood by the couch, facing Edward as he shut the door. He turned and pulled me to him embracing me. My muscles began to unclench feeling the strength of his hold on me. My heart rate began to slow as he ran his fingers under my eyes. It was then I realized I had been crying the entire time.

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Reviews are almost better than the safety of Edwards arms.


	4. Angela

**So I'm not sure if this will show up as an update, but if you're coming here like "chapter four wtf we're way past that" well I had do to a little revamping. I'll also probably be changing around a couple other chapters too thanks to something my beta over at twilighted pointed out to me. So feel free to re-read through this, there's only a small section towards the end that's been added in and changed.**

Sorry, I've had plans to update sooner but work came a calling, plus my slight writers block didn't help. But all of you have encouraged me and never cease to amaze me.

Someone reviewed and told me that Chris really messed up Bella. Yes. Yes he did, but what you have seen and will see in this chapter is not even the half of it. And I'm sorry for that, but trust me it was hard for this Bella to come forward to want this written and it was even harder to write, and for me to have to see as she continues on with this story.

This chapter may be a little intense. Hold on to your seats kids, I promise the next couple chapters after this won't be so heavy.

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BPOV

RUN BELLA RUN!

No. Please. Please. PLEASE. NO, ANGELA!

I gripped my pillow tighter as I was thrust awake as vicious images played behind my eyelids. My heart stopped as my pillow gripped me back. I pushed myself backwards, effectively falling off the bed as I stared wide eyed at a confused and worried Edward.

It was just Edward. Fuck.

I cradled my face in my hands as sobs began to escape my throat. I gripped my hair tightly trying to fight back the sickness that for once was not caused by the little blessing growing inside of me. Scenes played through my mind and I tried to force them back into their locked box, but last nights visit had unlocked that box and now in the daylight I was forced to face all of my demons.

Edward was on the floor beside me trying to calm me, but I didn't even notice him. I was only vaguely aware of how loud my sobs were now. I should've been disturbed that I was in the fetal position, rocking like an insane person, but I was too far gone to notice now.

Chris…the bright room…yelling…panic…Phil…crying…Phil was protecting me…I was too afraid…she was protecting me too…I had to stop this…he wouldn't listen, didn't notice I was there…he was so mad….so mad…and than angela…ANGELA!

I felt strands of my hair ripping from my scalp and only realized than I had been screaming for some time as well as my voice grew hoarse from the strain. I didn't deserve to be here, it should've been me. It wasn't fair, it just wasn't fair.

"BELLA!" Edwards roar causing my mouth to snap shut and I stilled instantly, waiting for the blow I deserved for this crazy outbreak. "Bella," Edward cooed more softly now, as he tried to pry my hands from my hair. They stayed in position as his hands rubbed down my arms and to my shoulders. Oh, so he wasn't going to hit me he was going to punish me in another way. This was something I had earned, and I needed to accept it in order to keep Edward.

I lowered my hands, his own still on my shoulders. I kept my eyes to the floor and his thumb lightly traced across my jaw and I shuddered. At least with this punishment I could try to enjoy it and imagine Edwards hands were on me because he actually desired me and not because of my outburst. I waited for Edward to make his next move before realizing he probably wanted me to do something. My thumbs hooked under my shirt and Edward's hands pulled back instantly.

"What are you doing?" his voice sounded shaky, maybe he felt sorry he had to do this. I felt slight hope thinking my punishment might be easier because of this.

"It's okay, I know you have to punish me, I'll help you," I whispered and I felt him stand quickly.

"Jesus Christ, Bella. I am not going to punish you! I was just trying to…you did nothing….FUCK, I need to go for a walk," he stated quickly before exiting the room. I heard the front door slam and cringed almost feeling the vibrations of his anger as the walls shook.

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EPOV

She thought I was going to rape her. She thought because she had a nightmare, and a panic attack that I was going to punish her. I had stormed out on her, probably just confirming for her that I was angry with her and she deserved to be punished. But I wasn't mad at her, I was mad at Chris. Or Angela. Or all of them. Whoever fucked up her life that bad.

It had been a few minutes when the front door opened timidly, but I didn't turn to it. Instead I looked out at nothing, listening to the sound of Bella breathing behind me. Knowing she would just take this as a sign that I was still angry at her, I turned to her suddenly, taking a deep drag from my cigarette as I eyed her. Her eyes were puffy and swollen but the redness only seemed to make her eyes glitter like gold. Her hair was a wild mess that nearly competed with mine. Thankfully there were no bald spots. She had been pulling so hard on her hair I was sure she had ripped nearly all of it out.

I exhaled slowly as I nodded my head, signaling her to come to me. She shuffled slightly to me, head down, she stopped, standing next to me her back to the railing. I turned around than leaning on cool metal as I took another drag. I peered at her from the corner of my eye and she too had faced front leaning against the railing. She was staring at me. Any other time and I would've smiled at her, she looked so damn cute next to me.

"I didn't know you smoke," she finally said as I exhaled turning my head to face her now.

"I don't," I said quizzically, and her eyes narrowed as she tried to decipher what I was saying. "I quit three years ago," I admitted, and she turned from me than sighing audibly.

"I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"I shouldn't have acted that way."

I scoffed staring at her than. "As if you could help it," she snorted at me but I placed my forefinger under her chin, urging her to look at me, "Bella, listen to me. You. Did. Nothing. Wrong." Her eyes gave her away that she doubted that but she smiled anyway.

"Okay."

We stood there in silence for a few more minutes. I argued with myself about touching her, and ended up wrapping my arm around her shoulders trying to prove to her that I was not mad at her. She seemed to relax at my touch, and we continued to stand there, neither one of us wanting to break the moment. I was the first to break the silence.

"Who's Angela," instantly her body tensed under my arm and I wondered what this girl could've done to upset Bella so much. This time the silence was awkward. I wished I hadn't brought up the subject, ruining such an imperfect perfect moment, so instead I didn't pursue my question, not wanting to pressure her.

"Lets go inside," I offered, ushering her back into my home.

Before long the smell of bacon and waffles wafted throughout the kitchen as Bella sat on a stool watching me cook. We still hadn't said a single word since the balcony.

Bella ate graciously and I was glad to get food in her stomach, knowing she was probably starving after this morning.

"My sister," Bella said suddenly, as I looked up at her from my own plate, "Angela, she was my sister."

My brow furrowed at this revelation, her sister had hurt her too? Man this was all so messed up, what did Bella do to deserve her family hurting her too?

"Renee is a drug addict, that's my mom, she met Chris when she was trying to score some ice. She fell for him instantly, and started bringing him around the house all the time. It was really fucked up. My step dad Phil traveled a lot for work to support us, and here she was using all of his hard earned money on drugs and to keep Chris. It was sick really. Angela and I would try to leave as often as we could, she always tried to take care of me. She's four years older than me."

Bella stopped than and I watched her push the remaining food around on her plate. I waited in silence hoping she would continue on and let me in just that much more.

"I was eleven. After school one day I came home and I ran in to tell my mom I'd gotten an A on my math test. I should've knocked first, I should've known, but my mom was always harping on me about my math grades so I figured she'd want to see…I was stupid."

Bella let out a large sigh before continuing on, "I was screaming 'MOMMY MOMMY' and threw the door open…they were having sex. I instantly shut up and back out of the room slamming the door and hid behind the couch. My mom was so furious, I could hear her screaming to him that she was going to kill me. I was so scared, I heard her rip the door open and stomp out trying to find me. Chris came out behind her and told her she better not touch me. I was so thankful than. But than he told her, 'find her, and bring her to me. Maybe she can join in the fun,' and I felt sick. I couldn't move. My mom was pissed when he said that, but not because I was her eleven year old daughter…"

Anger formed in her eyes as she pressed on, tears playing at her lashes, "but because I was her competition."

Her face was twisted in complete hatred than, and I was sure my eyes were alive with the horror unfolding in front of me.

"She argued she was the only one for him, I couldn't treat him the way she could. He slapped her. She lunged at him, but he shoved her against the wall and told her to, 'shut the fuck up'. So pathetic, she started sobbing and crying. Pleading that she could be good enough for him. He threw her down, and she hit the corner of the coffee table and was knocked out."

"I was panicked then. He was going to find me, to come after me. I kept my hand over my mouth the entire time, too scared to even think of a way out. I heard the front door open, it was Phil and Angela. I was so happy, but so scared. Chris must've heard him cause they didn't see him when they first walked in. Angela ran over to my mother, and my Phil was too busy looking for me. I heard a thud and the next thing I knew Phil was being dragged into the living room by Chris. He grabbed Angela, who had tried to run from him at that point. He tied the two together. Chris said he just wanted to know where I was. Of course he was too wasted to remember that they hadn't even been there when I hid, but he kept pressing them regardless."

"I realized I could see them through the crack in the couch, and Phil caught sight of me. His eyes widened, but he didn't say anything. Chris demanded again that Phil tell him where I was. Phil told him even if he knew he would never give me up. I heard a shot, and jumped realizing Chris had a gun. Phil was slumped forward, but I could tell he wasn't dead, and he kept staring at me. Almost as if he was trying to tell me something with his eyes, but I was too afraid to move, too afraid to understand."

Bella's eyes dark now and I could tell this story was getting increasingly hard to relive, and I wanted to tell her to stop. I needed her to stop this story, but I couldn't open my mouth. No I had to hear, because the story hadn't stopped for her, and it couldn't stop now just because I was uncomfortable.

"Angela was crying than, 'Daddy, daddy are you okay?' their backs were tied together so she couldn't see the gaping hole in his head. God I was glad she couldn't see that hole. I was surprised she called him daddy too, usually she just called him Phil. She only ever called Charlie daddy before, after he was killed on duty she refused to call Phil anything but his name. Daddy was a name to sacred for her to say to someone else."

"Anyway, she kept crying to Phil, asking if he was okay. Chris smacked her than, and it made me so mad. 'I just fucking killed him you bitch' he spat at her. I hated him, I wanted him dead, but my body refused to move. 'BELLA' Angela screamed at me, 'BELLA, PLEASE, IF YOU CAN HEAR ME RUN GET YOURSELF OUT. BELLA RUN!"

"Chris raised the gun to her too and I panicked, my body suddenly mobile as I jumped over the couch, 'Chris please don't,' I begged. Angela couldn't see me, but she must've heard my plea to Chris, 'RUN BELLA RUN,' she shouted to me. But I kept trying, kept begging. If Chris wanted me, he could have me. In anyway he liked, but he couldn't kill Angela…not Angela…, 'No, please don't hurt her. Please no,' I begged as he cocked the gun. I tried once more, 'No. Please no. Please. PLEASE.' My eyes closed as the shot rang out, 'NO, ANGELA' I screamed so loud I thought my vocal chords could rip from my throat if that was at all possible."

"Everything seemed to be moving in slow motion, but I realized all of this had happened within that hour of my A. That stupid fucking A. Why couldn't I just get a C like usual? Than I never would've barged in there. Everyone would be fine…My eyes finally opened, and now Angela and Phil were slumped over, but Angelas eyes were on me this time. She looked so scared. For me. She died for me. I should've saved her, should've been able to do more…"

Bella's voice trailed off as sobs overtook her now. I went to her, wrapping my arms around her while trying to wrap my mind around what she had just told me. Chris killed her family. Holy fuck, how old was this guy? Bella shoved away from me suddenly as she sprinted towards the bathroom. I heard her vomit, and knew it wasn't because of the baby but from the images that were no doubt ingrained in her thoughts.

At that moment I hated Chris. I wanted him dead. It didn't matter if he had ever completely 180 after that, he was a fucking monster. After a few minutes Bella re-emerged, her arms wrapped tightly around her body.

"He took me than, and we left. He wiped his prints from the gun, and stuck it in my moms. When the police were finally called she was found passed out with god knows how many drugs in her system, a gun in her hand, and her family dead on the floor. They assumed I had run away, but nobody cared enough to come after me. She was convicted and sent away, and I was forever stuck with Chris…"

Her voice was hoarse from crying.

"Until you got away," I added, and she looked at me with eyes that told me in her heart she still wasn't away from him.

"No, I think he was in my apartment last night. That's why I panicked and came here…" her eyes widened as she looked at me, "Oh my god, I never should've come here! He'll kill you now if he finds out you're involved with me in anyway. Oh fuck, I have to go," she said before nearly sprinting to the door, but I was closer and got there first as I blocked her only exit.

"You can't go," I demanded, "If he was in your apartment last night you can't just go back there. He could kill you and the baby. You're not leaving." Her face showed relief at my demand, but she seemed even more scared.

"I don't want you to get hurt Edward," she sobbed, her face in her hands again. I stepped forward embracing her fully, her tears staining my shirt.

"Well I won't let you go back there, not without me. And if you go back there, it's only to get some things. You're going to be staying with me," she nodded her head as her breath began to steady, her arms timidly wrapping around my waist.

We moved to the couch, both mindlessly watching tv although neither of us were paying any attention to the screen. Bella's head was in my lap, and I gently ran my fingers through her hair, trying to calm her. I was the first to break the silence.

"Is your mom still in jail?"

Bella sighed, "No. Chris paid her way out a few years after she was convicted. He's very powerful. Chris doesn't just run a drug operation, but he dabbles in a bunch of other illegal activity. Working for him I didn't just help have to help him deal, I helped him find his prostitutes. It's not something I'm proud of, but I was the one that convinced them to come with me. I promised them better lives," Her voice caught in her throat as she looked at me trying to gauge my reaction. "If a man paid enough he could even own one of us…" Bella grew silent as she stared down deep in though and I tried to grasp everything she was saying.

"Anyway, Chris had some dirt on certain people in the appeals office, and he threatened to blackmail them if they didn't let Renee go. After Renee was released she was just glad to be back with Chris. He made her job to look after me, and make sure I stayed in line. She hated me for it, hated every minute of it, but she did it because she loves Chris…"

"I tried to go to the police once, but just my luck he was one of the men Chris employed in the police station that made sure his drug deals never got busted. He pays off cops a lot, hell he even paid off a few federal agents once. His dad is a Congressman, and he even holds a lot of power after that. Their family is very…corrupt." her voice was sardonic as she laughed emptily. "I know he has more power then that, but I don't know all the details, he kept a lot of things from all of us."

We were silent again. How could her mom be so cruel? How could someone like Chris be out there doing this to people? I kept playing with Bella's hair as thoughts continued to race through my mind. I was trying to come up with a game plan to keep Bella safe forever, but I wasn't entirely certain how I could do that. But I would give everything I had to at least try. Before long Bella's breathing slowed. I didn't want to break the moment or the contact and waited until I was nearly falling asleep myself before I lifted her gently from the couch and laid her down in my bed.

Her shirt raised up slightly revealing the barely noticeable bump developing. My hand reached down as I leaned closer to her stomach, "Daddy will make you safe," I whispered before lightly placing a kiss on the bump.

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BPOV

My dreams were all jumbled that night, first they started out much like last nights. Chris was there. I could see Phil, and hear his and my sisters brave attempts to keep me safe, even though they didn't even know if I was in the house. I dreamt of the look of possession in his eyes as he stared at me realizing he could have me, and only me all to myself. I was crying, praying my mom would wake up and come to her senses. Praying she would use the gun Chris had placed in her hands to save me from his.

Midway through my dream Edward was there, holding a child. He was laughing and smiling, and wanting me to come join them. I felt so afraid, afraid that if I fell for this fantasy that eventually I would awake in my hovel once again under Chris's thumb. They kept beckoning to me, but I couldn't go to them. I couldn't get my own hopes up and I couldn't put them in the danger I knew tended to follow me. The more I worried and refused to go with them the further away I seemed to get.

Finally they were completely gone, and it was complete darkness. Chris was nearby, I could tell because the hair on the back of my neck was standing up. I wanted to get away from him, but wasn't sure where he was in the first place and was afraid I would end up running straight into him. I could hear a baby crying, and I felt the pull to go to it, but my fear kept me in place. I heard a strange noise and the child was silenced instantly as I heard Chris's distinct low chuckle.

My eyes flew open, but I didn't move, and I looked down to see Edward's hand on my exposed stomach. He was talking softly to the baby, he thought I was still sleeping. I closed my eyes, and listened as he told our child stories. Every few sentences he would pause before saying, "Don't worry, it'll be okay, I'm going to keep you and mommy safe," and I wondered if he was saying that because he believed it or because he was trying to convince himself that he somehow could. I tried not to think to much about it, and drifted back to sleep hearing childhood stories of Edward.

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Sorry it took so long guys.

A) Had a slight bought of writers block until last night

B) this chapter was extremely hard to write so please go easy on me

C) I am not making you guys wait for this to be beta'd because well….I'm pretty upset myself from this revelation {remember I didn't realize I would be writing THIS until last night} and I just wanna get it out there and move on. I'm still gonna have it beta'd and just stick up the revised version at a later date….maybe….

Remember reviews encourage Bella and Edward to continue this story, as it is a rather tough one.


	5. Don't Ever Leave Me

Soooo, nobody be too mad...this chapter was ready from beta {InkStainedFire} three days ago. *ducks* but before you start getting too mad I was out of town, so i haven't be avoiding you intentionally i swear! plus to make things better, next chapter is in the making....expect it wednesday....

I'm a writing fool today, but no worries this one is more fluffy and happy and all that good stuff.

EPOV

I woke up the next morning to find Bella missing from my side, and after straining I realized I couldn't hear anything from the bathroom. Taking a deep breath I placed my feet on the cold wooden floors, hoping that Bella hadn't really left after all that she had revealed the previous night. Especially after she thought Chris had recently been to visit her.

Stepping out my room my nose was immediately filled with the most delicious smell, and an adorable Bella flitting around the kitchen like a pro. I leaned against the door frame and watched her; she was thoroughly enthralled in what she was doing. I was glad she could look so content this morning, when suddenly she spun and turned to me.

"Oh good, you're up! Coffee?" she asked, nodding her head towards the coffee pot. I agreed, and she quickly poured me a cup before continuing on in her endeavor.

"It smells delicious in here," I said and was greeted with a huge smile and a slight blush from Bella. She turned back around, pouring some contents into a bowl before mixing it swiftly. She propped the bowl on her hip as she turned towards me still stirring. Before she could say anything a huge smile broke out on my face. She had flour or pancake mix or something of the sort on the end of her nose and a slight smudge on her right cheek as well.

"What?" she asked before blushing even more deeply.

"You uh, have something on your face," I said as I moved towards her to wipe it away. My hand swept the counter and instead of wiping it away I only added more and burst into a laugh.

"Oh you think that's funny do you?" she said slyly before picking up a small handful of the powder from the counter.

"Bella, come on now, it was an accident," I said, both of my hands out in defeat as I slowly began to back away from her, her smile only widened as she moved closer to me. I turned to leave and saw powder flying around me, but I knew she had missed as I bolted into my room.

I could hear her close on my heals, and for the first time I heard a small giggle out of her before I quickly turned into the bathroom. Bella came around the corner, a mischievous look in her eyes, her hands behind her back.

"Edward, come on, I'm making this delicious breakfast for you. Come on out, I promise I won't hurt you."

I continued to back up, although I knew there was no escaping her. Suddenly I slipped, and my feet seemed to scissor kick as I tried to find my balance once again, but ended up in the bathtub nonetheless. I landed with an "umph" as Bella came rushing to my side.

"Edward! Are you okay?" her eyes looked truly concerned. Because I didn't want her to worry, plus the small gouge to my pride, I smiled at her and told her I was fine despite the throbbing in my backside. "Oh good," she responded as her hand came up to smooth my hair away. Her smile was back and it was then I realized her hand had still been covered with flour. As if to prove the little deceit that had taken place a tiny bit of it fluttered into my eyes.

Her eyes widened as she realized I knew what was going on before she too bolted out the door. I got up quickly heading back out to the kitchen only to find that she had already found a hiding spot.

"Come on now Bella, that wasn't very nice, I could've been seriously hurt!" She giggled loudly from her hiding place as I moved quietly over the floor, trying to surprise her. I looked in every nook in the living room and in the hall closet before returning to my room. I ran my fingers through my hair as more flour covered my hand. "Bella, come on. Let's finish making my breakfast, I'm hungry."

I waited a few minutes, but she didn't believe me and stayed in her hiding spot.

"Bella," I tried to say as seductively and smooth as I could muster without busting up laughing, "let's feed the baby, I bet your starving."

"Oh real mature Edward," I heard a tiny voice call out to me as I tried to decipher from where, "use the baby against me." I moved towards the bed and quickly looked underneath, only to find Bella jump up from the other side. We faced each other, only the bed between us. She had no escape now.

"Come here Bella," I said seductively again and watched as goosebumps ran across her skin.

"Edward, I think you're right, I need to feed the baby," she began, noting my hand as an evil grin overtook my face.

"I just wanna hug you first," I said as I began around the bed for her. She jumped up on the bed, but I grabbed her ankle at the last minute and she toppled on the mattress with a tiny squeal.

"Bella, are you hurt?" I wasn't trying to use her trick, my concern was genuine. I wasn't exactly up to date on the rules with pregnant woman. I was on the bed now, leaning towards her as she stared up at me shyly.

"I'm fine, just because I'm pregnant doesn't mean I'm disabled," she said, apparently knowing what I was thinking as she rolled her eyes. I sighed as I ran my clean hand over her cheek bone.

"I just…don't ever want you to hurt when you're with me," I whispered, and wondered if this would push her away. Instead tears began to fill her eyes, and without thinking I leaned down pressing my lips gently to hers.

She froze for a second, before her hands flew to our faces as she pulled me closer. _ She wants me_, I celebrated internally as her fingers found their way into my hair. Our kisses were slow and deep, and I didn't want them to stop when suddenly there was a knock on the door. I growled out loud, and Bella just laughed at me as she stood up.

"Calm down Kujo, I'll get the door," she pecked my lips once more as she walked away towards the front door. I wondered who it was as I stood up. Chris wouldn't come to the door would he? As soon as the thought crossed my mind I was heading towards Bella in a flash.

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BPOV

I was as disappointed as Edward sounded when I heard the door knock, but went to answer it anyway. Pulling the door opened I found a short dark haired girl staring at me in surprise. She was dressed like a woman straight out of a fashion magazine, and her hair stuck out on all sides. It was an endearing look on her. She wore small square framed glasses that made her look intelligent and I gaped at her as she stared back at me in confusion.

"Oh I'm sorry I must've gotten the wrong…" she peered around me at the number on the door, "no this is the right apartment…um is Edward here?"

Crap. I should've known he was involved with someone. What made me think just because I was carrying his child that he didn't have a girlfriend or something? Stupid, stupid stupid.

Edward nearly ran to the door than, and I blushed feeling embarrassed to be found out like this. I had never meant to cause any trouble or discomfort for anyone, but the woman at the door didn't seem upset just curious.

"Alice," Edward said as he wrapped his arms around my waist. Oh man, this was not good. Was he using me to break up with this girl? I'm a home wrecker. God Bella, you really can't do anything right can you? What if she wants to beat me up? I wouldn't blame her, but what if it hurts the baby? I can't have that happening; I should get out of here…

"Brother," she responded, and instantly my pounding heart was for a different reason. Of course Edward had family; would they hate me for being pregnant with his child? Would they think I had trapped him somehow if they found out I was a 'starving' artist?

Alice smiled at him, "Are you gonna let me in or just make me stand out here?" she chimed, and we both moved aside as she brushed past me.

"She's a little eccentric, but she's sweet. Don't worry," Edward murmured in my ear as I closed the door and he stepped away towards his sister.

"To what do I owe the pleasure Alice?" Edward asked, one eye brow cocked.

"Can't I just come visit my twin brother without you jumping down my throat?" She responded smiling, before throwing her arms around him.

Twin? Didn't twins have some like psychic power or something and could read one another's minds?

"And who is this beautiful woman you have been hiding from us Edward? Really, you couldn't even have told me? I didn't even know you were seeing someone!" she exclaimed as she turned towards me beaming causing me to feel oddly at ease with her.

"Alice, this is Bella. Bella, this is my crazy sister Alice." She slapped him lightly on the shoulder as I extended my hand, but instead she pulled me into a hug as if she'd known me forever.

"How did you two meet? How long have you been together? Is your wardrobe always this drab?" she questioned all in one breath. I looked at Edward but he was only smiling and shaking his head.

"Well…um…" I stuttered, not sure how to answer this. Would Edward be ashamed of how we had met?

"Well the most important question out of all that was, is your wardrobe always this drab? Because if it is, we need a shopping trip today." I stared at her; really all she was worried about was my clothing?

"Alice, back off. You're gonna scare her away," Edward jumped in, protectively putting an arm around me. "We kind of had a one night stand a few months ago. Guess what Alice, you're gonna be an aunt!"

I waited for the yelling that would ensue. I expected Alice to tell Edward he was stupid and should've used protection. So I was surprised when Alice squealed and somehow managed to pull the both of us into a hug while successively jumping up and down at the same time.

"OH MY GOD! Okay new important question, can I do the babies wardrobe?" I laughed at that one, Edward wasn't kidding when he said she was eccentric.

"All you worry about is clothes Alice. But I suppose you can do the wardrobe if Bella doesn't object," he asked, shooting me a sideways glance.

"I don't mind at all, I'm not good with the clothes stuff," and Alice only nodded as she eyed my clothes up and down. Alice continued to stare between Edward and I, and I shifted uncomfortably under her stare.

"Oh Carlisle and Esme are going to be so happy Edward!" Alice exclaimed suddenly, "First grandchild! Ohhh can I be the one to tell Rose? You know she and Emmett have been trying to have kids for so long now, she's gonna hate you even more for being the first!"

Edward laughed as he shook his head, and I only looked at him confused. Who were Carlisle, Esme, Rose, and Emmett? How many brothers and sisters did he have anyway?

"Carlisle and Esme are our parents, but they insisted when we were growing up not to call them mom and dad because it made them feel old and because they wanted us to feel as though we could come to them as friends not authoritative figures. They're still stuck in their hippy days. Emmett is our older brother and Rose is his wife. Half the time we get along and the rest of the time we're at one another's throats," he clarified and somehow I felt better about that.

"They're gonna love you Bella! They love who we love," she added before winking at Edward, and finally it was his turn to blush. Wait, Edward loved me? My stomach did flips at this thought, but I frowned inwardly as well. It wasn't good to become this attached to someone.

Wanting to break this awkward silence I quickly walked towards the kitchen asking over my shoulder, "I'm making breakfast, would you like to join us Alice?" She yelled in agreement back at me as I began to busy myself once again.

Despite my attempt at staying busy I still heard Alice whisper to Edward, "She's a keeper Edward," before he quickly quieted her, and I was glad my back was to them as I blushed furiously.

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Breakfast was extremely enjoyable, and despite Alice's obsession with shopping I found that she reminded me of Angela in many ways. She was a nurse as Angela had always wanted to be, and had a compassion and understanding of people that was so intense it was almost as if she could read their minds.

I found myself smiling more in the couple of hours I spent with her than I could remember in my entire life. We laughed and I listened to her tell stories of her, Edward, and Emmett growing up. They sounded like quite the heathens.

Alice was gasping for air as Edward was trying to hide his face in his hands, "and when Edward got caught with the bottle of vodka by Esme she was livid! But he just turned to her and said 'Esme, as my friend you can either share this or get out of my room,'" he was shaking his head but was still clearly enjoying this memory as Alice continued on, "so what does Esme do? She pulls out two shot glasses! Edward didn't know what to do after she called his bluff!" They were both busting up than and I smiled, enjoying their interaction.

I couldn't help the twinge of jealously I felt that Edward could have memories so sweet with all of his family. And even though his parents hadn't liked him calling them by a conventional name they had still been there. They continued on their stories as I excused myself quietly heading towards the bathroom.

I turned on the shower, and quickly climbed in as the tears finally fell down my face. I wished Angela and I could've gone to parties together, been able to talk about boys together. I wished Phil could've been there to lecture a boy before taking me to a dance. That my mom would teach me how to do my makeup for the first time. But instead I had some fucked up memories.

I cried until the hot water ran out, but still I continued to stand under the freezing water.

"Bella," Edwards muffled voice came through the door as he knocked gently, "are you alright in there?"

"Alice went home, she said to tell you bye. What are you doing in there?"

"Bella, answer me!"

I didn't respond, and I knew I should, but the aching in my heart was too much to bear. Edwards pounding became harder and his voice became tenser as he begged me to let him know I was alright.

"Bella, don't freak out, I'm coming in!" he finally said, "please be okay," I heard him murmur before opening the door quickly. He ripped open the shower curtain and saw my shivering body standing there as my fingers and toes were shriveled. Without a word he turned off the shower and grabbed a towel before wrapping me in it.

"Dammit Bella, what are you doing? I'm trying here, I am, but I don't know what to do for you. Please help me? God you're freezing, come on lets warm you up."

He began to rub me down with the towel before wrapping my cool damp hair up away from my skin. My teeth began chattering and his hands felt so warm on my skin that it felt like he was burning me.

"I'm going to strip down to my boxers; you need my body heat. You're freezing Bella. You've been in there an hour and a half, how long ago did the warm water run out?"

I shrugged my shoulders as we climbed into bed, Edward wrapping me up in his arms.

"Bella, talk to me. Please. I won't judge you. I won't hurt you. I just wanna be here for you." His fingers were on my cheeks, brushing away more unnoticed tears.

"I'm sorry," I finally managed, "Alice is great," I admitted but he didn't seem convinced.

"Did she say something to upset you," he asked frowning, "I'll talk to her about it. Tell me, what did she say?"

"No, no…she didn't upset me. You two seem close," I added and he looked even more confused but nodded his head.

"We are close, she's one of my best friends," and as if a light bulb went off in his head his eyes suddenly widened as he hugged me closer to him.

"I just miss her so much ya know?" I cried into his bare chest.

He kissed my forehead then, and I tilted my head slightly and he kissed between my eyebrows. This time he continued on; kissing the bridge of my nose, than the tip, and finally his lips found mine. His lips weren't frantic or forceful. They were caring, letting me take my time.

His hands traced down my skin, but it still wasn't in a sexual way. It was in a protective loving manner. His hand stopped on my stomach as he kissed me deeply, and something about the sentiment almost moved to me to tears as I gasped leaning back to look into Edward's eyes. His too were glittering, and I moved forward kissing him again. He didn't move his hand as our kissing resumed, and I placed my hand over his, feeling closer to him than I had ever felt to anyone in my life before.

Finally our kisses began to slow, and I lifted my hand from his as I stared into his eyes stroking his hair gently. His eyes began to flutter close, and he mumbled something before falling asleep.

"Bella, don't leave me."

His words had me confused, and I felt the conflict war through my body. In Edward's arms I was safe. I was loved. My mind was suddenly thrown back to what Alice had said earlier. She thought Edward was in love with me, or at least falling in love with me. After this, I couldn't deny that I too was beginning to feel something for Edward. My rationality began to fight with me

_You're __broken, _I reminded myself.

He wants to fix me, _but for how long?_

_He'll give up on you_, I trust that he won't.

_You're dangerous to him_, Chris didn't follow me here.

He makes me feel safe, _but you know he can't protect you forever._

But both sides came together on my last thought before falling into a deep sleep.

**You're going to end up getting him killed.**

I snuggled my head deeper into Edward's chest, focusing on his breathing as I fell into a deep sleep.

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Reviews are better than snuggling with Edward naked


	6. An Unexpected Invitation

Can I just say how HARD it is to write fluff. Honestly. All I can think of is things to come….but things that happen in this and a couple upcoming chapters have information that needs to be known.

Love you all, your reviews are amazing and help me to sleep better at night. I can feel my ego spreading with ever review I get. I'll try to get it under control.

Oh and I noticed people seemed to think I was wrong with my statement "Reviews are better than snuggling with Edward naked," and I must change that because I was tired when I typed it out and that is not what I meant AT ALL, "Reviews are ALMOST better than snuggling with Edward naked…ALMOST"

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EPOV

I woke up to the feel of Bella kissing my face as she quietly pleaded with me.

"Edward, please, please wake up," she begged as my face continued to be assaulted. I opened one eye and looked at her. "Please Edward, let me go," she requested which only caused me to pull her closer to me.

"Edwaaaaaard, I have to pee, please let me up!" I chuckled at her, but set her free as she dashed across the floor to the door. My grin widened as I watched her naked figure disappear behind my door.

The grin was still on my face when she walked out, and she looked at me which made me smile wider as she gasped.

"Don't do that," she murmured, trying to hide her face in her hair as she blushed.

"What," I questioned.

"Smile at me like that…it makes my stomach feel all jittery. I get enough of that from the kid," she said jokingly pointing down at her stomach. I opened my arms to her, scooting over to make room, as she came to me eagerly, nestling into the crook of my arm.

"I need to install a space heater in you, you were out of this bed for less than ten minutes and you're already freezing again!" I exclaimed as she pressed her foot up against me to prove just how cold she was.

"And you need to wear socks all the time!"

She laughed at me than and I began to run my fingers through her tangled hair.

"So now that we slept an entire day away, what's on the agenda for today?"

She bit her lip, "I need to go home," she said. My heart stopped as I looked down at her, I thought we had gone over that yesterday.

"Bella…"

"Well I need to get my cameras, and equipment and stuff. You're coming with me to help me right?"

I exhaled, relief washing over me as I realized she wasn't trying to leave me.

"Like I would let you go alone."

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I was amazed to see all the equipment Bella had as I helped her carry each piece down to my car. I wondered briefly where we would put it all, but decided I would clean out my entire living room for her if she needed it.

The entire time we were at her apartment I was by her side, she seemed to be jumpy and nearly screamed when she heard the creak of her closet as it was blown open by the wind. I had nearly expected to see somebody lurking inside, or anything at the least. I couldn't blame her for being so frightened, so instead I stood closer to her letting her know that I was there for her.

After skillfully placing everything in my apartment I watched as Bella came to life right before my eyes. Bella was in her element and she seemed to shine as she whirled skillfully around. Before I knew it there were amazing breathtaking pictures throughout my apartment, as she continued to produce print after print.

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BPOV

The sound of the phone ringing caught my attention, and I turned to watch Edward answer it. My eyes seemed to be mesmerized by the clear outline of his jaw that was lightly scattered with stubble. I watched enchanted as his full lips moved, forming the words he was saying to the person on the other end. I wasn't listening to a word he said.

His sparkling emerald eyes dimmed only for a moment and I wondered what the person had told him on the other line to make that happen. He glanced up and noticed me staring as he smiled and winked at me causing me to blush and look away hastily.

What was I doing? Edward's gorgeous features definitely weren't helping my resolve to say away from him, but I reminded myself how much I needed to stay away.

_It's all about keeping him safe, Bella._

I heard the click of the phone as Edward sighed, turning his body fully to face me.

"So…don't freak out," he began, effectively causing my heart to race by just saying that, "Alice told my parents about you…and the baby."

I felt my heart in my throat, and knew my eyes must be wide and crazed now. Edward tried to reassure me with his smile, but it wasn't working. His smile changed into a frown as he spoke to me.

"Breathe, Bella," I hadn't even realized I'd been holding my breath until he said that, "they're not mad, they just want to meet you."

"When?" my voiced sounded timid and scared as I waited for his response.

"Tonight…?" It sounded more like a question than a statement.

"So soon?! What do I wear? I have nothing _to_ wear!" I exclaimed, suddenly feeling frenzied.

"Calm down, Alice is on her way now. She wants to take you shopping." Oh crap, great, just what I need.

"Oh, but I don't have that much…" I stopped, biting my lip, too embarrassed to admit I was nearly flat broke.

"Don't worry, it's taken care of," Edward said, smiling at me once again. Knots formed in my stomach.

"But how? I can't let…," Edward put a finger over my lips to silence me.

"You should go get ready, Alice'll be here any moment."

"Wait, what about you? Aren't you coming with us?" The last thing I needed was to be taken shopping to let someone else pay for me, and all without Edward.

"Oh, you two just go, I need to swing by the office to grab some paperwork anyway."

I wasn't ready to be alone with someone from Edward's family, especially someone so close. What if she didn't like me? What if this time proved to her how bad I was for Edward?

_It doesn't matter,_ my mind hissed at me, _you're not going to be around long enough for it to matter._

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APOV

I pulled up to my brothers apartment nearly bouncing in anticipation. I felt bad for upsetting Bella yesterday, although I'm not really sure what happened. Maybe she would talk to me about it today.

I was also thrilled to be able to help Bella with her wardrobe, cause after seeing her clothes yesterday I knew she needed it. Bad.

Reaching the door, I knocked quickly as I rocked back and forth on my heels waiting for someone to answer the door already. Edward pulled open the door, and let me in with no Bella in sight.

"She's still getting ready," he told me, as he gestured for me to sit down on the couch. I fidgeted on the couch for ten minutes before Bella finally emerged. I only knew she had entered the room by the sharp intake of breath from my brother.

Looking up I saw her dressed in jeans and a plain t-shirt. She didn't look half as good as she could, and still my brother was acting like she had just walked off a runway and into his apartment. Man he had it bad.

I rolled my eyes as my brother continued to stare at her, clearly undressing her with his eyes as she stood blushing before him. I grabbed her arm quickly dragging her out the door.

"See you at mom and dads!" I yelled closing the door before my brother could say anything in protest. That hadn't been part of our deal, but I wanted him to be truly surprised when he saw her.

Bella seemed nervous in the car and kept fidgeting with her seat belt as she stared out of the window. I hoped I wasn't making her too uncomfortable, I was very aware how I came off to people and knew often times I could be too much to handle.

"So Bella, tell me about yourself," I asked, her eyes narrowed and I knew she was trying to figure out what to say, "You don't have to if you don't want." I added in and she seemed to relax. There was something about this girl, and I couldn't quite put my finger on it. It wasn't a bad thing, it just made me feel like I wanted to wrap her into a hug and never let her go.

"Don't be too afraid of me, trust me my personalities big, but I'm harmless," I joked winking at her, "I can tell, we're going to be great friends."

She smiled, and this time it seemed genuine causing my smile to only widen on my face.

"Tell me about you," she said meekly, and I was only happy to spill everything about me to her, if she was willing to listen.

"Well I'm married to this guy named Jasper. He's so wonderful, we've been married about three years now, and every day gets better and better!" I exclaimed, feeling the tug at my heart at the mention of Jasper. Just thinking about him made me miss him. As if he could read my thoughts my phone suddenly vibrated.

_Only 6 more hours until I can feel the warmth of your skin._

I sighed as I read it, any time away from Jasper always felt like an eternity. Bella seemed curious by my sudden change in expression.

"Even now it's hard to be away from him. We've liked each other since we were five and still almost 20 years later I still miss him tremendously after five minutes, and he's not any better." Bella's eyes furrowed as she looked down at her hands, and I realized how stupid I must sound, "I know, I know, it sounds silly."

She looked up at me, "No, it doesn't sound silly. I just…wonder what that feels like," she asked.

"It's wonderful, amazing….ha, and ridiculous all at the same time. Honestly it's the best feeling you can ever experience, and sometimes you just wonder, 'why am I acting so crazy, why can't I go ten minutes without freaking out with that person' and you just realize it just…is. It's what we were made for, to experience this. It's everything." I glanced over at Bella, and I saw her eyes glittering with tears, "Don't worry, you'll find him." I told her as we pulled into the parking lot, she smiled at me sadly, but didn't respond.

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BPOV

I thought about what Alice had said as she drug me through store after store and shoved me into every kind of fabric known to man. What could that possibly feel like?

My relationship with Chris creeped back into my mind. Although he had acquired by a strange manner, after so long I had started to develop feelings for him. Those last five years I truly thought I had been in love with him. Maybe it had been the drugs talking, or maybe I just wanted to feel like I mattered to someone.

But I could clearly distinguish now that I had not ever loved Chris. I desired nothing but to be away from him. I cherished every moment to myself, and when I finally left I had loved my freedom. I still love my freedom. When Chris had touched me it hadn't excited me, but made my insides cringe.

Edward flashed across my mind as I thought of him wrapping his warm body into mine. I felt the small knot in my stomach followed by a twinge of something I couldn't quite recognize. I wondered about my bodys reaction to the thought, and figured it must just be the hormones from the pregnancy.

We stopped in the food court as Alice talked about her work and the things she loved about it. I smiled and decided if I was ever in the hospital I would definitely want her as my nurse. She squealed when I told her so, and nearly caused me to vomit by hugging me so hard.

Mid sentence her phone rang and she answered it. I figured it must be Jasper because Alice seemed entirely lost to the world after that. Out of curiosity I glanced at my own phone, wishing I had someone who was missing me. I noticed a text message there, and I thought nothing of it, figuring it was some promotion. My eyes widened as I saw who it was from:

_Ready to pull all of that beautiful hair out yet?_

My heart hammered in my chest as I read it. Edward thought my hair was beautiful. I smelled it and thought of him as my stomach did that strange knot thing again. I quickly typed a response:

_Not quite, you could help distract me though so I don't completely lose my mind._

I closed my phone quickly, closing my eyes wishing I could pull the words from the air and shove them back into my head. I had no clue where that confident Bella had come from. My phone buzzed quickly and I flipped it out without hesitation hoping Edward wouldn't think I was crazy.

_Anything to help with your sanity. Plus it makes me miss you less._

_My heart stuttered at that last part. Edward missed me, the knot grew tighter. Was that what that was, I missed him? I felt confused by the foreign emotion, as a vision of Edward talking to my stomach emerged. My stomach knotted even tighter, and I suddenly hoped I would get to see him do it again. I felt panicked at the thought. I was getting more and more attached the more time I spent with Edward, and I knew that was dangerous. _

_Alice interrupted my thoughts suddenly, "Missing Edward," she asked, all too knowingly and I blushed. There was never hiding anything with me._

Edward and I continued to text throughout the shopping trip and it really made everything more bearable. I could only tolerate so many stores before all of my patience and kindness was up.

I felt good about the items we purchased and couldn't wait to see what Edwards opinion of me in them would be. I blushed at the thought, and wondered if he would try to kiss me. My rational side tried to speak up, but I silenced it quickly promising I just wanted one night to enjoy before making a clean break from this man. I needed at least one good memory.

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EPOV

I quickly hurried to the office after Alice and Bella left, trying to do as much paperwork as I could before dinner. Sitting there staring at the papers, however, I find myself consumed with thoughts of Bella.

What was she doing? Where had Alice dragged her? Was she having fun? What if something happened to her?

My mind went crazy with thoughts and scenarios, and I kicked myself for being so clingy. Bella was safely at the mall with my sister, and I needed to get some work done not sit here and think about her.

I worked fast after that, still telling myself the quicker I got done the sooner I could see Bella. Apparently I motivated myself too much because I was finished within the hour, and frowned upon realizing I still had a few hours to spare before I would see that beautiful smile again.

After arguing with myself for a few minutes, I finally sent Bella a text message, telling myself I just wanted to make sure she wasn't feeling overwhelmed. She joked with me and I was surprised by her response. She wanted to talk to me…was she flirting with me?

I responded, telling her how much I missed her. I kicked myself after sending the message thinking I would probably overwhelm Bella with that. But she responded and we continued to talk for the rest of her shopping trip. We only stopped when Alice took her phone, texting me, telling me to leave her date alone and that I could see her shortly. I sighed throwing my phone on my bed deciding to take a shower and get ready.

I stepped into the bathroom, and smiled thinking of our powder fight the morning before. I wished I could relive that moment right now, wished Bella could be here, touching my hair even if her hand was covered in powder.

I stood in the water letting it wash over me like my thoughts of Bella. By the time I hopped out of the shower I realized my day dreaming had now caused me to be nearly late. I quickly threw on my clothes as I hopped into my car.

I tapped anxiously on the steering wheel on my drive to my parents. I felt jittery and nervous, like every one of my first dates rolled into one. I wondered vaguely if I might need ridelin soon, but pushed the thought from my mind too consumed with Bella.

I rushed inside my parents greeting me at the door.

"She's not down yet," my dad answered, noticing my glace around the room.

"She's a lovely girl, Edward," my mother winked at me as she kissed my cheek. Alice must've told her more than just about the baby and Bella. She had obviously told Esme about her theory that I was in love with her. I rolled my eyes again and Alice's idea, how could I love someone I barely knew anyway?

I stepped into the living room where Emmett was already and I watched as he stuffed our mothers appetizers into his mouth.

"You know chewing never hurts," I told him, as he turned around hugging me close to him and clapping my back.

"Edmph its gmph to see ymph."

"Try swallowing before you talk," I laughed at him and he only grinned at me before swallowing the contents of his mouth. I was amazed he didn't choke on all of the food that had been in there.

"Heard you found a lady friend," he said raising his eyebrows at me as if it was the most surprising thing he had ever experienced.

"Hey, I've had tons of girl friends," I said defensively as I crossed my arms.

"Your hand doesn't count as a girlfriend," I heard Rosalie scoff as she walked in, linking her arm in Emmetts. I grinned at her.

"I see we remembered to flip our bitch switch this morning," I retorted as she huffed, looking up at Emmett as if he was expected to defend her.

"You two never stop," he said instead, as his eyes moved to the doorway. I spun around quickly and my eyes nearly bugged out of my head.

Bella stood before me, in the most simple yet beautiful thing I have ever seen her in. Her legs were bound tightly in dark blue pants, and her shirt was a light lavender color that accented her skin perfectly and caused her eyes to seem even more golden then usual. Her hair was in a sloppy updo, that looked like it actually probably took a lot of time to perfect with a few curly wisps surrounding her face. She had a small amount of make up on, just enough to accent every perfect feature in her face.

"Wow," I managed to stutter, as she blushed adding the final touch to her look.

"Damn bro," my brother whispered into my ear, as I hear Rose slap his shoulder. I couldn't have agreed more.

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Can I just say again….fluff sucks. Decided not to send this chapter to BETA, because honestly….I just want to be done with this fluff, so I can start on the next fluff, so I can get to the good stuff already! Lol. Please forgive me InkStainedFire.


	7. Lemon Meringue Pie

I love that you all love my fluff…onwards to dinner…and other things! Lemon meringue pie for dessert maybe? Haha.

Love my Beta because she tries to inspire me {and actually did even though she didn't really say much lol, yes I'm that easily inspired} but once again needed to just get this chapter the hell out of my face.

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EPOV

After I finally picked my jaw up off the floor and made sure my tongue was securely back in my mouth I made my way over to Bella, holding my arm out to her. She linked her arm in mine, blushing furiously as Emmett smiled widely at the two of us.

"Bella have you met my brother, Emmett?" I asked her, hoping he wouldn't say anything to make an ass out of himself.

"Nice to meet you," Emmett boomed, and I celebrated that smooth introduction too quickly before he added, "what closet has Edward been hiding your hot ass in?"

Rosalie smacked his shoulder hard as she stuck out her own hand as she rolled her eyes, "He's a bafoon, don't listen to him. I'm Rosalie, his _better_ half." Bella shook her hand, but we could both sense the tension rolling off of Rose. She must know about the baby. Hell with Alice's big mouth I was surprised the entire state hadn't called to congratulate us yet.

After a few minutes of mindless chatter I finally got a moment alone with Bella.

"You look amazing," I breathed quietly into her ear only an inch or two away, and I felt the shiver run through her body. Before she could respond Esme was ushering us into the dining room.

We all sat quickly, Carlisle and Esme at each end of the table, while we all scattered aimlessly around them. I ended up next to Esme, Bella next to me and Alice on the other side of her. Emmett and Rose were on the other side, I noticed for the first time Jaspers presence, but figured something must have come up at work and shrugged it off. We all watched in awe as Emmett heaped food onto his plate.

"Mom you should've made enough for everyone," Alice teased as he started piling food onto his food. We all laughed, and settled comfortably in. Bella and I were quiet and not willing to start the conversation we knew would come.

"So," Carlisle began as he cleared his throat, setting down his fork, "I hear you two are expecting." Rosalies eyes narrowed as she turned to us, waiting for us to confirm the news as Bella looked down into her lap. I wish she wouldn't feel so uncomfortable.

"Yes," I answered, grabbing a hold of Bella's hand as I smiled down the table at Carlisle. Esme placed her hand on my free hand as she smiled at me brightly. I had never seen her happier.

"Well…I can't say I'm not thrilled," Carlisle began, "but I thought you would be the last one we'd be hearing that news from!" Everyone laughed and it was my turn to blush. It was true though, and to be honest, if I had never met Bella I never would've desired to have children. Sure this one was being somewhat thrust upon me, but everything about having a child with qualities from Bella was exhilarating to me.

"Bella," Esme beamed at her, "what is it that you do honey?" I was glad she asked that of all things, I knew it was something Bella loved and could talk about openly at all times.

"I'm a photographer," she responded, and I noticed the gleam of happiness that accompanied this topic. I was right.

"OH!" Alice exclaimed suddenly, "Bella I didn't know that about you! Carlisle and Esme are renewing their vows in a couple of months would you PLEASE take the pictures?" Bella blushed furiously.

"Alice, maybe we should get someone else. Bella is part of this family now, she should be _in_ the pictures not behind the camera," Carlisle commented as Bella once again looked into her lap, unused to this kind of attention.

"No," Bella said timidly, "it could be my present to you two. I don't always…er…make much, but this is something I love and tend to be good at. It would be my pleasure to take the pictures!"

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BPOV

After I agreed with Alice about taking pictures for the vow renewal she wouldn't stop talking about it. I tried to pay attention, but found my attention kept being pulled back to Edward. I watched as his jaw tensed and loosened as he munched on his food and felt fascinated by the muscles flexing before my eyes.

He caught me staring at him once, and instantly seemed concerned, and I suddenly realized he might think I felt uncomfortable. But the reality was I had never felt more comfortable in my entire life. Everyone seemed so at ease, nobody was upset that I was carrying Edward's child despite how it was conceived, and with the exception of Rosalie everyone seemed purely happy to meet me.

I had placed my hand on Edwards knee under the table to reassure him as I turned towards Alice once again attempting to listen to her mindless ramble.

"Alice," Emmett finally interrupted her, and I was surprised we could understand him as I watched as bits of mood flew from his mouth as he spoke, "give it a rest will ya? We don't have to figure it all out tonight! Plus, you're taking our attention away from the guest of honor," he nodded towards me than winking. I wished he had just kept stuffing his face as suddenly everyone seemed interested in me as if I had just told them I had something to say.

"Do you have any names picked out for the baby?" Rosalie finally spoke, and I was somewhat thankful for the break in silence. I couldn't help but notice the envy in Rose's voice.

"No, not yet," I admitted, "I haven't really thought about it much."

"Figures," Rosalie sneered, and Emmett turned to her as he put down his fork.

"Please don't start Rose, not tonight," he said quietly under his breath for only her to hear, but due to the immense silent surrounding us we all heard.

"Do what Emmett? I'm just asking her a question."

"Rose…"

"Emmett, it's just a simple fucking question!"

"Rosie, baby please."

"Don't Rosie baby me, I want a fucking child Emmett Aaron! Maybe if you hadn't stuck your dick in so many girls in high school I wouldn't be sitting here jealous of the open legged drunk queen over here! One night Emmett, ONE NIGHT is all it took her!!! I've waited three years…" suddenly she broke into a sob as she pushed back from the table running from the room.

Emmett placed his head in his hands for a second before looking at me, "The doctors are trying something new with me. I'm fucking trying for her," he whispered, and I realized he wasn't looking at me but through me talking to no one in particular as a wave of sadness washed over his entire posture. Carlisle cleared his throat and suddenly Emmett snapped back into reality as he looked straight into my eyes, "She didn't mean it. She just…" he trailed off and I only nodded at him.

"It's okay, I understand…" I was surprised my voice didn't fail me as I realized tears had begun to pool in my eyes. I cleared my own throat before standing up as Edward placed his arm on my elbow. I looked down at him, trying to smile to reassure him, but his frown only deepened, "I just need to use the restroom," I said before pulling my arm from Edward's touch and walking slowly from the room.

Once in the bathroom I quickly splashed water on my face as I willed myself not to cry. Why was I being so emotional, it's not like anything Rosalie had said hadn't been true. Plus she was right, it wasn't fair. Someone like her had been trying to so long to have a baby, and after one drunken mistake on mine and Edwards part we were now delving into the world she longed to be in.

_Maybe_, I thought to myself, _if I do stay away from Edward after I have the baby I can give it to Rose. Than Edward can still have the child around but not feel forced to commit, and Rose will have everything she ever wanted._

I smiled at my good idea, at least than I would know my child was always safe even if I somehow ended up back in Chris's hands. I looked around at the exuberant bathroom, and my child would never have to want for anything. He or she could have everything. Everything I couldn't. A normal, functional, loving family. If I could give my child nothing else, I wanted it to at least have that.

Edward gently knocked on the door, and I sighed. Now to figure out how to get myself away from Edward. I was already far too attached to him.

"Bella, are you feeling alright? Look I'm sorry about Rose, let's just go home okay? You need to get some rest."

_Home._

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EPOV

Bella was quiet the entire ride home, and inward I was seething at Rosalie. I could tell that what she had said had truly upset Bella. She had tried to act as if it was nothing, but everyone at the table could tell that Bella had been cut deep by her words. Though none of them knew her past, I couldn't knock them, but it didn't stop the overwhelming feeling of anger towards Rose.

We walked quietly up the stairs, and I wished that Bella would just talk to me. Even if to yell at me and tell me she hated my family. I didn't like this silence, I didn't like the look on her face. Seeing it, I knew already that I would obliterate anyone who could create such a look again. I unlocked the door, and moved aside to let her in as she brushed past me.

I grabbed a glass from the shelf, and filled it with water. I took a large swig as I heard noise in my room. I walked in halfway, leaning against the door as I watched Bella in a flurry throughout the room. She grabbing the things we had just brought over that morning and shoving them into a bag, tears streaming down her face.

"What are you doing?" I asked more nonchalantly than I felt as my heart race quickened at the thought of her by herself.

"I have to get out of here Edward, this isn't right. We can't be right. We're too different!" She screamed, her eyes bulging out as tears gushed from her eyes.

"Bella, calm down. Lets talk about this. Come on now, Rose didn't mean it. I'm sorry we never have to see them again," I blurted out all in one breath as I moved slowly towards her my hands outstretched. She stopped moving to look at me, tears still falling, so I continued, "I need you," I whispered, afraid of my own voice. I reached her and wrapped my arms around her as her tears spilled onto my shirt.

"You aren't any of those things. You're everything I need. Don't leave."

It was as if I broke something in her as sobs began to wrack her and her arms shot up and gripped my waist tightly.

"I…don't…wwwant…to leave…you…but it's…unsafe…," she looked up at me through wet lashes. I kissed her forehead as she leaned into me. .

My lips slowly met hers as we begin to kiss softly. Her hands traveled up as her fingers tangled in my hair. She pressed her body closely to mine, and my body responded accordingly.

"Edward, please….touch me….I need to feel…" her words broke off but I knew what she wanted She wanted me to make her feel what I said. She wanted physical proof from me, and I would happily oblige.

"Are you sure?" I asked pulling away as I panted slightly, not wanting to push her to far despite what she had said. Instead of answering she pulled my face towards her once again, this time her kisses more eager.

I backed us slowly towards the bed, as Bella's knees buckled after hitting the edge of the mattress, and I gently laid her on the soft sheets. I pulled away from her, and she groaned at the absence of my body on hers and I would lie if I said I didn't feel broken by the lack of her warm skin touching mine. I unbuttoned her jeans slowly as I slid them off her waist, revealing her gorgeous long legs to me. I pulled her shirt off, and she blushed at the exposure to me, but didn't try to cover herself. I marveled at her gorgeous skin tinted slightly with pink as she laid half naked before me in a lacy black bra and panties.

Gulping, I continued on. "You're gorgeous," I whispered seductively into her ear and I felt a shiver run through her body. I began our slow kiss again as my hands caressed her skin gently. I ran my fingers down her ribs and across her stomach. Her skin was smoother than satin and I wondered if my rough hands felt uncomfortable to her, but she moaned slightly.

My lips left hers as I began to kiss down her neck, stopping to suckle it gently right below her ear and she seemed to appreciate it as her fingers dug slightly into my shoulders. I kissed the exposed skin on her breasts as I felt her breathing increase rapidly.

My fingers worked on the clasp as I released her breasts from their captivity as they moved freely in front of my face. I tried to swallow, not wanting to lose control. I was trying to make Bella feel something, and it wasn't to make her feel rushed. My hand moved up as I palmed her breast, she gasped a moan fell from her lips.

My lips returned to hers, as my other hand roamed freely across her stomach, my hand coming to rest on her waist as I slightly applied pressure to her hip bone with my thumb causing another moan to escape her lips.

I felt her fingers trembling as she moved them around to the front of my chest her fingers fumbling with the buttons. Once all of the buttons were free she placed both of her palms on my chest as she pushed the shirt to the side and down my shoulders. I didn't want to break the contact with her, so I quickly threw off my shirt as my hands moved back to her body.

Her hand moved between us as she rubbed my erection through my jeans. It was so sexy my eyes momentarily rolled back in my head as I groaned into her mouth. She pushed against my chest, and I wondered if I had gone too far or somehow made her uncomfortable.

Surprising me she pushed me onto the bed as she straddled my hips and I felt my erection grow even harder, which I hadn't even thought could be possible. Her lips crashed into mine, much more forceful than my kisses had been, but I knew I would happily give her whatever she wanted. Soft, rough, anything.

Before I could gather my thoughts I felt my erection pop free in the cold air as her fingers traced tiny lines on the shaft. I felt a sharp intake of breath as my eyes threatened to close but I kept my eyes trained on Bella.

Such a sexy little vixen with her hair impossibly sloppier and hotter, her face flushed from arousal instead of embarrassment. Her eyes were dark and hooded, I could hear her breathing, and possibly her heart? Her breasts swayed attractively with every move she made as she licked her lips before biting her bottom lip, making my dick twitch.

Her fingers traced soft lines down my chest and it took all the control my body held not to fuck her senseless as she screamed my name repeatedly. My hands rested on her hips, but she rested her hands on top of mine, causing me to squeeze her hip bones lightly again. So she liked that, I smiled inwardly. She pulled my hands from her hips than as she helped me feel her up.

Our hands together glided over her sides and her stomach before coming to rest on both of her breasts. Her hands tightened as she made me fondle her breasts, not that I was complaining or anything, and I stared amazed at our hands working together. She let my hands go then, as if giving me permission to continue on my own as I gently pulled on her nipples.

I felt her bottom half grind into my own groin, feeling the heat coming from her. I wanted to be inside of her so badly, and she seemed to sense that as she lifted herself from me to remove the final piece of cloth that was keeping us from being fully skin to skin.

Her hand wrapped around my cock as she lowered herself down onto it. She placed the head inside of her slightly, and I nearly cheered at finally being where I wanted when she pulled away. She repeated the act, allowing it to press into her slightly deeper before pulling away again. What the hell?

I concentrated on her face and noticed the smug smile, and realized she was teasing me, _on purpose. _My hips tried to involuntarily buck, but I kept them from moving. I had to move at Bella's pace, which was maddeningly slow right now.

Suddenly she dropped onto me fully as stars shot across my eyes, my dick twitching again inside of her as she moaned. I nearly lost it right then, but thankfully she didn't move as she adjusted to me allowing me some time to regroup.

Her hands were on my own again as she pulled my hands back to her hips. She held them there as she slowly moved up and down on my shaft, causing my eyes to roll back into my head. Her hands left mine, but I repeated the action and watched as her hands moved up to her breasts as she began to knead them herself. She moaned as she pinched her own nipples, trying to thrust down harder on me and I lost it.

I began to drive myself into her my hands on her hips pushing her down on me, as she moaned and panted hungrily. I tried to focus on anything to keep me from losing it before she got her own orgasm, but she certainly wasn't helping me.

Before long she was moaning sentences and words that made my dick even harder inside of her.

"Ungh, Edward….fuck it feels so good….harder, fuck me harder…..oh god EDWARD."

One of my hands left her hips as I moved it towards her center, flicking her clit between my fingers and I felt her begin to tighten around me. Her words became more frantic as she began to repeat the same things over and over again.

"Edward…fuck me….Fuck…Edward"

She leaned forward as she thrust herself harder onto my cock and I captured a nipple between my tongue and teeth causing her to entirely lose control. I felt her tighten around me as I felt my own release shot into her. Her fingers dug into my chest, causing me to come again. Holy shit, she just made me have a double orgasm. I wanted so badly to keep my eyes on her, but they forced themselves closed as she continued to ride me as her own orgasms ripped through her body.

Finally she collapsed on top of me, exhausted and spent. She rest her cheek on my chest as I brushed the hair away from her face. My other hand rubbed circles on her back, and it wasn't long before I heard the sweet sounds of her snoring on top of me. I was still inside her, but I felt myself slowly slipping out of her as I softened. I wished I could somehow stay there in her warmth. I pulled the covers over us as I kissed the top of her head.

I lay there thinking for a while, as I listened to the sound of her breathing. Everything in my world felt perfect and right in those moments. I sighed heavily as I nuzzled my face in her hair.

"I'm falling in love with you," I whispered frowning, as I hugged her tighter to my chest willing the nightmares and memories to leave her alone for one night.

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Can I just say, the first part was written DAYS ago, but I had troubles writing the lemony part. Not because I wasn't inspired, but I had Domward on my mind. As hot as he is, I'm not sure our Bella can quite handle this, at least not yet. She's broken enough as it is, don't need Edward going all handcuffs and whips on her.

Also I've been wanting to tell you this was delayed, and that it's going to be hard to update as often because of school ending in a couple weeks and all, but I refuse to just shove an A/N in your face with no chapter. I hate those updates, and find them cruel. Instead I think I will refer you all to my Live Journal {I am Jezzeria88} so that when I need to tell you something I can just put it there and hope that some of you will read it.

Also, reviews make lemons. Truefax. Wasn't planning on any lemons until I got such a good response on that last chapter. Although I can't make it a regular common occurrence, I can sure try my damnedest to get you guys as many as I can!!!


	8. Imperfect Ending

All characters are own by SM, I'm just playing with them like Barbies.

You know, sometimes I feel like I'm a failure to this world because I can't live up to every ones expectations of me, and than I write a new chapter and you all are here supporting me. And I dunno it comforts me to know I can do something right, even if it is just writing a fic.

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BPOV

I woke up the next morning finding myself unable to move. It took me a moment before I realized Edward's arms were still wrapped around me. We hadn't moved the entire night. I wondered if he felt uncomfortable with me on top of him, and I wriggled slightly trying to get off of him.

He groaned slightly as he clutched me tighter causing me to slide a fraction of an inch down his body, and my eyes grew wide. His morning erection poked me in the thigh, and I tried to suppress a giggle. His hands glided down my back slightly and my breath caught in my throat.

Suddenly I knew how I wanted to wake Edward up. I stared into his sleeping face, as his lips puckered at me and I wanted to devour them. I licked my lips unconsciously as I continued to assess his sleeping form. His hair was even more disheveled from the events from the night before giving him an even more attractive appeal. I had never really noted before how almost perfectly bronzed he was. He wasn't too dark, but naturally a gorgeous tan color.

I could feel my breasts smashed to his naked chest as well as his hands rested right above my butt. I wriggled again, but this time with no intention of getting free. I slid down slightly once more, to have his erection jabbed into my thigh even harder. I continued trying as I closed my eyes, willing his erection to find the spot I was aiming for as I forgot that I was trying to be stealth.

"What are you doing? I heard a husky deep voice ask me and my eyes popped open in surprise. I could feel my blush spread warmth across both of our bodies as he smiled at me, his eyes shining like jewels. I noticed his lips still looked slightly puffed from his sleep and once again licked my bottom lip.

"Why Bella," he asked throatily, "are you trying to seduce me? And in my sleep?"

The blush spread even deeper, as I gave myself away. My face knew no shame, it was always giving away my deepest secrets.

"I was just trying to…uh," I tried to come up with an excuse but was lost in the lust of Edward's eyes as his fingers trailed up and down my spine. All coherent thoughts left my mind as I let out a soft mewl. This only seemed to spur Edward on as he rolled us gently over.

"You know, all you had to do was ask," he said his face only an inch away from mine as he began to suck on my lips.

This time Edward took control, and it was entirely different from anything I had ever experienced in my life. He was so gentle, and caring. He kissed every inch of my skin and I felt as if my entire body and soul was being worshipped by this man. He thrust into me gently and intertwined our fingers as he stared into my eyes.

It didn't even feel like sex, and I was perplexed as to what this was. I didn't feel the need to rush, for Edward to push harder, and I wasn't trying to just get myself off. Which was why I had been glad last night when Edward had let me be on top. It was the easiest way to get myself off.

But this was…something else. After looking into my eyes for a few minutes Edwards lip gently grazed mine and I felt my heart flutter unhealthily in my chest. "Isabella," he murmured and my stomach flopped at the sound of my full name on his lips. Usually I hated when people called me by my full name, but I could listen to Edward say it all day.

I freed one of my hands as I placed it around his neck. He continued to kiss me as I moved my hand to his face while his hand moved gently down my side. I didn't want this to ever end, this was possibly one of the best moments in my entire life.

That thought came too soon as Edwards hand came to rest between us on the side of my stomach, as he rubbed it. It took me a moment, but I realized he was making sure he wasn't hurting the baby. The thought made the corners of my mouth twitch up. Even as he was making love to me he was thinking about our little angel.

Oh my god. Edward was making love to me.

I paid closer attention as Edward continued to worship my body with his own, and found that mine was responding accordingly. Despite our slow movements I felt the tightening in my stomach begin as he once again looked in to my eyes, almost as if he could tell I was getting closer.

"You're so beautiful," he whispered, as he placed kisses on my face, my hand wrapped around his neck.

"So are you," the words fell from my lips before I could stop them. Of course it was probably the lamest thing I could say, but I couldn't regret them too much as Edwards face broke into a gorgeous smile.

"With you I feel as if a hole I didn't even know existed in my life has been filled." His eyes looked into mine as he searched them for something. Was he as afraid as I was? Was he afraid I would reject him and his beautiful words as he made love to me?

"I don't think I ever really existed before you," I murmured as my fingers ran lightly through his hair. He bit his lip, as if to keep from saying something else as I felt both of our orgasms reach their peak.

There were fireworks. Stars. I think I saw God.

Even with all of my past experiences with sex, I had never experienced anything as deep as that and before I could stop myself tears were pouring down my face. Edward looked at me in panic, "Did I hurt you? I'm sorry Bella, I shouldn't have…".

I couldn't stop my tears put I placed my hand over his lips.

"That was just so…amazing. You just gave me the best memory….in my entire life." And his forehead wrinkled as he realized that my best memory was reduced to something to do with sex.

"I'm going to give you a million more to top that," he promised, as a smile broke through my tears.

My stomached grumbled loudly suddenly, breaking the silence.

"Baby's up," I said, as Edward laughed.

"Sounds like he's hungry too."

"He?" I questioned, "Do you want a boy?"

"Doesn't matter either way to me. But I can't just walk around saying 'it' I mean he is our _child._" Edward was right, but until that moment I hadn't thought If I would want it to be a boy or a girl. But even using the term 'it' in thought made me feel bad. Okay so maybe we could refer to our child as him for now.

"Any specific names you prefer?" Edward asked, bringing me out of my thoughts. I shook my head.

"Honestly, that's the last thing on my mind so far. Besides we can come up with them together don't you think?" His grin was contagious as we stared at one another, thoroughly engulfed in one another until my stomach growled again.

"Okay, okay, lets go get something to eat," I grumbled, as I stood up. My knees instantly gave way and Edward caught me before I could hurt myself. What the hell? I tried to stand again, only finding my legs to be jello like.

Looking at Edward with confusion written all over myself I felt angry as he grinned wickedly at me.

"What? I'm crippled here and you think it's amusing?"

He shook his head, "Looks like our morning activities have effected you some." I scowled at him, what did he mean. The orgasm. Shit, I didn't think orgasms could really do that to you! I really have been having shitty sex up until now. Instead of smiling him and now worshipping the ground he walks on I snapped at him instead.

"Shut up lover boy and get me some food."

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EPOV

Bella settled on a bowl of cereal despite my suggestions of something better, but she was persistent. She told me anything more would surely make her sick, and cereal was her best hope of keeping anything down.

My eyes were trained on her lips as I watched them wrap around the spoon, my thoughts instantly turned dirty. Her eyebrows raised as she caught me staring, as she stopped chewing and smirked at me.

"What, you're the one that made me come eat," she said seductively causing me to swallow hard as I turned away from her, trying to focus on anything else.

Somehow I got my mind off the dirty things I wanted to do to Bella, and we ended up on the couch. We told one another more about ourselves.

Bella opened up to me more than before and I stared in awe at the amazing woman before me. My mind could hardly fathom all of the things that she had endured in her life. A few times my eyes filled with tears, wondering how anyone could let something so horrible happen to this amazing woman.

Yet still she seemed positive, still throughout it all she had found a passion for her life that she was now living. She showed me more of her work and I was left breathless staring at pictures that made me feel as if they were fabricated. Even despite everything she could still see the world for all of it's beauty, and I admired her for that.

I wanted to hold her in my arms and never let her go. Never let the world hurt her again, but I knew I couldn't do that. Even in our talk she told me of her fears of being with me. I could see her desire to leave a few times, as she felt me get closer to her emotionally. I knew at any moment I could push her too far and she would be gone forever.

She told me her fears of Chris coming for the two of us, and I assured her I would never let anything happen even if he did find us. Bella just looked around the room nervously, and I knew she didn't believe me. How powerful was this guy exactly? Part of me feared that he would find her at least and hurt her, but I told myself I couldn't think like that. If something were to happen I would deal with it then.

I also told Bella more about myself, and what it was like to grow up with Alice and Emmett. I noticed the envy in her eyes as I told her of scrapes and bruises, and my family ties. I wanted to stop, I didn't want her to have to feel that, but she pressed me for more stories and I couldn't help but oblige.

Bella also asked more about Rosalie, and I told her about when I had first met her. We had been in high school and she had a huge crush on me. Eventually she had met Emmett and fell madly in love with him, so that crush was quickly squashed.

"I used to tell Rose that I never in my life wanted to be in a relationship. She used to tell me we could have kids and how beautiful they would be. I always knew that was the one thing she wanted, but I never ever wanted kids…well until you that is," Bella stared at me as though she didn't believe me but I continued on.

"Really though, before you even showed up on my door step. After that night together, ALL I could think about was you. I thought about what it would be like to marry you, have kids, grow old…" my voice trailed off as I watched Bella blush as she stared down into her lap.

"Anyway, I think Rosalie is just jealous. Like I said, she's always wanted children, and the fact that now I, someone who told her I would rather gouge my eyes out than have a kid, is now having a child with you…which to her is random, just makes her jealous. Don't get me wrong, I know she's entirely in love with Emmett, but she likes everything to be about her. So she figured if I didn't want that kind of relationship with her I wouldn't want it with anyone." I listened to myself babble, and quickly shut my mouth as I stared at Bella.

It felt like minutes passed before Bella finally looked up at me, "It's understandable…" she begin, and I wanted to argue with her, thinking that she was talking about Rosalie's behavior.

"I mean I would be jealous too…" her voice was soft, and I stared wide eyed at her. She wanted me to herself! I didn't know what to say in response, afraid anything might set her off to leave.

"I'm so scared, Edward. I'm scared of Chris, I'm scared for the baby…I'm scared to feel this attached and safe and just close to you! I'm never this vulnerable, but with you I am. With this baby I am. And now I'm not just putting my own life at risk, but so many others…" tears were rolling down her face as she spoke.

"I wish I could take your fear away," I admitted, not sure of what else to tell her. I wrapped her in my arms tightly, as she clung to me.

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Bella was exhausted and fell asleep quickly after our long talk, and I had carried her to our bed kissing her stomach softly before leaving the room. I turned my laptop on quickly and stared off as I waited for it to load. I wondered if I would be able to find out anything about Chris on the internet, and I thought immediately how panicked Bella would be if she knew. I vowed to myself not to let her find out as I punched in the name in the search engine.

Chris Thompson.

Somehow Bella had let his full name slip, and I scrolled down as I looked for something that seemed, well, anything like what Bella had described. I found nothing, and wondered if maybe that wasn't his real name just in case Bella had ever decided to go to the police.

I scrolled back to the top where I typed in Bella's name. A slew of things came up, and I froze briefly as I stared through the articles. I found even more horror stories about her, and even found a picture of the house where her step father and sister had been killed.

"Edward," a tiny voice said suddenly, causing me to jump and slam my laptop. I looked up to find Bella staring at me quizzically as I clutched my chest in my hands.

"You scared me," I admitted, panting pretty heavily.

"What are you doing?" she asked, probably wondering why I was acting like I had just been caught doing something.

"Just catching up on some work," I lied, as she furrowed her brows, "I guess I got caught up, and you startled me." She didn't seem entirely convinced but shook her head.

"Why aren't you sleeping?" I asked, her nap hadn't been more than forty five minutes and I knew she was tired by the dark circles under her eyes.

"I got sick and then I couldn't….I couldn't sleep without you there." I smiled crookedly at her, as she stared at me guiltily as if she had just admitted to breaking a dish.

"I'll come hold you," I said, setting the laptop on the table as I headed towards Bella. She sheepishly followed me as we both wrapped ourselves in one another and fell asleep.

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BPOV

I knew Edward was keeping something from me when I walked into the living room. His face went completely pale, and I wondered what he had been doing. He had said he was doing work, but I knew by the look in his eyes that he had been doing something else.

I tried my hardest not to fall asleep once in Edward's arms, and as soon as I heard his soft snoring began I shrugged out of his embrace and walked out to the laptop. I stared at it as if it had offended me, and wondered if I should open it or not.

What would be the worst thing I could find? Porn? His work? I sat down on the couch as I brought the offensive item into my lap.

I heard a creak, and flipped around, expecting to find Edward there, angry with me for invading his privacy, but realized quickly it was the neighbors door closing. I sighed, as I closed my eyes and threw open the screen.

I shook my leg anxiously as I waited for the damned thing to load. It seemed to take hours, and I kept glancing at the bedroom door every ten seconds, afraid Edward would waltz out knowing what I was doing.

Finally the computer loaded and the page popped up that Edward had just been viewing. I stared shocked at the picture of my house. The house that I hadn't seen since Angela and Phil's death. Why was Edward looking at this? Oh God, what if he was working for Chris? What if I was falling for someone who was just going to take me back to my captor? Oh crap, and I had just told him almost everything. EVERYTHING. Chris would surely have my head for that.

I heard the bed creak, and shut the laptop quickly, jumping off the couch and rushing into the kitchen. I started grabbing items out of the fridge to cook as Edward walked out.

"I thought you were tired," he asked, worried. I stared at his beautiful face, and I wanted to believe he was a good guy with everything in me, but I knew he had to have been hired by Chris. Getting away from him wouldn't be easy now.

"Yea, I am, I just got hungry," I said, nodding towards the contents on the counter. Edward came up and wrapped his arms around me, and I tried my hardest not to break into tears as the already familiar feeling of security tried to wash over me.

"You should've told me, I would take you out. You don't have to cook," he said as he nibbled my ear, but I just continued on with what I was doing without another word. I would never be allowed a happy ending.

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Eh slightly shorter than the rest but oh well. Next chapter goes to beta for sure.

Of course on my day off all I wanted to do was sit here and READ fics, but I know you all want me to update.

Also lets start the voting, do you want the baby to be a boy or a girl?

Btw do you guys mind my….jumping around? Sometimes I feel bad, but I feel it's necessary.


	9. Surprise, Surprise

First things first, I wrote a one shot: What in the Ward?! Check it out. Tell me you hate it whatever.

I am posting this entire story on Livejournal now {jezzeria88 find me}. The only difference from FF is there'll be cool picture header things. Read it wherever you feel comfortable. Oh and just remember I do post things on LJ about how the progress of this story is going, so if you're ever wondering go take a look!

Hmm little did I know you would all be so upset that Bella thinks this way. So two things:

No I cannot give Bella a break. If this were a fluffy story well…than I wouldn't be writing it most likely. But there is a story of love and trust here, and while it seems the odds are always against these two I do promise a hea. I think I've said this before, so endure darlings, endure!

Second, I'm sorry you are all so upset about Bella's crazy idea about Edward, but I must remind you that we still really don't even know the half of her past.

However I do appreciate all of your comments, concerns, and helpful feedback!

Also I plan on this story being at least 30 chapters, when this is posted we will be at 9...that's still 21 chapters at least, and you honestly can't expect it all to just be fluff and happiness!

Oh and I will reiterate, Bella's life sucks. Like big sucks. And no I have not lived this life. But I have come across a lot of people with shitty life's so somehow this is just my compilations and own twists. I cry for Bella, true story, ask my boyfriend. Because as sick and fucked as it is, horrible things like this happen to everyday "bellas" all the time.

{sorry about the ridiculously long A/N}

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EPOV

The next month passed in a blur. Bella and I were in and out due to our jobs, but we constantly found time to spend together as we discussed our days. Bella continued to share with me her works, and I showed her plans for some future buildings. She had asked me if she could possibly document the building of one of my upcoming projects for her portfolio and I happily agreed. Anything to spend just a little bit more time with her.

She started to show slightly, and I was loving the tiny bump that had formed between her hips. Every chance I got I was touching it, or talking to our child. I had never understood the meaning of being on cloud nine until now.

I noticed after our talk that Bella had been acting strange, and I wondered if it she was scared about being so open with me. But no matter how weird she was during the day, and how much I felt her trying to distance herself from me, at night she clung to me for dear life.

Slowly she opened up more and more to me, and I loved seeing every smile form on her face. She would bring me lunches at work, and always somehow ended up making me laugh. Every time I heard her voice my head would spin. I was falling fast and hard and it was out of my control.

So quickly she had become my everything, and somehow I didn't see it coming. Didn't see the hurt in her own eyes. I didn't see anything. I was blinded by my own emotions.

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BPOV

Thoughts raced through my head at a million miles a second after finding what Edward had been keeping from me. I hoped that he would admit he had looked those things up, I wished he would tell me what he was trying to achieve, but he hadn't.

I desperately wanted to believe him. I wanted to crawl into his arms and stay forever, but I had fallen for this trap before.

A few years ago I had run away and succeeded as well. I was happy; that was when I first found my photography. It wasn't long before I was making a name for myself, but I was so young and so fucking stupid.

Greg had come into my life like a whirlwind. He promised me the world, he praised my pictures. He told me he wanted to keep me safe, but I was so scared I kept everything clammed up inside of me. We saw each other for months, and every day I found myself falling more and more for him.

He opened doors for me; he kissed my forehead and brushed the hair out of my face. The stupid little stuff that makes you feel like the most important thing in the world. Somehow he finally got me to tell him my life story. He was angry, and wanted to protect me and I was thrilled. I thought if Chris tried to come back into my life at least Greg would be there. He would do everything to keep me safe.

Greg even proposed to me. Took me to the most expensive place in town, took me for a walk by the river and it just happened to be a full moon. Everything was gorgeous and perfect. He even cried when he got down on his knee and told me he wanted me to be his everything. "You are my life now," he had told me, and tears had gushed from my eyes. Finally I had found my happy ending.

How was I supposed to know that that night I would be "abducted" by Chris, only to watch as he praised Greg. He told me he never loved me. I had never been anything to him but a damn job. It took nearly to build that trust and that relationship and only a matter of two seconds to shatter my life worse than it had ever been.

They had proceeded to rape me, and I felt every last shred of hope and dignity leave my soul then. I was a nothing and a nobody, destined to be miserable for the rest of my life. It was at that moment I decided to just succumb to Chris. I took his drugs, I cooked his meals, I fucked his friends. I told myself I did it because I loved him. Because this was the closest I would ever get to my happily ever after. I'm fairly sure I would still be there, or dead, if he hadn't pushed me down those stairs. If he hadn't killed the only thing that would be my happiness; my first child.

I ran again, and I only looked back to make sure nobody was following me. So now here was Edward, he knew nothing of my life, but he was researching my life for some reason. Why? To find out where to hit me where it hurt the most? I had told him my deepest hurt and now it would come back to haunt me.

I wanted to hate Edward, I wanted to run and tell him I could never believe his lies. I wanted to tell him that no money was worth it and Chris would end up killing him just like he had killed Greg. Because none of the men sent to get me back mattered, they were only relevant until I was in Chris's possession again.

The more I tried to distrust Edward the more I trusted him, and it confused the hell out of me. His eyes softened when he saw me, he grew protective over me when people were too close. It seemed as though when I became panicked that Chris was around, Edward too was searching for a face he would not be able to recognize anyway.

I also couldn't ignore the overwhelming safety I felt once in his arms. One arm would wrap protectively around me while the other would rest on my stomach. I felt as if Edward were silently telling me he was going to protect me and our child, and I clung to that at night. It helped me sleep, and god knows my body needed it.

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It was nearly a month and a half since I had been staying with Edward, and I was nearly five months pregnant, already. Thankfully the sickness had ended, but was now replaced with the overwhelming urge to consume everything in my sight.

I was in the middle of stuffing a cracker into my mouth when Edward walked in. I couldn't help the smile that came across my face as he immediately walked up to me placing his hand on my stomach as he kissed my forehead.

"How're my two favorite people?" he asked, and my only response was another smile full of crumbs as I continued to munch away.

"So I've been thinking," he began, and I stopped, wondering if he was going to tell me to go home. The thought made my stomach churn more than the thought that Edward was working for Chris. I could still imagine the last night I had been there, and I felt the panic rise in me as I waited, completely still, for Edward to finish his sentence.

"You're here all the time, maybe you should just move in," he asked, his face showing the uncertainty of it all. Did he think he was going to scare me off by asking this? I thought about living with Edward, our stuff co-mingling. It did frighten me, but not to the extent of running. But if he asks you to marry him, my conscience thought, run like hell!

I swallowed the remaining cracker in my mouth, and suddenly my mouth felt like the Sahara desert in the middle of August. I licked my lips, as Edward stared anxiously at me awaiting my answer.

"Ok," I managed as Edwards eyes shot up in surprise.

"Really? Okay Bella, I promise I'll give you space if you need it. I'll do anything to make this work, I just can't stand to think of you ever having to go back there again," he seemed to say without taking a breath.

"I'll go over there now and see what else I need. Most of the stuff is rented anyway," I said as I headed towards Edward's…no….our room to put on some shoes.

"Great, just let me change really quick and we'll go!" Edward replied giddily and I froze.

"Actually…is it alright if I go alone? I have my phone on me; I'll call you if anything goes wrong…" I said, just needing a little time alone to process this. Edward's face looked concerned but he said that would be fine before he headed into the shower.

I climbed into the car and began to think of life with Edward. The more I thought about being able to see him every day for sure, being able to bring him his lunches, and our random afternoon walks in the park I couldn't help but feel excited to be moving in. If Edward was working for Chris, then who cares? Even if this was fake happiness, for now I would take it.

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I walked into my apartment, a smile still on my face from my thoughts of Edward and I instantly froze, sensing someone was in the room with me.

"Isabella," a voice snarled from the corner and my stomach immediately dropped. Oh god, this had to be my imagination playing a trick on me, this couldn't be real right now.

"Do you know how long I've been waiting for you?" the voice snarled again and I could hear Chris moving closer to me and I feared what was going to happen.

"You know how much I like waiting, don't you?" He demanded, but my eyes were trained on the floor, I knew better then to speak right now, "DON'T YOU?!" he screamed, and I nodded my head vigorously as he grabbed me by the back of my hair yanking my face close to his.

"You smell like shit. You've been shacking up with somebody haven't you? You little slut. You're getting fat too," he stated before shoving me roughly to the ground. My hands instinctively wrapped around my stomach as Chris stared wide eyed at me, stalking forward making me cringe.

"So you really are a slut. Pregnant again? Your first little mishap didn't teach you? Trash like you doesn't procreate, Isabella." I swallowed thickly, as Chris's boot was on my chest now pinning me to the floor.

"Who's the little bastard's father?" he asked, and I felt myself grow bold now. Well if we were being honest, might as well let him know I was on to his little game of cat and mouse.

"You should know," I snarled, all of my hatred seething from my pores, "You hired him. Just like Greg."

His laugh sent chills down my spine as he inched his face closer to me.

"Really? First time you run, yes I hire someone to bring your stupid ass back. Second time? Well that's a whole different story. I have to come take care of you myself. Is this what you wanted Isabella? For me to have to come hunt you down like an animal? Do you want to die like Angela?" He demanded, his sour breath clouding all of my senses as I felt the familiar constriction in my chest at the mention of my sister.

I felt the tears well in my eyes, Edward wasn't a bad guy. He was my good guy, like I had suspected. He was my savior, and I had made him stay home. I had been afraid of him, and now he was probably the only one who could actually help me. I scoffed at myself, oh the irony of it all. Couldn't I ever get it right?

There was no chance of me being able to call him now, and I wondered briefly if he would even bother to come look for me. I knew he would, and I felt frightened, almost wishing he wouldn't. Chris would definitely kill him. It was one thing to watch Greg die by Chris's hands, but it would be another to watch an innocent man who truly cared about me die because of my own stupid fate.

"Please," I heard myself beg, "let me call him. Let me call the baby's father and let him at least think I'm leaving him! He'll come looking for me if I don't, you could get caught," my voice threatened to quit then but I pressed on trying to play Chris for all he was worth in his drug induced haze, "We could get caught. I was afraid of my love for you Chris, that's why I ran. But I'm not now, I can't stay away from you." I wanted to burn my tongue from my mouth for even saying it, but I saw the wheels turning in Chris's head as he thought over what I was saying. Lust was filling his eyes as he looked over my body.

"Even with that fat on you, you're still sexy. Always have been. You little sex devil," he said, his hands creeping across my body in an all too rough manner.

"I know baby, I know," I said, trying not to choke on my own words, "that's why I have to make sure that scum doesn't come looking for us." I wanted to cry at having to call Edward scum, but I could tell my advance was working as Chris's hands became more fervent, "Then you can have me all to yourself…however you want."

"Five minutes," he growled ripping my phone from my pocket, "and then I destroy this phone and you're mine again."

I picked up the phone and noticed my hands were shaking, reminding me of the fear I had felt when Chris had first taken me. I tried to calm my sobs as I listened to the phone ring. I prayed Edward wouldn't answer, I wasn't sure I would be able to control my voice and he would know something was wrong. I couldn't hurt Edward any more then I already had to.

He answered on the third ring, and I felt my throat tightening and I briefly considered yelling and begging him to help me. I quickly swallowed that thought down as I began to speak.

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EPOV

My phone rang, and my heart pounded harder as I saw Bella's name pop up on my screen. She had said she would call if something was wrong.

"Bella," I answered unable to contain the control in my voice. It was silent, and all I heard was labored breathing. _Please be okay, please be okay_, my mind chanted as I repeated her name more frantically this time.

"Edward," she breathed, and I could tell she had been crying.

"Bella, are you okay? I'll come get you, tell me what's going on." I was fully frenzied now, and I couldn't understand why- all she had said was my name.

"Edward, this just isn't going to work. I can't give you what you want."

My mind reeled at her words, "What, Bella? Are you alone? Is someone there? Is someone making you say all this?"

"Yes, Edward, that's why I'm saying. This is over," she continued as if I hadn't said anything, and I realized she had answered my question.

"Is it Chris, is he there?" I demanded, as I felt my blood begin to boil.

"Yes, Edward. I've just been using you. Don't try to find me. I won't be at my apartment."

My heart plummeted and I knew she had hung up on me then. Chris was there; what was he going to do to her? She had told me she wouldn't be at her apartment, where would she be? I dashed to my car regardless, hoping maybe I could catch them before they left. But what would I do? I didn't care, I realized all that mattered was that I had to get Bella.

I raced down the street, and I felt my anger grow as I seemed to get stuck behind every slow driver and at every red light in the entire city. I continually glanced at the clock on the dash as I ground my teeth knowing I was losing time. Time that was allowing Chris to take Bella away from me, somewhere where I might not be able to find her.

"Fuck, COME ON," I growled, nudging my car to go just a little bit faster.

Bella's apartment complex came into view, and I looked up to her door as I pulled into the parking lot, and saw the front door splayed open. _ Oh god, no, please don't let me be too late._ I didn't even pull all the way into the driveway before throwing my car into park and dashed up the stairs.

I looked inside to find everything over turned but no signs of life. I looked in every nook and cranny of the apartment and found no trace of anything. I saw the broken cell phone on the kitchen floor, and I sank to my knees as I noted the fresh blood stains besides the fragments. My heart shattered as my head fell into my hands and open sobs wracked my body. Bella was gone and I didn't know if I would ever be able to find her or my child again.

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I cry for Edward, he has no idea what's going on. I cry for Bella because she is scared shitless right now.

The next chapter will be Bella's POV of her time with Chris, obviously I didn't kill her, still 21 chapters to go remember!?…possibly a long chapter.

The chapter after that will be Edwards POV and how he tries to handle, deal and cope with this.

The more reviews I get, the faster I'll update. Yes I'm playing that game, sorry guys!


	10. Captured

This chapter will be in BPOV only, the next in Edward's. We'll progress from there as I'm being told this story. I'm sure by the last chapter you are all frantic and possibly angry with me, which is why I am writing this before my previous chapter is even been beta'd so hopefully I can get it out quickly and nobody has heart failure. SM owns all except for my twisted little plot lines here.

To Shanda, I couldn't respond to your review so I'm going to thank you here. Your words made me tear up. Thank you so much.

Oh and I'm sure there will be concern. Yes Bella will be stressed, yes it is bad for the baby, but no, nothing will ever happen to that child. It's a Cullen/Swan and it's a damn survivor despite the stress.

And sorry, this chapter has been done since sunday, and i've been waiting for my beta, but i decided to just be impatient and post this since i don't know when she'll be able to send it back to me. And chapter 11 is already in progress :)

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BPOV

_I could hear the soft murmur of my heart in my ears, and the sound of my breathing. It was calming, no other sounds around me were registering and so I slipped deeper into myself. My heart fluttered as I felt a hand run on my stomach._

_My eyes fluttered open and my smile hurt my face as I stared up into Edward's gorgeous green eyes. He was smiling back and talking to me, but I couldn't understand what he was saying. It didn't matter though, because he was here with me. Touching me._

_I felt his fingers lace in my hair and my eyes shut as I sighed in content. Everything about Edward was calming. I loved this._

_He was laughing now as he pulled me with him. We were at the park, when had we gotten here? I couldn't remember, but I didn't mind. I watched as Edward played with a little boy, they were both laughing and looking over at me._

"_Mommy watch!" the boy yelled, as I smiled at them like they were my entire world. They were my entire world. I could sit here and watch them all day, everyday. They looked so happy and content together, knowing that I was waiting on the sidelines for them. _

_The little boy ran over to me then, and I recognized him as my own immediately. He had Edwards piercing green eyes, and his hair was the same brown as mine. He had that single adorable dimple like Edward, but his lips and nose were much like mine. He was the closest thing I had ever witnessed to perfection._

_I wrapped my arms around him as he stared up at me smiling widely. Edward came over to me then, and wrapped us both in his arms, and I felt safe. I felt at home. He kissed my forehead as the little boy ran off to play. _

_The sky grew darker, until it was black, and my little boy disappeared into the darkness. I panicked, I tried to go after him but I was immobile. Edward promised he would save him as he dashed off behind him, the darkness swallowing him whole as well. A sudden sense of loss overwhelmed me as I struggled to go to them. My legs felt like lead as I slowly moved forwards, but instead of getting closer to the void I was moving further away from it. I could hear both of their voices calling to me, needing me, and I urged my body to move towards them…_

I could hear noise around me as I struggled to open my eyes. My breathing was labored now as the images of my dream continued to play behind my eyelids. I waited for Edward to comfort me like he usually did after my nightmares, but was only greeted by the cold of the room slapping me in the face.

My eyes were finally opened, and I immediately closed them again. The pain that shot through my head was excruciating, and my hands immediately went to my stomach in fear. I hoped that he was okay as I continued to caress the child inside.

"You act like you love the little shit that's inside of you," Chris observed as he leaned against the counter watching me.

"How could I not?" I murmured, and immediately hoped he hadn't heard.

"That's it," he growled as he advanced towards me, "we're getting rid of that thing TODAY!" I turned my back towards him wrapping my arms around my stomach. It couldn't end like this, I couldn't lose another child to him.

"Stop it," I heard a voice say, and I turned in shock to see Chris staring at this woman with the same confused expression.

"Christopher, this child will be carried to full term," I sighed as she continued to speak, and was actually thankful she had walked in, "we'll make a fortune for it on the black market."

My eyes widened in fear, was there really a black market? My inner self scolded me for being surprised, I had long ago realized that nothing was impossible in this world: Chris' world. For now, I told myself to be thankful, but I would try to think of a way to keep him from being…sold. I nearly sobbed at the thought, and quickly turned my head towards the wall.

"Leave us," the voice commanded as tears silently streamed down my face.

"Well Bella, aren't you even going to say hello to your mother?" Renee asked with a sly smile.

"Hello mother," I echoed obediently.

"Now Bella," she chided, "that's no way to thank your mother after saving your bastard child."

"Thank you," I said, trying to make my voice sound more believable.

"You're probably wondering why I had you brought back," she asked, and I felt confusion cloud my thoughts. Why she brought me back? Chris was in charge, Chris had always been in charge.

"Chris had me brought back, not you," I answered, wondering if this was some sort of test.

"Stupid girl. Yes, Chris wanted you back, but I'm the one that let him," she grabbed my hair, yanking my face close to hers and I could smell the garlic and onion on her breath, "I'm in charge now."

With that she released me, shoving me into the hard floor.

"Bella, Bella, you really have made things difficult for yourself," she clucked as her eyes roamed over my features. "Of course you're going to carry this child to term. It'll be worth more then some dead smelly fetus. In the meantime you will earn your keep like before."

"I'll have to drum up new clients for you, although I know some of them won't mind having you back, even if you are pregnant. Don't worry Bells," she said, trying to sound caring like she used to, "the hormones will make the sex easier. Promise."

My heart plummeted at the thought of my body being violated by others, especially while my child was there. He would witness it all. I had to get away, had to find someway out of here. But how could I possibly do that without getting myself killed?

"I have some business to take care of," Renee said as she turned to walk out the door, "don't try anything funny. You are under strict watch."

I felt the tears form in my eyes as I listened to the door slam, but I tried to fight them off as I took in my surroundings. I was in a dark, shabby looking room, which I assumed was some trashy hotel. I had lived in places like these for the majority of my life. The carpet was a dark green color, and as I pushed into it to stand I could feel the years of grime rub up against my skin.

The walls were a pea green, and the comforter matched. It smelled of stale smoke, and I felt bile threatening to rise, but swallowed it down. I had to be strong now, had to think smart.

After walking a few steps I immediately felt wobbly, and sat quickly on the bed. The feeling continued to grow stronger, as my mind seemed to drift into a haze. I felt as if I were in a dream, and I thought I faintly heard the sound of a door.

"This shit really creeps, doesn't it Bells," I heard Chris say, as I turned to see him standing in the corner of my room.

"What," I asked dumbfounded.

"This meth," he said, head lolling to the side, "it doesn't hit right away. It creeps up on you. I take if you've started feeling it."

Shit. Chris had injected me with drugs, of course he had injected me with drugs. My eyes were wide with panic as I tried to grasp at any rational thought to try to help myself.

"Don't find it, just enjoy it," Chris countered, as he begin meticulously picking at his face. "Damnit, I wish I could find that damn bug that keeps crawling on me."

I felt my pulse being to quicken, and I knew that I was just pushing the effects of the drug onto my body further.

"You…bastard!" I screamed, staring wildly at him, as I grabbed to handfuls of my hair.

"Whoa, whoa. Calm down, your baby will live if that's what you're worried about," he said nonchalantly, his fingers still working diligently at what he thought was his "bug".

"How do you know?" I spat at him, angry seeping from every pore.

"Come on. Think logically. Crack babies are born everyday. That little fucks more likely to die from, oh I dunno, you falling down the stairs then anything else."

He smirked at me, I fought the urge to lunge at him and rip out his throat. I wanted to tear him limb from limb, and I would've gladly done it if I had thought I wouldn't get my own ass killed in the process.

I watched as Chris moved closer to me, as tracers fell from his body. What the fuck? Why was I seeing tracers?

Reaching my hand up to brush the stray hair in my face, I instantly felt something sticky. Pulling my hand away I saw the faint traces of blood. I was bleeding too? I returned my fingers to the spot to find it was mostly dry as I turned to glare at Chris.

"I'm bleeding." I stated.

"I know, baby, that's why I gave you the drugs."

"Wait, drugs. As in plural? What exactly did you give me?"

"Well I figured you must miss them, so I didn't know which one to give you…I gave you a little of everything."

"Oh my god, Chris…" was all I could say. I wanted my voice to sound angrier, but the drugs wouldn't allow it as I began to see bright colors and odd shapes all around. The smile on my face seemed to be stuck there as I tried to regain control of my body.

"It's okay baby, I'm just trying to make it better." he said as he pulled me on the bed with him, holding me close to his body. I wanted my body to push away from his, but the sensations of his touch on my skin was amazing. I knew it was the drugs, but I didn't want it to end. I felt the haze begin as I slowly drifted off, vaguely aware that this could be the last time I would ever be conscious. This could be the end for me. Yet still I couldn't find it in me to be upset or angry.

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"_Belly, come on," Angela giggled as she ran across our back yard that had become our makeshift meadow._

"_Gelly," I cried after her, "Don't leave me!" She was so far ahead of me I was afraid I would lose her._

"_Belly," she sighed in her adult tone, "I would never leave you, we're just in the back yard! Now chase the utterflies with me!"_

_I ran excitedly with her now as we captured the invisible butterflies in our tiny fingers, squealing with each catch. I described mine as I caught a blue and purple gorgeous butterfly in my hands._

"_Yours are always prettier," she pouted, crossing her arms in front of her._

"_Gelly, but I catch them for you! See, pretty," I exclaimed, placing my butterfly in her hands. I watched as my sisters face lit up in delight at my gift._

"_Oh Belly, you're the best little sister ever!"_

_Her words resounded in my ears as I saw flashes of her death before my eyes. I wanted to erase those memories from my mind. I wanted to only remember the good times with Angela. I wanted to make new memories with her._

"_No," I sobbed into my hands, "I'm the worst sister ever. I'm sorry Gelly, I'm sorry."_

_I pulled my hands from my face in an attempt to dry my eyes, but stopped when I saw Edward standing in front of me with a child. I reached out to them, wanting the perfect being in my arms, but Edward snatched her back from my reach._

"_No Bella, you can't have us. It's your fault. We're dead, and it's all because of you."_

_With every word he said I watched the two of them melt away. I tried to grab them, but my fingers went through them as if they were only wisps of fog._

"_No, NO!" I screamed, my hand flailing wildly in front of my face, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry," I kept repeating as the tears streamed down my face._

"_This is all your fault," Angela and Edwards voice chorused in unison, "we'd still be alive if you weren't so horrible. So __**stupid**__."_

"_I could have had a life. Maybe I would be married, maybe I would have kids. I could have been anything!" Angela's voice seethed with anger._

"_I could have found someone to love. Someone who could be everything I deserve. You stole that opportunity from me," Edward's voice condemned me._

_They were true. Everything they said was true. This whole thing was my fault. I wish I had never been born._

"_Mommy," a tiny unfamiliar voice said, as I felt my heart clench in anguish, "I could've had a real mommy, a good mommy…I hate you for taking my life from me."_

_That last admission made me want to rip my heart out with my own hands. To try to fix the lives I'd broken apart with shreds of my own life._

"_Bella," Edward was coming towards me now. I stared at the god in front of me, his hair was askew as always. His emeral eyes glistened in concern for me._

"_Bella are you okay?" this wasn't right, it wasn't Edward's voice I heard but Chris's. My angels voice should sound better then that._

"BELLA!" Chris's voice boomed as I felt a sharp pain on the inside of my left arm.

"Jesus, Chris what the hell did you give her?" I heard Renee ask. "If she OD's I will kill you personally," she swore as another sharp pain ripped through my arm.

"Isabella," my mother commanded, "wake up now or your child is already dead as we speak."

I willed my eyes to open and I watched as Chris lowered a cigarette next to where the pain had been. I barely registered two other burn marks in my arm as the fresh pain seared through me.

"Bella," my mother said to me, her face eerily close to mine, "you need to eat something. I can't have you sick for your first customer."

First customer? Shit already? I realized in that moment, I had to get the hell out of here.

_----------------------------------_

In case you don't know, tracers are when you see things as if they're moving in slow motion. They also usually seem to be followed by colors. Kind of like when you move your hand all fast in front of your face, and your fingers look funny…except you're moving at normal speed. Plus the drugs that are effecting her are high hallucinogens and often associated with bright colors.

No I've never done drugs, the worst is smoking pot.

**Oh and I keep forgetting to tell you guys, you can follow me on twitter if you have it: Jezzeria {as if it would be anything else}**

Reviews will make Bella's torture shorter


	11. Waiting

A twofer?! In one day! Yep, I love you that much. This chapter, as well as the next one was just goading me to be written asap. I will try to get 12 and possibly 13 to you by this weekend…but don't hold your breath. I can't make any promises.

I love all of you for your support, it really inspires me to write!

I know you all will be driven slightly mad, because everyone wants to know what's happening with Bella, not Edward, so I'll try to post 12 as quickly as possible.

Thank you Amber1990 for giving me something to read, and for supporting me in my writing, and giving me advice! Best quasi-non girlfriend EVER! {check her out, I mean it, you won't regret it}

I have another story in the works, also angst, but very different from this story. I have yet to put it up because I don't want to lose sight of TR2F so I want to know what you all think…And Amber, shh I know what you think! lol

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EPOV

"Sir, what did you say her name was again?" the annoying operator asked me for the umpteenth time.

"Isabella Swan," I repeated through clenched teeth.

"I'm sorry sir, but there are no records on file by that name."

Fuck, couldn't she have told me that half an hour ago?

"Well she also goes by the name Chloe Bella," Oh god, please have that name on record.

"No sir, I'm sorry but there is no record under that name either." Shit.

"And you have no other way to corroborate your story, sir?" she asked again.

"Come on, this woman is in serious danger! She could be dead already, who cares what her name is FIND HER!" I was becoming irrational now. Slightly psychotic and immensely irrational.

"Sir, I'm going to have to ask you to please calm down," the nasally voice replied, spurring on my anger even more.

"NO I WILL NOT CALM DOWN!!! That woman is carrying my CHILD, and you won't help me!" I yelled before slamming the phone down. God I was getting absolutely no where.

Every since I had come across Bella's ransacked apartment three days ago I had been in a frenzy to find her. Seeing blood on the floor had spurred me on even more, even though I didn't even have proof it was her blood. The police could do nothing to help. After looking in on the scene they had said it looked like a drug bust gone wrong. They treated it as if it were something that happened everyday.

No wonder why Bella never wanted to go to the police.

I growled as I ran my fingers roughly through my hair, I lit up another cigarette as I stared off into nothing. God help me, I was going to search everyday until I found Bella again.

"Jesus Edward, I thought you dropped that disgusting habit," Alice reprimanded as she dropped the grocery bags on the floor and began putting things away. "Besides, when we find Bella, she's not going to want to come home to some disgusting smoke filled apartment."

I narrowed my eyes at her, but quickly extinguished the cigarette knowing that she was right. I would have to call a cleaning company to make sure all the traces were gone so it wouldn't bug Bella.

I had to admit, despite Alice's annoying tendencies, I would not have been able to handle the last couple of days without her. She had seemed shocked, surprised when I told her the jist of what happened to Bella. After she knew, she was pissed. She wanted nothing more then to find Chris and wring his neck, and for being such a little woman I admired her gall.

"Did you call the station back?" she asked, eyeing me carefully.

"Yes, no help, like always." I grumbled, trying to fight off the urge to relight the cigarette.

I fought the images that threatened to cross my mind: Bella being tortured somewhere, Bella dead somewhere. They weren't something I wanted to think about, they were just going to make me more agitated. I hadn't stop beating myself up since I realized Chris had taken her.

I should've gone with her. I should've never let her go alone. Damnit, I should've known!! Shoulda, coulda, woulda. I could feel my teeth grind together at the thought that I had failed at the one thing I had promised Bella as I looked over at Alice. She was on the phone, again. Probably with someone else who wouldn't help.

My hand cradled my head as I thought of Bella laughing at something. I thought about how I missed the sight of her in my kitchen, or the way she wrapped her body around me at night. I would give anything for moments like that back again.

"Edward," Alice interrupted my thoughts as she looked at me with her hands on her hips, "when was the last time you slept?"

I shrugged my shoulders, the last time I could remember sleeping was when Bella was here.

"You need to sleep," she scolded, "promise me you'll try to get a little? Please? I'll keep trying and you're not going to be help to anybody if you don't rest."

"Fine," I said gruffly, but Alice continued to stand there looking at me. "Was there something else Alice?"

"Have you thought about, I don't know, maybe hiring a private investigator?" she looked like a child asking permission to go out and play as she twiddled her thumbs.

"Of course I've thought about it," I said, pinching the bridge of my nose, "but how do I know who we can trust? What if we hire someone who works for Chris?" I realized just how much I sounded like Bella then, and I understood why she was so afraid. He had connections everywhere.

"Okay, well…just think about it." I nodded my head but Alice stood before me as if she had something else to say.

"Just say it," I growled, getting annoyed with her tactics of telling me things.

"Rose wants to help," I glared at her, "she feels really bad for what she said. She just wants to see you happy Edward, and she wants Bella safe."

"Fine, I don't care. She can help if she wants." I snapped, getting up and heading towards my room. I needed to get away from Alice, and at least pretending to sleep would get her off my case.

"I'll wake you if we find anything."

I nodded my head as I headed into my room. I laid down on my bed and suddenly felt wide awake. Turning over on my side facing away from the door, I stared into the semi-darkness wishing I was staring at Bella instead.

The click of the door sounded like a jackhammer and I held my breath laying perfectly still as I listened to Alice sigh in the doorway.

"We'll find her, I swear," she whispered faintly as I felt the tears well up.

How had everything gotten so messed up, things were almost perfect. I closed my eyes, trying to fight away more tears as I thought back to the night before Bella was abducted.

_She had thought I was asleep as she curled her fingers in my hair. It took everything not to fall asleep, especially with her repeated ministrations, but she seemed bothered. Plus it really bugged me that whatever was upsetting her was hindering her sleep._

"_Edward" she had whispered, and I immediately thought she must know I was still awake, but she whispered it again and I realized she thought I was sleeping. "I don't know what to do."_

_Her word were almost enough for me to drop my charade and tell her I was awake, but I didn't, knowing she would clam up._

"_You're so handsome. You have the most amazing eyes that seem to look straight into my soul," I'd be lying if I said her words weren't severely stroking my ego, "but you're too perfect. I don't understand why you're so accepting and caring of me."_

_I was straining now to hear every last word that was pouring from her sweet lips._

"_That's what makes me not trust you…."her words broke and I knew she was crying, "Chris hired someone just like you before to trap me and bring me back, why wouldn't he again?"_

_My head was swimming and I desperately wanted her to explain but she continued on, "I don't want to…not trust you. I want to be able to trust you." She was quiet for a few moments and I thought she was done as I began to mull over her words. She interrupted my thoughts as she once again continued, "I want to trust you…because I'm falling in love with you."_

_My breathing stopped, my heart jumped. Oh. My. God. She loved me. Even though she was unsure of if she should trust me she loved me._

"_You hold the cards, please don't hurt me," she finished as she kissed my forehead, scooting down so she could lay her head on my chest._

_Instinctually I held her closer as I listened to her sigh into me. I wanted to convey all of my feelings towards her through my grasp, and she seemed to understand as she dozed off. _

My eyes popped open and I grimaced when I remembered Bella wasn't by my side.

"You gave me the cards, but I don't know how to play this game," I whispered, tears sliding down my cheeks.

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I walked out to find Alice and Rose around a stack of papers. Glancing at the clock I realized I must have dozed off for a few hours. Rose was staring at me with apologetic eyes, that I was trying desperately to avoid.

"Edward, I'm sor-," she began as I held up a hand to silence her while raking my other hand through my hair.

"Any good news?" I asked hopefully as both women shook their head.

"I'm going out," I announced, grabbing my pack of cigarettes off the counter, "Call me if…anything."

Both nodded their heads, concerned looks passing between the both of them.

The night air felt cool on my face as I walked to my car, pulling a cigarette from the pack. Lighting it, I scoffed at myself. Bella was not going to be happy to find I was smoking again, that is if I find her. I stopped dead in my tracks; _when_, I reminded myself, _when I find her._

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I drove for hours trying to find any clue of Bella. I knew there would be nothing, everything came up clean. Bella was as good at hiding any traces of her as Chris was. I knew Chris had probably taken her far from her, maybe even out of the country. I groaned at the thought, but the fact still remained, I would find her come hell or high water.

My phone vibrated suddenly, causing me to jump as I fumbled to grab my phone. I saw Alice's name on the caller ID as my heart fluttered.

"Alice, what happened? What did you find?" I demanded as I listened to the sound of her brething on the other end, "Alice?…Hey are you there?"

"We still haven't found anything," Alice said guiltily as my hopes plummeted.

"Then why are you -," I began to ask, feeling more then pissed.

"Edward, come home. You can't drive around forever, we all need to sit down and devise a game plan."

"I'm hanging up now," I retorted, what the hell was Alice being so weird for?

"Edward, wait!" she paused seeing if I had hung up the phone or not, "I'm just…scared, and worried. What if Chris is looking for you too? What if he comes here looking for you and hurts Rose or I?"

I sighed, she was right. I couldn't have anyone else I cared about hurt or put in danger.

"Okay, I'm on my way," I said before throwing the phone down on the seat next to me. Was I ever going to get anywhere?

After returning home the three of us wracked our brains for any sort of idea. We were close to throwing in the towel for the night as we sat around my tiny coffee table. Alice was holding a tablet of paper in her lap as she chewed on her pen cap.

"Ugh, there has to be SOMETHING!" she yelled exasperated, her brow furrowing in thought.

*knock*knock*knock*

The three of us stared at one another in eerie silence. Who would be at the door so early?

*knock*knock*knock*

"Edward, get the door," Alice and Rose urged me, their faces pale.

*knock*knock*knock*

"Maybe they'll go away," I said hopefully, trying to force a smile.

*knock*knock*knock*

……..

*knock*knock*knock*

"I guess not…okay," I sighed as I rose slowly, with Alice and Rosalie following closely behind. Damn my door with no peep hole.

I opened it a crack, the chain locked as I gaped out in front of me.

My parents along with Jasper and Emmett stood on my doorstep. They all looked genuinely concerned as my father spoke, "Son, we'd like to help you."

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So all of you may hate me, there's still half a chapter to a chapter before Bella will be out of harms way…I know it's killing you, but I was almost going to make it another two or three chapters so just be glad!

I find it interesting you all want Edward to save Bella. I mean of course I want Bella saved, but….what if Edward can't save Bella? {muahaha, now that's a cliffy if I do say so myself.}


	12. The Great Escape

So I've been feeling lazy even though this chapter has been written in my head for a few days now…Don't be angry with me, this is still a pretty quick update if I do say so myself. Once again this will only be in one point of view. Slightly longer chapter then usual.

So it's almost three in the morning and the only reason I'm writing is because I'm pulling an all nighter for work in a couple hours, so if this makes no sense at all let me know and I'll yank it and rewrite it so it works k? And be honest, don't just say nothing because you want an update. lol :)

I think this is my favorite chapter by far.

Before I give too much away…onward! {btw SM owns all, except Chris. That sick fuck is for you readers to pick apart and beat as you'd like}

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BPOV

I got lucky that night. For some reason the man decided he didn't want me, and I was spared being forced into prostitution. Renee swore that she would find someone to take me, but it had been nearly a week now and she still hadn't had any luck. I was more then thankful for that.

The second night after the drugs wore off I ran into an old friend, Misty. Nobody knew that she was the one who had helped me escape all the other times before. I secretly think she wants to live vicariously through me because she is never brave enough to actually leave herself.

Somehow she talked Renee and Chris into letting just the two of us go to the store that night. She asked me about everything that happened, and cried when I told her about Chris forcing the drugs on me while I was pregnant. She helped me steal a few bottles of prenatal pills, and promised she would come see me daily so she could sneak them to me. I felt so much relief, at least I could try to keep my child as healthy as possibly while these monsters were trying to do otherwise.

Misty seemed enthralled by the idea of Edward, and she often got teary eyed when she told me he would find me someday. I didn't want to let her down, but I still hoped Edward had just forgotten about. My dreams often consisted of Edward, and many days they were the only reason I got out of bed, with the hopes that someday I would find a way to leave again and go back to him. But I knew my dreams were just that; dreams. It wasn't logical, nor was it safe to want Edward anywhere near me. I could never put him in harms way.

Chris had continued to use me as his ashtray when he was angry, and I had small cigarette burns littered across my body. Renee didn't care as usual, as long as it didn't hurt the baby. As much as I hated her, I was thankful she was protecting of my child, even if for her own sick demented reasons. For now I just needed to try to focus on all of the positives in my life.

So now I'm sitting on some dirty floor watching Chris shoot up. He's smiling at me and licking his lips, and I wish he would just go find another one of his prostitutes to molest with his eyes. I squirmed uncomfortably under his gaze, but my discomfort only seemed to egg him on.

"Bells, even with that fat bump right there, you're still one sexy piece of ass you know that?" he said for what I'm sure was meant to be some sort of compliment. "I'd still fuck you baby girl," he slurred as the drugs kicked in and his head fall back against the wall making a loud thud, "don't worry, Renee will find someone who'll still pay to have you."

I cringed at his words because I knew they were true. She would stop at nothing to make some sort of profit off of me until the baby could come. She had made that much clear, after the baby was born and she made her money she planned on killing me. Until then I was just another bill to her, and she wanted her bill to pay itself. And my time was running out, soon I would either have to start hustling drugs again or the day would finally come when Renee found someone who wanted to….have sex with me.

"Isabella," Renee barked. I jumped up at her voice, and tried to ignore Chris's finger tips moving slowly up my bare leg, "go find Misty. Get cleaned up, you have a customer in an hour. Don't lose him."

I nodded eagerly, making her think that I was happy that I could finally pull my weight now. I walked slowly down the dark damp hallways, trying not to breath through my nose and smell the disgusting odor of drugs, death and sex.

Misty's door was closed; that meant she had a customer herself. I knocked once and sat across the hallway staring at the door. My knock meant that Misty would wrap things up in five minutes. We had developed this system over the years so Chris wouldn't get pissed about us wasting our time. Within the five minutes the door opened and a dark man slunk out of the room without even a glance towards me as he stumbled towards the exit.

I walked into Misty's room just as she was pulling on her robe.

"What's up baby bump?" she asked me, as she fixed her hair in the mirror.

"Renee has my first customer lined up. She wants you to make me all pretty for him," I said before I grumbled, "like they really give a fuck what we look like." She smiled at me as we walked over to the bathroom together. Misty turned on the water and began adding the appropriate oils.

Of course I could've done this all myself, Misty and I done this enough times to do this in our sleep. But we always did it for one another because it was a way of strengthening ourselves so we wouldn't feel to berated afterwards. So Renee's distrust of me worked in my advantage in this case.

I smiled as I climbed into the warm water, trying to give myself the same talk I had given myself so many times before.

_This man is scum, he is only using you for your body. You are a strong beautiful person. You will survive this. They can hurt you physically but they can't break your soul._

As I repeated my mantra Misty dipped a wash clothe in the tub and gently scrubbed my skin, being careful of the burn marks. She was whispering her own mantra, that I too would often say for her:_ Dear Lord, keep her safe. Don't give her more then she can handle. Bring her home to me, and if you don't bring her home let it be because she found somewhere to be safe._

I felt the nerves clawing at me but I took a deep breath and shoved them down in the pit of my stomach. Now was not the time to be second guessing myself. Misty looked at me with hopeful eyes as she gently helped me dry my skin.

"You will be safe." she said more like a statement then a question. I nodded at her as I sat in front of the vanity and begin to pull a brush through my hair.

"I always am," I told her as she began to sweep my hair off my neck into an updo that would withstand...whatever it was I was going to be put through today.

"I love you," she said, still not much emotion crossing her eyes as she continued on my hair while I applied a light amount of makeup.

"You will always be like a sister to me. I can never thank you enough," I felt like we were saying our final goodbyes, but I didn't dwell too much on the formality of it all as I heard Chris rap twice on the door. That meant I had five minutes before I was going to be in trouble.

Misty and I stared at one another, so many words hung in the hair unspoken as I shoved my feet into my shoes before opening the door. Chris was leaning against the wall a cigarette between his lips while his eyes were narrowed slightly. If he weren't such a bastard, he could actually be attractive. His high had worn off, and I could see he was in an unnaturally good mood as he smiled at me.

"Ready Bellz?" I nodded at him, plastering the best smile I could on my face as he held his arm out to me, "I've got a good feeling about this one."

He always said that before I met a new client. He only had a good feeling because it made his pocket book fatter, but I could never speak against him.

"Where's Renee?" I asked when I realized he was escorting me out of my hell to the car.

"Eh, queen bitch is busy. I'm you're escort. That okay with you?" he asked as he pulled the door open for me.

"Always," I smiled at him as I stepped into the back of the car, taking a deep breath. It was now or never.

We pulled up to a fancy hotel, and I have to say, even I was impressed. I had never been in such a nice place before. Maybe I was being mislead, maybe I was really supposed to be meeting with the junkie busboy.

Chris escorted me to the elevator, but when I stepped inside, he pushed a button before exiting the elevator. I looked at him inquiringly as he shrugged at me as if this sort of thing happened everyday.

"He wants you to come up alone," my heart quickened as I stood alone in the elevator. I glanced at the lit button and noticed I was headed for the top floor. I felt a flutter of hope as I wondered briefly if maybe Edward had somehow found me and was going to rescue me, but I quickly dashed that. I had to think rational, and having silly fantasies was not going to help me think clearly now.

The elevator stopped with a ding, and I wrung my hands together as the doors slid open. In front of me stood an older man with light brown hair. He had a nice smile, as he held his hand out to me. I felt apprehensive as I gave him my hand following his lead into his room. He closed the door quickly, and I wondered what this guy would be into. Obviously pregnant women was one of them.

"Hello, Isabella," he said to no surprise, all the customers new my name beforehand.

"Good afternoon sir," I smiled at him as he moved towards me.

"Please make yourself comfortable," he offered, watching me intently.

"This is about you sir. Please, tell me what would make you comfortable," I said trying to sound sexy, but felt more nervous then anything.

"There's so many things my wife just won't do for me…where to start?" he smiled slyly at me. I raised my eyebrows in anticipation, I'd heard just about everything before.

"I've always had a fetish….I want you to treat me like a baby Isabella," whoa okay, did not see that one coming. I must have looked as shocked as I felt, because the man instantly turned red in embarrassment.

"I'm sorry, please don't be ashamed. I reassured him, moving closer to touch his arm. I'm just wondering,"_ what kind of sick fuck you are_, "how exactly you mean."

"I want you to put a diaper on me, and spank me like a bad baby. I want you to breast feed me."

Okay, that's why he liked the pregnant woman thing. I fought the urge to punch the guy in the gut and run out, but knew I had to do this, so instead I swallowed hard before I spoke.

"You get ready, and I'm going to go into the bathroom and freshen up okay?" I asked him, as he smiled, nodding eagerly.

I walked into the bathroom, locking the door behind me as I lifted my leg up. I unstrapped the syringe from my leg, as I pulled the tiny bottle of liquid from between my breasts. I sucked the contents into the syringe as I tapped it twice. Well at least this would be easier.

Hiding the syringe behind my back I opened the door to find the pervert in a diaper already crawling on the ground like he was an infant.

"Come here baby," I cooed at him, "come to mommy."

He crawled to me eagerly, drool running down the corner of his mouth. Okay, I was really going to need fucking therapy after this.

"Mommy has to give you a shot baby. So you don't get sick." He began to cry like an infant would as he saw me pull the needle from behind me. Trying to crawl away, I grabbed him by the stomach and hoisted him over my knees, as I pulled down his diaper and began to spank him.

"Be a good boy now, mommy needs to give you a shot," he cried louder, but didn't move and I could feel his erection pushing through the diaper into my news. Um _ew._

Focusing on what I was doing, I plunged the syringe into his ass, pushing all of the contents into his body. He cried for a second longer before he was totally silent and I could feel his dead weight on my lap.

"Baby?" I asked, sure it couldn't have been THAT easy. And of course, it wasn't as he began groggily trying to move around. Well shit, I hadn't thought this rich asshole would be a junkie and be able to handle that much meth at once. Now I was going to have to kill him or some shit.

"What the fuck did you do? This wasn't part of the deal," he said as he tried to stand up, but collapsed back to the ground. I scooted myself backwards as I watched him struggle to get up trying to figure out what I'd done to him.

"There wasn't even anything in the syringe," I tried to tell him as he continued to try to stumble towards me.

"My wife wouldn't do this to me," he said, and I wondered if he meant the baby shit or the drugging him. Because if I was his wife, I would've drugged him a long time ago.

"Are you okay?" I asked, trying to fake innocence, as I stared wide eyed at him.

"I feel weird," he admitted as he stumbled towards his bed, "I think I just need to lie down for a sec-," he began before falling face first into the corner of his nightstand causing blood to begin spurting from a gash in his head. I stood there for a second to see if he was knocked out or not, and when he didn't move I made my move.

I turned on his tv and it was conveniently already tuned into a porno. Figures. I turned it up so that anyone standing outside the door would hear it, as I headed out the door, making sure the 'do not disturb' sign was safely on the handle. Now that I was in the hall I had to weigh the facts.

I was on the 18th floor of a hotel. Chris was downstairs. He would be watching the elevator, but he could have someone in the stairs too…choices, choices. I turned my head and couldn't believe my luck, the maid had left a door open and upon looking inside I found a maintenance elevator. Chris probably didn't know about it, nor would he think I'd have any access to it. I pushed the button and the door opened immediately, the maid must've just gotten there.

Climbing inside I pushed the lowest floor, praying I wouldn't end up near Chris. My heart was racing, and it seemed like the elevator took an hour to finally reach the bottom. I found myself in the basement surrounded by linens. More dumb luck. I quickly stripped off my clothes, throwing on a maids outfit before throwing my own old clothes into the garbage incinerator. Yay for rich hotels that like to burn their trash!

I walked around the bottom for a while, feeling like James Bond or some shit until I found a door. And thank God it opened to the back of the hotel, no where near Chris. I walked quickly down the alley, knowing I still wasn't in the clear. Not until I was as far as I could possibly be from here.

Five minutes later I thrust myself into the bustle of the city around me, and easily pick pocketed a man at a stop light. Thankfully he had a few hundred dollars on him, but I grabbed his credit card quickly before throwing his wallet into the trash. I continued to walk until I found a boy that looked like he could use a decent meal and change of clothes.

"Hey kid, wanna make some money?" I asked him as he eyed me suspiciously.

"Look, I just left my husband, and he won't give me any money. I don't want him to know I took it, so I need you to take as much as that machine will let you take out. I just can't have the camera's seeing me." I pleaded with him with my eyes as he looked at me pondering.

"How much would I get?" He asked, his fingers already itching for the money.

"I'll give you a hundred dollars." I told him, hoping he wouldn't run off with my money.

"Alright lady," he said, plucking the card from my fingers as he walked across the street to the ATM. I watched as he withdrew the money and held my breath as he looked on both sides of him contemplating whether or not to run. But instead he turned around and came jogging back over to me.

"Here ya go," he said handing me five hundred dollars, and I quickly handed one back over to him. He tried to hand the card back to me but I shook my head.

"Keep it," I told him.

I ducked into the nearest store as I quickly bought an entire new outfit. I considered going to a salon and dying my hair, but knew that I didn't have the time and that I couldn't use the die because of my baby. I rubbed my stomach once as I continued to walk towards the edge of town.

"Mommy's getting us the hell out of here," I told him as I watched the sidewalk pass between my feet, afraid if I looked up Chris or Renee would be there.

I pick pocketed a phone off of another person, and I dialed quickly as I kept my pace going forward. The phone rang, and my heart dropped as nobody answered. Shit. I tried again three more times, and panic begin to set in as I wondered if Chris had somehow found out.

I took a deep breath and tried the number one more time, and nearly screamed in excitement as I heard a voice on the other end.

"I need you to come get me, and this is what I need you to do. Hurry."

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Um, sorry just pulled a random fetish out of nowhere….this one is strange and…strange to me. So it freaked me out too, don't think I get off on this shit. Oh and you thought Bella's customer was going to be Edward too didn't you? Ha, like life could be that easy.

And this is why Edward can't save Bella. I guess in a sense he can, but I am very much a feminist {woo girl power and all that good shit} and guys don't need to save us every time.

Review please! Oh and this is not even close to the end, so don't try to leave me now!


	13. Stranger to the Rescue

So I am starting this chapter on really….no sleep. I mean, I always say I'm more creative in the middle of the night when I'm tired, but I am beyond tired so we'll see how this goes.

I am surprised I finished this chapter tonight, but oh well! I like this one too. Maybe writing have dazed is better then writing after having rested! Lol

Oh and Shanda, ATM kid is not in trouble. Haha.

I couldn't discuss details of this with Amber because she's out of town, but I love her anyway because she still inspired it.

My readers are the best because you make me all emotional and shit. I love you all, just so you know!

SM owns everything, she even sold me my ideas…lol kidding!

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EPOV

The phone rang for the what seemed like the umpteenth time and I growled through my teeth as I yelled at Alice.

"Alice, grab the damn phone!" I was on a short leash and I was about to lose it at any second. Everyone was on end as the seconds ticked by waiting to find any sign that Bella had even existed. Somehow I found comfort that my family seemed just as stubborn as I was to find Bella no matter what. The ringing tone of the phone blared in my ear.

"ALICE!" I knew this had to be some kind of important call. Rose and Emmett were out driving around looking for some sign of Bella while Carlisle and Esme were using their influences to try to find anybody else who might be able to help us. Jasper, Alice and I were holding down the fort, so to say, and now the phone was ringing off the hook causing us all to go a little stir crazy as papers were thrown in the air and couch cushions were thrown across the room in an attempt to find that damn phone.

"Damnit, Edward, I just can't find the stupid fucking thi-Oh, Hello?" I heard her say, and I froze as the blaring ring was silenced. "Oh my god, Bella. Are you okay?"

My heart sped up at the mention of her name, and I wished Alice would just hand me that damn phone so I could hear her voice for myself. I stood with my hand outstretched but Alice ignored me as her eyes narrowed in concentration.

"Okay, okay…," I held my breath as I listened to this very undetailed end of the conversation, "okay, we'll try to get there as soon as we can." I blew out the air in my lungs as Alice pushed the button ending the call.

"That was Bella," I stared at her incredulously, I had figured that much. Sensing my annoyance she continued on, "she escaped from Chris. She's walking now and she needs us to come pick her up."

"Okay, great!" I said a flood of relief filling me. She was free, she was safe for now. "Where did she say she was?" I asked as Alice stared at me, her voice void of emotion.

"Hello? Earth to Alice, where is she?" She looked guiltily at the floor as my eyes widened in horror, "Alice where the fuck is she," my voice was growing tense again as I waited for her to say something. Anything.

She mumbled something softly, and I moved closer to her as I asked her to repeat her answer.

"I don't know." she said, looking immediately guilty.

"Okay, well call her back," I said, growing more impatient by the minute, I just wanted to be to Bella already.

"I can't…," she began and I felt my resolve nearly ready to snap again.

"Why the fuck not?" I growled through clenched teeth as Alice's face drained of all it's color.

"She said she would be unreachable on the number and not to try to call back. Oh my god, Edward. How could I forget what she told me?" My heart stopped once again and I clenched my fists at my sides to keep from strangling my idiotic, hairbrained sister.

"You have got to be fucking kidding me. Think Alice, _think_," I urged her, willing her to at least remember the direction in which we should attempt to go.

"I think it's somewhere down south…" she said although I could tell she was unsure.

"Alice, I'm trying really hard not to kill you right now for hopes that somehow your mind will regurgitate what Bella just said. In the meantime we are going to get in the car and start heading south. You are going to call the cell phone company and find a way to track that fucking number. Do you understand me?" I asked, leaning far to close to her.

"Okay," she whimpered as Jasper stepped out of the room. Taking in the expressions on our faces he too looked concerned.

"What happened, who was on the phone?" he asked. I told him I would fill him in in the car as we all rushed out the door, on what seemed to be a wild goose chase to find Bella.

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BPOV

I continued to strut down the road even though there was clearly no body around. I didn't dare look back for fear of the monster that loomed somewhere behind me. No doubt they had figured out I had vanished once again by now, and I knew there would be a mad search party out to find me.

Unless they would let me go this time. I sneered at my own stupidity, knowing that would never be the case. They didn't like to lose, and they would search for me until their dying day. Hell they might even send their kids to search for my kids.

To pass the time I tried to count the sagebrush as I passed it, but quickly gave up. Instead I focused on the vanishing point in the road, and the fact that it never got closer compelled me to keep moving. There weren't even other buildings around, and I wondered if I died out here how long it would take anybody to find me anyway.

I sorted through the cheap bag I had bought, in search of my water as I pushed aside prenatal vitamins and snacks that I might need on the way, along with a roll of toilet paper. _Hey you never know_, I thought, as I shrugged my shoulders. I found my water, but still didn't break my stride as I unscrewed the cap and took a quick swig. I didn't know how long I would be walking before Alice and Edward pulled up, but I wasn't stopping until they got to me. I would walk all the way home if it came to that.

I could almost hear Edward's criticism in my head at exerting myself so much, but it didn't slow my stride. Actually it may have urged me to move quicker. I knew all this stress could be harmful to the baby, but I felt oddly calm. Feeling almost as if the baby understood the impending danger I was saving us from by this exertion. I could imagine my dream baby telling me, "_It's okay mommy I understand."_ and that thought also compelled me to move forward.

There was a child inside of me that was depending on me. That needed me to make him safe again. That needed me to go to any length to keep him safe, and I was doing just that.

My legs felt numb from their dull pounding on the pavement, and I felt oddly exposed. If Chris or any of his people were to drive up this road, I would be right here for them, ready to go back into their arms. But I knew I couldn't leave because then Edward and Alice would never have a way to find me. I wish I could've kept the phone but I knew the owner would cancel it soon, and it would be too easy for Chris to get a hold of that number and be able to track it.

It was even risky that I had called Edward. There was no doubt in my mind that Chris already knew everything about Edward, and he surely would recognize the number on a call list, but I had to talk to Edward. I had nobody else to call, nobody else I could trust. So I took a risk and called. Alice had promised they would be here, and though I didn't have a watch I knew a significant amount of time had passed and still they were no where to be seen.

_Something might've happened to them_, my mind nagged, but I shoved the thought away as I continued forward. God was on my side, He was helping me and I just had a feeling Alice and Edward would get there…eventually.

I heard the sound of a car approaching me from behind and I felt my entire body tense as I waited for hands to snatch me up. My mind concocted the worse case scenarios as I closed my eyes and attempted to walk in as straight of a line as possible. The car whooshed past me, throwing a cool breeze over my sweating form as I let out a sigh of relief. Briefly I wondered if I would have to live my entire life in fear that somehow I would bump into Chris or Renee.

My muscles were still tense in fear, and I tried to think of anything else to try to calm my body so I could continue moving at the same pace.

_Edward_, my mind chanted, already knowing my happy place, _Edward at work. Edward smiling at you. Stolen kisses. Edward pushing lose strands of hair away from my face. Edward laughing. Edward without a shirt. Edward holding me. Edward's hands on my thighs. Edward touching my…_

I stopped my mind, now feeling tense for a different reason. I pulled a granola bar from my bag and munched on it, feeling my pace slow slightly. The sun was starting to set now, and I sighed relief washing over me. At least in the night I would be hidden from plain view.

My mind wandered to my child again as I wondered what traits of Edward and I he would hold. Would his hair be bronzed like Edwards, or would it be a dark brown like mine? What color would his eyes be? Would he have Edward dimples, or would he inherit my annoying blush? I smiled at the different faces that ran through my mind, my heart swelling at the idea of all of them.

I was so lost in thought I didn't even hear the car that was following closely beside me and I felt my heart clench in fear.

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EPOV

After filling in Jasper on the events that had just taken place, both he and Alice had begun to dial different cell phone companies trying to trace the call that we had just received as I sped down the highway. My hands gripped the steering wheel too tightly as I crushed my foot against the gas.

_Bella I'm coming,_ I urged her to be able to hear my thoughts somehow. I knew there was no way she could, but it comforted me to do it anyway. I listened to the banter in the back seat as my family tried to convince the people on the line that they could in fact access the phone information. If I wasn't so tense already I would be laughing at the scenarios they were coming up with to try to get these operators to cave.

Jasper had tried saying he was conducting an investigation but the man on the other end said that he would need the warrant number to be able to give out the information. Exasperated he had hung up and called back, telling the woman on the line some sob story about his dead girlfriend and just wanting some peace knowing where she was at the last time she called. The woman tried in vain, although I'm not sure how she fell for that bullshit because it didn't even make sense, but the search had turned up with nothing.

Alice on the other hand was trying to sexually persuade the man she was talking to, to divulge the information. He had quickly informed her he was gay before hanging up on her. She fumed that she was going to call back and file a formal complaint, but Jasper and I threw her threatening looks and she dropped it, but vowed after we picked up Bella that we couldn't stop her from complaining. Now she was trying to pass as a senile old woman who had lost her phone and needed it tracked to be able to locate it.

"Yes!" she squealed suddenly as she slammed the phone shut, throwing it down in a touch down fashion on the floor board of the car. "We're headed in the right direction Edward, it's about an hour and a half further from her."

I blew out a breath, glad that we finally had a general location for Bella. We had already been on the road for a while and I was beginning to fear the worst. What if Alice had gotten the location wrong? What if we were just speeding further away from Bella instead of closer? But now I knew, we could be to here anytime now. Who knew how far she could've walked by now.

Alice and Jasper began to talk about useless things, and I knew they were just trying to distract me and themselves to try to make the time pass faster. But we all glanced at the clock every couple of minutes, and it felt as if we were getting no where even though we were doing nearly 120 down the road.

My phone vibrated and I jumped, praying it would be Bella. Knowing we were heading towards her was helpful but I needed to hear her voice. Without looking at the caller ID I flipped open my phone and thrust it up to my ear.

"Edward? Where are you? What happened?" Carlisle's worried voice strained in my ear.

"Dad, sorry. Bella called…," I began but at the mention of Bella's name Carlisle and Esme began to ask me a million questions at once.

"Whoa, whoa, I didn't get any of that. Just calm down and I'll tell you all that I know."

After relaying the story to them, they too felt as though they were sitting on pins and needles and offered to follow us down, even though they would be behind us just in case. I told them it wasn't necessary, but that they needed to set up a place we could stay after I got her. I made sure that everything would be set up under different names so Chris would have a harder time trying to find us.

"Oh, and can you call Rose and Emmett too? They're really worried. Rose feel's so bad," I said, feeling guilty that they were probably still searching for Bella when we knew they weren't anywhere close. My parents agreed and told us to keep them posted.

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BPOV

I stared at the people in the car in disbelief, and for the first time in hours stopped my movement as I turned to look fully at the passengers.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, surprised that my voice hadn't failed me.

"Saving you," a voice said roughly, as the passenger door swung open, the person stepping out of the car to allow me access to the back seat. I climbed in gratefully. Our speed quickly climbed as I sat dumbfounded and numb.

"How did you know I would be here?" They couldn't be somehow involved could they? Maybe I shouldn't have gotten in the car.

"We didn't," Rosalie said her voice sounding resentful, "but we were ready to drive across the continental US to find you," she admitted, turning her head slightly to me to smile as best she could.

"Bella I'm really sorry." she said, and I could hear the sincerity in her words.

"It's okay Rose. I deserve it. Besides, it's not fair you guys are trying so hard. I probably would've reacted the same way." She smiled at me, and I realized I liked Rose even if she had been a bitch to me before.

"No Bella, nothing excuses the way I acted…the things I said." I saw her eyes fill with tears, and I felt bad for her.

"Honestly Rose, it's okay. Besides I was seriously considering letting you have the child so that you could have a kid, and I could keep him out of harms way."

She looked at me as if I'd grown another head, but smiled, as she seemed to understand my reasoning.

"He?" she asked after a few minutes, "I didn't know you knew the sex already."

"I don't," I admitted, "but Edward and I decided it was better then calling him an it."

She laughed at that as her phone rang.

"Oh hi Edward. No, we know. How do we know? Well she's in the car with us. Don't ask me how we knew, I just told Emmett we had to find her. We were going to drive across this country if we could. Hell I would've made Emmett drive across every continent if I had to. We just got lucky."

They talked for a few more minutes, and I felt my feet throb below me. My eyes began to feel heavy as I listened to Rose's soft voice and the hum of the car.

"We're glad you're safe Bella," Emmett said quietly, eyeing me from the rearview mirror. I smiled at him, but Rose thrust the phone in my face.

"Edward wants to talk to you."

I put the phone up to my hear, and just hearing him breathe made me heave a sigh of relief.

"Edward," I began, my throat tightening. I was so close to him now.

"Bella, oh my god, I'm so glad you're okay. Bella baby, he'll never touch you again. I'll do anything to make you safe again. I love you. I love you so much."

My head swam as his words engulfed me, wrapping me in a blanket of safety. I couldn't keep the stupid grin off my face as his words replayed in my head, _I love you. I love you so much._

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All I have to say is, DUH it was Edward she called. That was always my plan, and I seriously considered it being someone else because you all speculated it wouldn't be Edward. But I have to stay true to what I'm being told to say so there ya have it.

Hey at least this is a better cliff hanger type thing then the other ones right? Oh and I wasn't planning on Rose and Emmett getting to her first, that one just kind of snuck up on me.

Review, and maybe it'll only take me another day or two to update. Honestly, your reviews encourage me to write you have no idea.


	14. Reunited

Shanda you kill me with all your amazing reviews and no way for me to contact you back!!! I just want to find you and fangirlsqueal at you while talking about girly things until the wee hours of the morning. Please stop being unreachable! Haha. Or if not that's fine too because I just love your reviews so hardcore it doesn't matter either way.

Anywho I loved all of your responses as ALWAYS! You all rock.

Oh also I thought I should tell you all the story of the diaper: I had a friend in high school who dated a guy for three years, and when they broke up she told the WHOLE school how he had a diaper fetish, very much so like Chris's. I recently ran into him, and so I think the thought was on my mind when I wrote that chapter. Haha, strange I know.

Sorry, I planned on this being put up on Wednesday, but didn't quite get to finish it. Then yesterday I had a bone marrow biopsy {don't worry all is well so far} so I wasn't able to finish it up yesterday either. I'll try to make the next one quicker.

So from here to…? There will be fluffy happy goodness…but there is still one more hurdle before we get our hea. Just so ya know!

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EPOV

I paced at the gas station as I waited for Emmett and Rose to meet up with me. I raked my fingers through my hair as I tried to calm my nerves. I couldn't stop the nagging feeling that I needed to see Bella right away. Alice and Jasper were in the store buying snacks as I sighed, jamming my hands in my pockets while I continued to wait.

"Edward, calm down, they're still going to be a while. Candy bar?" Alice asked shoving a wide variety of candy in my face. I shook my head as she shrugged popping a piece of chocolate in her own mouth.

Leaning up against the car I began to pat my legs as if they were drums. Jasper rolled his eyes at me as he walked past me to get in the car beside my sister, "You know it's going to be at least an hour and a half right? You can't do that the whole time."

I pulled out my phone for the umpteenth time as I stared at the screen. Had it really only been fifteen minutes since the phone call that they had Bella? I scrolled down to Rosalie's name as my finger hovered over the button, my toe tapping impatiently as I stared at the name.

"Don't call her again," Alice warned, "that'll be the tenth time. Just give it a rest Edward. There's a restaurant connected to the gas station, want to go sit down in there?" I snapped my phone shut as I shoved it hastily in my pocket.

"Fine," I grumbled. I really needed to find something to occupy my mind until she could get here. I shuffled my feet like a child, my head towards the ground as we headed into the tiny restaurant. We were sat at a booth, and I ordered only a small fry, knowing I wouldn't be able to eat much until Bella was by my side.

Alice and Jasper were talking about who knows what when I heard the little diner bell chime above the door. I looked up to see two lanky looking men asking for a seat. My stomach turned at the site of them, but I couldn't place why.

The waitress sat them in the booth behind me, one of them even nodding his head in my direction as he passed. I smiled back politely, as I turned back to my fries. I was playing with one when I heard the men behind me begin to speak.

"The little slut couldn't have gotten this far." one of them said, and my eyes shot up immediately, while Jasper and Alice remained in their own little world, not noticing the conversation behind me.

"She could've hitched a ride," the other said a little more gruffness to his voice. They had to be talking about Bella, and I wondered if one of them was Chris.

"I can't believe she did that to Bob," the first guy said, chuckling softly, "she had to know they'd send a search party out after that. I mean that guy paid a million dollars for her!"

"He probably deserved it, I've heard he's into some freaky shit," the second guy said. They would be sending everyone they could to find her if what these guys were saying was true. Someone who had so much money with a strange fetish would go to any means to keep it quiet.

"Yea, maybe. But still, it was pretty dumb on her part. Too bad Chris just won't drop it and let her go already. I mean what, isn't this the third time she's run away?"

I assumed the second man chuckled, "She has guts, you have to give her that. She's lucky Chris has some sick obsession with her so he hasn't had her killed yet. You know Misty? Yea, her daughter ran away once, sent us to find her. Let's just say, if they'd wanted her back, we would've needed a body bag." My eyes grew wide. Shit. I hoped these guys didn't know Bella had been staying with me, or not only I could be in danger, but so could Alice and Jasper. I knew we should get out of there as soon as possible, but my curiosity had me rooted in my spot.

Alice noticed the look on my face then, and she went to question me when I put my finger in front of my mouth and motioned for her to listen too.

"I don't think Chris is going to keep her alive this time. I think Renee is just going to try to sell that kid first, but as soon as it's out Bella's as good as dead." Alice's eyes grew wide in fear too as she pulled her phone out and began to punch buttons in her phone. I looked at her questioningly as she mouthed that she was texting Rose and Emmett. I nodded as we strained to hear more.

The sound of the vinyl on the seat alerted me that they were getting up, and I looked back down into my fries as the two walked out past me without so much as a glance in our direction. I blew out a breathe as I watched them out the window get into their car and drive off down the rode in the opposite direction from where Bella was coming from.

I called Rose quickly as I filled her in on the little bit that I heard. I had to get Bella with me as soon as possible, and we had to find somewhere safe for my entire family.

BPOV

The ride with Rose and Emmett was surprisingly nice. Rose and I got to talking and she told me more about her life. I came to find that I actually liked her, and she and I were laughing and telling stories like old friends in no time.

Edward called numerous times, always checking to make sure we were still okay, and we poked fun at his nervousness. I knew I should be nervous too, of course I could be found at any time, but for now I was enjoying my freedom. I was enjoying feeling like a normal person.

Rose and Emmett both told me about how they had been trying to have children for a few years now, but because of Emmetts multiple sexcapades in high school leaving him with Chlamydia.

Rose sniffled as she spoke, "They caught it, so he didn't transmit it to me, but he was one of the rare cases. It caused him to be…well he has a lower chance to have children."

"Just say it Rose," Emmett growled, and I watched as he clutched the steering wheel, the look of resentment clear on his face.

"He's sterile," she whispered before suddenly getting quiet, and I knew she was crying now as I watched Emmett wipe away a few tears of his own.

"It's not like I knew this would happen. The doctors have tried different things with me, but I don't think…there's a 99% chance that I can never get her pregnant." I could tell by the tone in his voice that it killed him that he couldn't give Rosalie the one thing she desired.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, but Rose waved her hand in the air as if dismissing my words.

"No, no don't be sorry. I really am sorry. I know I already said it, but really, I shouldn't have lashed out. Besides, Em and I can still always adopt. We'll figure something out," she said, throwing Emmett a small smile as she grasped his hand. He looked at her still apologetically, but the love that was shared between them made me envious. I wondered if I would ever be able to love someone like that.

Rosalie's phone vibrated suddenly and she looked at it and I could almost hear her rolling her eyes.

"Oh," she said softly and I wished I knew what had elicited that response, "why…" her voice trailed off as she instructed Emmett to pull over to the side of the road.

"Alice said not to come to the gas station. She said someone will call to tell us what's going on, that's weird," at her words I felt my blood run cold. Was Chris there? Why couldn't we go to Edward? I suddenly felt panicked, what if something happened to them? What if this was all just a rouse to get me to stay in one spot.

"Uh Rose, do you think we can keep moving? I mean we're still quite a bit away aren't we?" I asked anxiously, as she turned in her seat to face me.

"Yea we still have about thirty minutes, but they said to stay put. Bella are you okay?" she stared at me with concern on her face.

"I just don't like being in one place too long. They're still looking for me ya know." I stated as I stared out the windows into the darkness as if there was a monster outside waiting for me.

"She's right," Emmett said, "we should keep moving, if anything, we can just pass up the gas station and have us meet them somewhere else."

A huge rush of relief filled me as the car began to move again, and I settled back comfortably in my seat. The more distance between me and that hell the better.

The darkness flew by us as an uncomfortable silence fell between the three of us. Continuously I glanced at the speedometer as I will Emmett to go faster. Glancing back in the mirror Emmett caught me as he smiled at me weakly.

"Going as fast as I can," he said with sincerity and I only nodded as a barrage of lights began to move towards us in the distance. Rose's phone rang again and she answered it quickly, while I strained to pick up any piece of the conversation I could.

Rose told Emmett to stop where we had previous planned as she turned to fill me in on the phone call. Before she could get the words out I spotted Edward, I pushed on her seat and she moved quickly out of the way as I bounded towards Edward.

If we'd been on a beach this could've been a scene straight out of some corny love movie as we ran towards each other, nobody else around us seeming to exist. He stopped, allowing me to jump into his arms, and I finally breathed a sigh of relief.

Tears filled my eyes as we stared at one another, and soon his lips were all over my face. I heard a cough behind us, and blushed as we turned to Alice, Jasper, Emmett, and Rose staring at us.

"I know you two are excited to see one another, but we really need to get moving," Rosalie advised. I didn't want to be separated from Edward again as we drove, he must've seen the upset look on my face as he squeezed me reassuringly.

"I'll have Jasper drive, and you and I can sit in the back together okay? You look beat." I leaned against him as we walked towards the car, finally beginning to feel the exhaustion creeping into my bones.

We climbed into the car, as I settled my head on Edward's lap. He stroked my hair lovingly, but I could see in his eyes that he wanted me to tell him everything that had happened.

"Bella…," I cut him off, as I my eyes pleaded with him not to push me just yet. He gave me a tight smile as he continued to brush my hair away from my face. Before long I could feel my breathing steady as I listened to the sounds of the car around me.

I don't know how much longer I awoke, drenched in sweat as Edward looked at me in concern.

"Are you hot? Let's get this jacket off you," he said, as I sat off shrugging off the material. I heard a gasp as I looked back at Edward who was eyeing the burns littered across my arms.

"They're not so bad," I shrugged, laying back down.

"Bella, what did they do to you?"

"Nothing I couldn't handle," I said, still trying to put off telling the whole story.

"Are these…all of them?" he said through clenched teeth, causing me to bite my bottom lip.

"No." I responded matter of factly.

"Bella, please…,"

"Edward, no. Please don't push me. When we're all together again I'll tell you the whole story…," I looked at him, tears swimming in my eyes, "I don't want to have to relive it more then once."

He seemed to understand as he went back to stroking my hair, but I could see his own tears in his eyes. His hand stopped, and I waited for it to begin moving again, and felt my heart clench when he ran his hand down my arm to rest on my stomach.

"How's the little boy?" he asked in barely a whisper.

"I'm not sure exactly. I tried to do the best I could. I'm going to need to get checked out."

"I'll have Carlisle check you out when we get where we're going."

"Where are we going?" I asked, curious now.

"Somewhere far away. Don't worry, Chris is going to have a hell of a time finding you where we are."

"What about your job? I don't want you uprooting your life for me," I said, guilt filling me.

"I can work from home. It's no big deal. I'm in this until the end," he looked up at Alice who was looking back at us, "We're all in this until the end." He corrected as she beamed back at him.

I felt myself drifting off into sleep again, and listened to murmuring of the others in the car as they tried not to be too loud. I forced myself awake suddenly as I turned my head to look at Edward.

"What…are you okay?" he asked panicked, as I put my forefinger over his mouth.

"I love you." I said, not knowing what this would mean in the long run. His smile was breathtaking as his hand caressed our child.

"And I love the both of you."

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Ewww was that too sappy? I'm getting the sappy heeby geebies so you guys better like it!

Haha you all hate me because I have written chapter 17 already, but you have to wait two chapters to read it. And as Amber said after reading it {yes I let her read it, she is my other brain}, "What in the actual fuck?!". baha.

I researched the Chlamydia thing, don't know about the 99% chance thing but…wtf its my story, and that's just how I roll bitches.

I had to throw in the searching for Bella part, I wasn't going to, but lets be honest, they are still out there looking for her and we can't pretend they're not just because Bella's no in their clutches anymore.

OH, also {jesus sorry again about the outrageous A/N's} I changed around chapter 4 thanks to some mistakes my beta at twilighted pointed out, also that means a few other details will change in this story as I get to them. Don't worry for the most part it will be the same, but just a few things different here and there, so feel free to re check it out.

Reviews are like crack to me and I need my fix.


	15. Broken Togetherness

I just noticed today exactly it's been two months since I started writing this story! Wow what a journey it's been. Also if you've already read this update, don't reread it, just a grammar error i had to fix really quick.

This chapter means we are halfway through our story. How does it feel kids? Oh btw, Amber1990 and I are going to be writing a fic together called Satin and Revolvers so be on thelookout for it. You are going to be blown away by it's awesomeness!

This is kind of shorter then i planned, but just bear with me, I didn't want this deal to be long and drawn out okay?

You should all thank Yyrollam for always nudging me to write.

SM still owns all.

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EPOV

I felt as if my heart had stopped in my chest as I listened to Bella's story. Her eyes pleaded with me to be understanding. I knew she didn't want me to pass judgement on her because of something she couldn't control. And I didn't blame her.

But that didn't stop the pure unadulterated anger that surged through my veins. Carlisle had promised to check on her and the baby after hearing her tale, and she had looked at me for some sort of response. I willed my mouth to open. I wanted to go to her, and tell her it would be okay. Instead my legs carried me outside, as I heard a small sob escape her throat.

I had been standing outside for who knows how long when I heard the soft click of the door behind me. Out of the corner of my eye I could see Alice standing beside me.

"You need to go back inside Edward. You're making her feel like you blame her." She said sternly, her hand resting on my arm.

"Christ Alice, how could I blame her? I'd never blame her…," I admitted as I looked into the darkness, "but I can't go back in there."

The look Alice was giving me could bring a man to his knees, but I refused to look her full on as she contemplated what I had said.

"She needs you right now," was all she said before going back into the house. Sighing I raked my fingers through my hair as I tried to wipe the images of someone hurting Bella.

I felt nauseated as I thought about my child being subjected to such horrible things already. Not even exposed to the world yet and he had already tasted almost every drug. He had felt fear like nobody should have to feel through the body of his mother. He had experienced her pain as she had lived through it, trying her best to block it out for his sake.

It was all so unfair, to the both of them. I wanted to find Chris and ring his neck. I wanted to subject him to pain like he could've never imagined inflicting on Bella even. My blood boiled as I thought of how sweet the revenge would be to hurt Chris and Renee over and over. The longer I stood out in the darkness the darker my thoughts became, and I quickly felt disgusted with myself.

I didn't want to be like them. Didn't want to think like them. Yet here I was, contemplating my options for how to hurt these monsters. The door clicked again, as Rose stepped onto the porch. I could tell by the over abundant smell of perfume that permeated my thoughts.

"Come inside Edward. I know it's hard, but you need to deal with this together." Rose's voice was hard, but unlike Alice she made no attempts to touch me. "Quit being such a dick and come comfort the woman you love!" She spat before turning on her heel and slamming the door behind her.

I knew she was right, and after a few minutes I walked back into the house. Bella's head shot up as she saw me, hope filling her face. Her eyes were bloodshot and tears stained her cheeks. Looking at her I instantly felt the anger return, as I brushed quickly past her.

"Alice, set up a room for Bella," I commanded, as my sister shot daggers at my head with her eyes. She had every right to be pissed. I had demanded Bella and I be in the same room, and now I was demanding that she be nowhere near me. I was a prick in every sense of the word but I couldn't stop my actions as rage blinded my thoughts and rationality.

Slamming the door I collapsed onto the bed as I heard Bella's sobs begin again. I pinched the bridge of my nose as I heard mumbling in the living room. Thankfully nobody came to reprimand me anymore for my actions, and I fell into a restless sleep that night as I visions of Bella being tortured played behind my eyes.

BPOV

Two weeks. It had been two weeks since Edward had spoken to me, touched me, or even looked at me for that matter. Everyday I felt dirtier and uglier as I moped around the house, pretending to be happy for the others.

Alice was trying so hard to keep my spirits up as she took shopping trips, bringing me back maternity clothes that would make me look like some pregnant model. She spoke quickly and enthusiastically as she made plans for her future niece or nephew. Most of the time I couldn't help but smile at her contagious behavior, but my happiness would quickly be dashed as Edward continued to avoid me. He even refused to be in the same room as me.

The good news was that Carlisle had checked me out, and after running as many tests as he could before my little bundle of joy could be born and so far everything was coming back good. It was a huge sigh of relief that my baby would be okay. I wanted to tell Edward so he too could rejoice in the news, but after having him slam the door in my face Carlisle had decided to tell him instead. He had told me that Edward was relieved at the turn of events, but he still refused to face me.

The rest of the family was being as helpful as ever. Esme doted over me, and rarely allowed me to do anything, wanting to make sure I wasn't under too much stress. Rose was constantly chattering with me about the things that were going on at work while she wasn't around to supervise. Everyone had taken to working at home with the exception of Carlisle, who had transferred to the nearest hospital after giving up his residency back at home.

Emmett was constantly being noisy as we listened to numerous sports events come from his room followed by his huge cheers, or his anger ranting. I hadn't even been aware there were so many sports out there until being around Emmett. He always seemed to find something of interest, and I couldn't help but laugh when he threw a half eaten bagel at the TV screen when his golfer missed the putt.

Jasper kept to himself, always reading some sort of history book or watching something on the history channel. Despite his boring routines he was the one I preferred to be around as I always tended to feel so comforted when I was sitting by him. Occasionally we would get into heated discussions about events in history, where Jasper normally won, but most of the time spent together was spent in silence.

I was pleasantly surprised when the family presented me a brand new top of the line camera. It choked me up to know how much my picture taking meant to me, and I had begun to take pictures of the family in their everyday life as well as walking around in the small forest surrounding our house just capturing the beauty of nature.

Already I had a dozen pictures that I had printed that Alice had framed and placed throughout the house claiming I was the best photographer she had ever seen. I couldn't help but feel good at her praise, feeling as if for once I could do something right.

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Today was a strange day as I read the note that Alice had left me stating that the entire family had to leave. I hadn't been left alone since I'd be found and it felt strangely freeing and frightening as I looked around the house for something to do.

My stomach rumbled, so I went into the kitchen to make myself some breakfast as I hummed softly to myself.

"Where is everyone?" his voice cut through me and I felt my entire body stiffen.

"Out," I responded not even turning towards him to acknowledge his presence, "hungry?"

"Yea, actually," he responded and I didn't understand how he could be so formal with me after ignoring me for so long.

I finished up the food, as I placed it in front of him, while we both tried to look anywhere but at one another. Edward ate quickly, pushing away from the table as soon as he was done while he mumbled a thanks to me.

Cleaning the dishes quickly I headed outside with my camera, willing myself not to think about the brief encounter that had just taken place. The air felt fresh in my lungs as the sound of the shutter calmed me.

After a few hours I stepped back into the house feeling completely relaxed. Hearing the soft sound of the tv I headed to the spare room, hoping maybe Edward would at least talk to me a little. As soon as he noticed me he quickly turned the television off as he stood to leave.

Suddenly all of the weeks of rejection and avoidance hit me as I stood my ground in front of the door, not allowing him access to leave.

"What the hell is your problem?" I demanded, as he stared at me, his eyes dark.

"You know, if I really make you so sick that you can't even be in the same room with me well then….well then I'll just leave!" I shouted before turning on my heel.

Halfway down the hallway I felt his hand on my shoulder as he spun me around to look at him.

"Bella don't go…" he tried, but I was too hurt now to care what he had to say.

"You know what Edward," I yelled, shoving him off of me, "if I was really so disgusting then you should have just left me to fend for myself! It would've been easier than this!" Tears were streaming down my face at this point, and I could barely make out Edward's blurred vision as the weight of the hurt felt as if it were crushing my chest.

"First you tell me you love me, and then this! More rejection by someone I care about? More pain?! I would rather take what Chris did to me everyday for the rest of my life then this feeling you have put on me!" My knees gave as I slowly sank to the ground, my head in my hands.

"You think I hate you Bella?" his voice was soft and low as he stood above me, "I hate myself!" I was confused by his statement as I felt him sink the floor beside me, his back against the wall.

"He did things to you…to our child, and I couldn't do anything! Fuck. I should've been there. I should've never let you leave without me. I should've gotten to you sooner!" his fist pounded the floor beside me as I looked up at him to find tears pouring down his own face.

"I'm supposed to be able to protect you," he whispered, the look in his eyes heart breaking.

"Edward," I said placing my hand on his arm, "you can't carry that weight around. Nobody could've stopped it."

"I should've been able to Bella. You told me how dangerous he was. You told me you thought he knew where you lived. You were afraid he would find us everyday, and I didn't take your fears seriously. And now…now you've been hurt. Our child could've been killed along with you…who else could I blame?"

I didn't know what to say to him as I stared at his broken form beside me. Instead I snuggled up to him, and to my relief he wrapped his arm around me before placing a kiss on my forehead.

Even though I knew there was so much more that needed to be said I relished in the calming silence of our breathes together. With Edward's arms around me I knew that everything was going to be alright.

"Bella," Edwards voice was still soft and I hummed in response, "I really do love you. I'm sorry for being such a jerk."

"I know. We're just going to have to work on this together." I responded as my fingers absently traced patterns on his chest.

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Still kind of angsty? Yea but it needed to be done, and it is still pretty fluffy if you ask me. I'm thinking there might be two more chapters of fluff, but we'll see how this plays out as I keep writing. Hopefully in a few days I'll update again.

Possibly next chapter: finding out the sex of the baby!

Reviews make happy endings.


	16. It's a Beautiful Baby

It has been at least 13 days since I've posted. Surprisingly enough nobody has come to kick my ass…yet…I think that's slightly because Amber is MIA this week thanks to her exams. But I have had a bit of writers block. So if you hadn't noticed I've been trying to avoid well…this site all together. Sorry lovelies.

Thanks Amber for the brief inspiration! And thanks Labbit for listening to me bitch about how I couldn't write!

If this is awkward I'm sorry. I'm just trying to pull myself through to easier times.

Sorry it's shorter then usual, but as promised to my bb Yyrollam here's your update!

SM pwns me this week considering how crappy my writing's been.

EPOV

Bella and I sat in that position until I could no longer feel my legs, and still I didn't want to move and ruin our moment. I was perfectly happy sitting and basking in the wonderful being that was Bella.

The sound of tires on the gravel announced that the family was home, and I listened to the screen door slam as feet pattered across the floor.

"Work everything out?" Alice asked, one hand on her hip as she narrowed her eyes at me. I nodded my head yes as I realized that Bella had fallen asleep on me.

"It's about time you stop being such an asshat," Rose said as she breezed past Alice down the hall. She stopped abruptly before turning to us.

"Are you going to take her to bed or just let the woman carrying your child sleep on the floor all night?"

Realizing that Bella was still asleep on me I gently lifted her as Alice walked down the hall towards Bella's room.

"Alice," I said, summoning her attention, "my room."

Her face broke into a huge smile as she skipped to the opposite end of the hall to open the door to my room. I laid her gently on the bed, as I turned to Alice who was still beaming at me.

"I told everyone it would be a good thing if we left the two of you alone," she said clearly gloating at the fact that she was right.

"You planned this?"

"Of course I did Edward. Besides, we had some shopping to do for the baby anyway!" She said before skipping out of the room.

Making sure Bella was alright, I slipped out after her. I stopped dead in my tracks as I took in all the baby things that surrounded me. Tiny clothes overflowed from bags, and I saw one that was filled with what seemed like miniature shoes. There was an unassembled crib resting against a box that said it was a mobile, whatever that was. My mind was having trouble processing everything.

"Go a little overboard?" I asked Alice as she crouched next to one bag already organizing the things inside.

"Not even! I didn't even get half the stuff I wanted!" Taking in my wide eyed expression she rolled her eyes before adding, "Carlisle and Esme bought some of it too ya know."

Rolling my eyes I made my way through the maze of baby things as I headed towards the kitchen. I poured myself a glass of water and drank it slowly as I leaned against the counter.

"You and Bella figure everything out?" Carlisle said from the doorway his eyes narrowed slightly. I knew my father had been pissed at my actions lately despite the fact that he hadn't verbally told me so.

"Yes. I'm going to be a better man for her." I told him, looking at the floor.

"Good. She needs a good man to take care of her Edward." His gaze was intent.

"You need to be that for her."

I opened my mouth to speak, but snapped it shut again as Esme flitted happily into the kitchen, humming as she moved.

"Oh hi honey," she said as she began preparing something to eat.

"Carlisle, did you give it to Edward?" She asked, and I wondered if she was referring to the verbal lashing she had interrupted.

"No not yet," he mumbled, as though he were a child caught with his hand in the cookie jar.

"Well…," she began looking at him intently.

"Well…?"

"Give it to him!" she said in an exasperated tone, rolling her eyes as he shuffled out of the kitchen.

"That man, I swear," she mumbled, before taking a bite of her sandwich.

Carlisle returned a few moments later holding an envelope out to me.

"What's this?" I asked curious, as Esme's eyes shone.

"Open it!" she nearly squealed.

I flipped over the flap as I pulled out an add for a house. A really, really nice house. I looked up them both confused. Were they trying to hint that they didn't want us around?

"We put a bid in on it!" Esme burst out in an excited whisper.

"The others don't know about this, so please don't tell them." Carlisle begged, shoving his hands in his pants pocket.

"Mom, Dad, I don't know what to say," I said, excited at the prospect of having my own home with Bella.

"And the best thing is, it's nearby! So you won't be too far away from us," Esme exclaimed.

"Well just think about it son. You're starting a family now. You don't have to accept it. I know you can afford it yourself but…we just wanted to do this for you," Carlisle said, sounding as if he was choking up.

I felt tears form in my own eyes as I only beamed at the two of them.

"I'll pay you back," I stuttered, as Esme waved in dismissal at my idea.

"We just want you two to be happy," Esme coming over to hug me, "God knows you both deserve it."

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BPOV

I rolled over as best I could, my arm reaching out in search of Edward but all I felt next to me was the cool spot in the bed. Had everything just been a dream? I felt my chest tighten at the prospect as my eyes flew open. Taking in the unfamiliar surroundings I knew it couldn't have been a dream, I was in Edward's room.

As if on cue the door opened as Edward slipped stealthily inside, obviously unaware that I was awake. I watched amused as he tried to move around quietly, and had to stifle a giggle when he ran into something on his way to the bed causing him to hop the last five steps.

He stumbled onto the bed, as he bumped me slightly. I could hear him cursing under his breath as I began to laugh out loud at him.

"Bella?" He asked surprised at my little outburst.

"Are you awake?" He continued as he reached into the darkness for me.

"Yea," I managed out in between my quiet laughs and it was almost as if I could hear his eyes rolling in the darkness.

Taking a few deep breaths I calmed my laughter as his arms finally reached me, wrapping me up in them. I settled back into him until I was cozy as I inhaled the scent of Edward.

He smelled like sweat, soap, and something I couldn't quite place. He smelled like home.

"Where did you go?" I asked nuzzling into his neck as he sighed in contentment at our bodies contact.

"Just to the living room. You should see it out there, it looks like Alice bought out every childrens store in state." I laughed at his description as I realized he probably wasn't exaggerating much.

Edward's hand reached out towards mine. Our palms met. My fingers came just below his finger tips as he bent them slightly, playing with my fingers.

"Bella," he said, finally breaking the silence between us.

"Hmm?" I responded, my eyes closed.

"What do you think about…getting our own place?"

My eyes shot open as I sat up and turned towards him even though I could only make out his faint outline in the dark.

"Where? What about your family? Is that safe?" I questioned all at once.

"Well it's nearby, we could still come visit my family but we'd have our own little haven. We'd still be just as hidden as we are now."

I began biting my lip as I thought over this revelation. Were we ready to have our own house?

"Don't answer now," he cooed, pulling me back into his arms, "come and look at it with me tomorrow."

"Okay," I said still dumbfounded.

We fell into a deep silence as I tried to process everything that was happening. I really had escaped Chris. Edward was real, and he really wanted me. Part of me wondered if maybe I had just gone crazy with Chris and was living an unrealistic life through my own mind, but pushed the thought off quickly. Even if I was hallucinating I would rather be then have to know what was happening to me.

"Edward, would you want to know the sex of the baby if you had the chance?" I asked softly, unsure if he had even heard me.

"I don't know, I never thought about it, why?" He said quietly in my ear causing me to shudder.

"Just wondering," I replied, chickening out.

I already knew as Carlisle had told me after he had run extensive tests on me after Rose and Emmett found me. Edward hadn't found out yet because he had been acting so stubborn, but I wanted to tell him.

Thinking back to that night I recalled being so frantic that something would be wrong. I tensed in anticipation that at any moment Carlisle would tell me that my child was ruined. Instead he had offered up the sex of the baby. Of course I had wanted to know.

"Bella," he beamed as he pointed out the heartbeat and various other body parts on the ultrasound machine he had borrowed from the hospital, "It's a…".

"Yes," he responded suddenly pulling me from my thoughts.

"Yes?" I asked meekly.

"I would want to know."

"Would you like me to tell you now?" I asked, stalling as my tension mounted.

Would he be mad I hadn't waited for him to be around to find out?

"Carlisle told me," I threw in quickly before he could question me.

"Yes, tell me now." He said softly.

"We're going to have a beautiful little…"

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Cliff hanger? I think not, it's a boy! Haha, sorry about cutting it off there, but I have plans for the next chapter that required I stopped there, but true to my words you all know! Little boy!

So very fluffy. I think there's going to be one more fluff chapter and then back to the angst bbs. Don't stress though, we're getting towards the end pretty quick and I promise you won't be disappointed {I hope}.

Reviews are almost as precious as baby boys.


	17. Bittersweet

Haha as I was reading your reviews I was also making a few adjustments to this chapter and adding a few things in…

Am I a liar? Yes I think I am. This is the chapter 17 I originally planned on, except with a few extra things added in. I just can't resist the angst! The beginning will be fluffy though, and this will be a nice long chapter for you all, even though you may completely hate me by the end….

SM owns all but my sick twisted thoughts.

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EPOV

A little boy. My mind was still reeling even though it was almost a week after Bella's admission. Even though we had been referring to him as a boy, it was still a lot to wrap my mind around.

I would be responsible for what kind of man he would become. I would have to teach him how to protect girls, but still be caring at the same time.

What would he look like? Would he have the same brown eyes as Bella or would he have my own? What kind of little boy would he be? Would I be able to punish him if it came down to it?

"Have you thought of any names?" I had asked her, as a million ran through my own mind.

"Yes," she said, and I could almost feel the heat radiating from her cheeks that were probably emanating a gorgeous red tint.

I waited in anticipation for her to reveal her ideas to me.

"Anthony," she finally said, "for your middle name."

"How did yo-" I began before she cute me off quickly.

"Rose told me," she said, her voice holding a hint of something I couldn't quite place.

"Oh," I said, slightly confused that Rose and Bella were talking about me.

"Are you two close?" I asked her.

"Yea. We talked on the drive home. I think we understand one another better now. She's really not so bad," she quipped.

"Besides, she can be like a breath of fresh air sometimes. She's not as eccentric and energetic as Alice."

I laughed at the truth in that statement.

"Well I'm glad you two figured things out then," I said, truly happy that Bella was getting along with everyone in my family, even the people I didn't generally get along with.

"I'm not sure I like Anthony, though," I confessed to her.

"Well what would you name him?" she asked, sounding slightly annoyed.

"I was thinking something more along the lines of…Phillip, or something like that." I heard her gasp, and I could tell by the way she had clung to me that she liked the idea too.

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Bella and I had gone to see the house the next day, and she instantly fell in love with it.

It was a quaint little house, painted all white with red shutters. From the outside it looked small, but inside it was rather large and homey.

When Bella's eyes lit up I knew instantly she wanted it. I talked to the real estate agent, making sure he knew that money was no object as long as I got what I wanted.

The agent and I spoke in private as I set up a plan to meet up with her the next day to finalize the deal. I told Bella I had to run into my office to grab a few papers. She was apprehensive at first, but made me promise to return home safe to her.

Now it had been almost a month since I had signed the paperwork and I was trying to finish up all the plans. Alice was continually sneaking away from Bella when she had her quality time with Rose, to come decorate. She and Esme were doing a fantastic job.

I was pleasantly surprised to find Bella and Rose's relationship continue to grow as they became best friends. Often times I would catch them giggling quietly with one another, giving me innocent smiles as I passed by. It made me happy to know she could have someone she got along with so well.

Bella's relationship with Rose was even effecting my own. We were by no means best friends, but we were tolerant of one another. Rose had come to talk to me after Bella and I had worked things out. After threatening not only my balls but my life if I hurt her ever again, she and I both came to terms with one another. All we wanted was to see Bella happy. I loved Rosalie for loving my Bella.

Carlisle was often holed up in his study, or working at the local small hospital. He seemed to love it there and I often noticed he was in higher spirits then I had ever seen him before. His mood directly effected Esme, and it seemed almost fairytale like to find that we were all living peacefully together despite the fact that there were eight of us stuck in one house.

Jasper spent a lot of time with Bella as well as they watched the history channel and did other boring things together, challenging one another with their wit. I was pleasantly surprised how intelligent Bella truly was despite her upbringing. What she didn't know, she craved to learn and I found myself watching her fascinating as she picked Jaspers brain for answers to the questions she didn't know.

The nights were ours to spend together as we took walks out under the stars, and sat on the porch just holding one another. We spent a lot of time getting to know one another, and I was becoming increasingly enamored by the woman that was Bella.

She was strong, and despite her fear of losing the things she cared about, she was a very trusting person. I couldn't understand how she could have such a forgiving heart. I envied the person she was, and the more I got to knew her the more I found the flaws in my own personality. I wanted to change for her, to be better for her.

Now today was the last day we would be staying with my family. Tomorrow I was going to surprise Bella with her new house. As usual, I made up an excuse about having to go to work for a few things, and she bought it. She and Rose had plans to watch some comedy movie with Emmett.

I kissed the tip of her nose as she beamed up at me, and promised her I would be home quickly. My pulse quickened as I thought of the look on her face when I gave her the house of her dreams, and hopefully the life of her dreams beginning tomorrow.

BPOV

Emmett, Rose and I sat on the couch together watching a horrible movie that was made to be a comedy but was about as entertaining as watching an ant. Emmett's guffaw resounded throughout the room causing Rose and I to laugh along with him, despite how ridiculous the movie was.

Rose and I were having more fun teasing Emmett about his movie choice then watching the movie. Neither of us minded though as we sat in the comfort of one another. Suddenly there was a light rapping on the door as Emmett jumped up in excitement.

"Pizza's here!" he exclaimed, pumping his fist in the air before running to the door. I laughed at him as Rose shook her head.

"He gets more excited over the delivery guy then he does over me."

We both laughed at that statement, both knowing how true it really was. We waited for Emmett to bring the food as I felt my stomach rumble. The baby kicked, almost as if he knew the food was on it's way and I tried to pat my stomach reassuringly.

"Hold on right here," I heard Emmet tell whoever was at the door, "I'll get your tip."

I rolled my eyes, it was so Emmett to forget something when food was involved. I got up, heading for the kitchen. I grabbed a glass of water, the sound of the rushing water soothing the nerves clawing their way up my stomach. Walking back to the living room I passed the front door where I stopped dead in my tracks as the delivery boy and I stared at one another in surprise. The glass fell to the ground, water splashing around us as the plastic cup bounced a couple of times resounding the silence that had fallen.

"Hello Isabella," Chris said as he sneered at me. I stood stark still. This had to be just another dream of mine. This couldn't be really happening right now. Not when everything was going so good.

"Em…Emmett!" I yelled over my shoulder as Chris came towards me slowly, his index finger over his mouth telling me to keep quiet. His hand reached under his shirt for what I was assuming was a gun as I bolted back to the living room.

"Bella, what is it?" Rose as, her brows furrowed as Chris came barreling in after me, "Whoa where's the fire?" She asked innocently, obviously confused by the strange exchange taking place between me and the pizza delivery boy.

"It's Chris, it's Chris!" I screamed as Rose's eyes filled wide with terror.

He grabbed me from behind, the barrel of the gun pressed up against my temple. At that moment I felt utterly defeated. There was no way I could get away from him now. My fate was to live and die with Chris. I felt oddly calm at the prospect, and only wished this didn't have to be my child's fate as well.

"Just let me take Bells and I won't hurt you guys, I just want her." Rose stood unmoving and I didn't blame her for taking his deal. I was nothing, a nobody to them before these past eight months, there was no reason they should risk their lives for me. I wouldn't risk my life for me either. I just hoped Edward wouldn't be too mad at them.

Chris hold loosened on me as I heard Rose scream out. Chris shoved me to the floor and I knocked into the corner of the couch. I held my stomach in my hands as I turned around quickly to see what was happening. Emmett and Chris were struggling for dominance over the other. It looked as though Emmett had hit Chris with something as blood was now running down his face.

"Rose, Bella, get out of here!" Emmett yelled out to us as the two wrestled around running into the coffee table. We watched in terror as the two slammed into the wall and I looked over to see Rose rooted to her spot, fear plastered to her face as her hands covered her mouth.

I knew I wouldn't be able to get her out of there without him, and I wasn't going to leave without her. Listening to the men's grunts I knew we couldn't just stand there. Sprinting towards the kitchen as fast as I could I grabbed the largest knife from the block. Re-entering the living room I saw that more had been disrupted in the power struggle.

Chris and Emmett were face to face now, wrestling for something between them that I couldn't see. A shot rang out and Emmett's eyes fell on me, pleading with me for something as his knees slowly buckled. The only sounds registering in my brain were the sporadic beats of my heart and the shot that still hung in the air as I watched the toughest man I knew sink slowly to the ground.

"EMMETT, NO!" Rose's heartbreaking scream tore me from my trace. I looked over to her to see her pulling at her hair, tears already streaming down her face. I heard the gun being cocked again, and I watched as Chris's arm rose slowly in her direction.

"NO!" I screamed, lunging instinctively towards the two, my hand with the knife outstretched before me. I felt the knife tearing through flesh and I was vaguely aware that I was still screaming out. Chris stumbled to the ground as I felt his flesh slip off of the blade.

"We have to go, NOW!" I commanded, running to Rose and grabbing her hand. Her body gravitated towards Emmett as I heard her gasping for breath.

"But..but…Emmett, we can't just leave him!" she begged me, reaching for his limp body.

"No Rose, we have to go now!" I yelled, grabbing the gun quickly from Chris's hand, and thrusting the knife towards Rosalie. "Take this, let's go," I said forcefully, pulling her with me.

"Em, I'm sorry. I'm sorry baby!" she yelled behind us, "I'll never forget you Em, you are my whole world!! I LOVE YOU!" We were nearly to the door, when Chris stepped out from the kitchen, smirking at us. My breath caught in my throat as I tried to contemplate how he had gotten there so fast.

"Now why'd you go and do that Isabella? Huh?" I stared at him, and watched as blood dripped from the back of his shirt. He advanced towards us as I backed Rose and I into a wall, with Rose behind me.

"You're going to pay for that," he said, his voice only a low whisper.

I raised the gun at him, and pulled the trigger as it hit him in the side, he stopped for a second clutching his stomach, but after a second he continued towards us. My hands shook as I tried to cock the gun again, but Chris knocked it from my hands, as he pulled a switchblade out from his pocket.

"Renee's gonna be pissed if I kill you and that kid, so lets get him out now shall we?" He was smiling slightly as he advanced towards me. "You should know what it's like to lose children by now," his words hit me low, and Rose shot out from behind me thrusting the knife at him again, but only grazing his shoulder.

"You bastard!" she screamed, her hatred seething, "You killed him! I swear to God, you will not kill us too!" She lunged again, catching his abdomen. He groaned in pain, but grabbed her wrist, pushing her away from him. I watched as his knife disappeared in her flesh, and it felt as if my whole world had stopped.

"GET OFF OF HER!" I yelled, attempting to tackle his back with all of my strength. He pushed us backwards, and I felt the hard wall come in contact with my back as I felt the air knocked out of me. He stepped forward as my flailing stopped, wiping his face before turning towards me.

"Bitch," he croaked, advancing towards me, the knife with Rose's blood only inches from my face, "why do you have to keep making things SO FUCKING DIFFICULT?!" I inhaled sharply as I brought my knee up into Chris' groin and didn't stay to watch as he doubled over in pain.

I bolted towards my room. I had to get to the fire escape. I slammed the door behind me, and struggled to push open the window. It seemed stuck, and I cursed under my breath, my hands shaking.

"BITCH!" I heard Chris yell from the living room, and I knew he would be looking for me now. I tried to move quicker, but found my hands were shaking hard. Finally the window wrenched open, and I found that I wouldn't be able to fit out with the size of my stomach.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck," I groaned, "no, please!" I willed my body to fit, but to no avail. I heard Chris's footsteps coming closer, and I quickly ran into the closet, hiding behind the dresses that hung there.

The door creaked, and I could hear Chris' heavy breathing. I held my hand over my own mouth to keep any sounds from escaping as I listened to Chris standing in one spot. The sound of his footsteps moved towards the window. He stood there for a minute, and my heart beat erratically in my chest. What was he doing out there?

I heard him flick his lighter as smoke slowly began to permeate my nostrils. Staring into the darkness I hoped that he had just given up, or maybe he forgot what he was supposed to be doing. I heard him sigh as the mattress creaked, from what I assume was his weight being applied to it.

"I know you're in here," he said softly as I listened to him blow out another puff of smoke. "Everyone else is out of the way now Bells, I can wait as long as you want."

I held my head in my hands, trying to figure out what to do next. He was sitting on the bed, so I could maybe make it out of the bedroom door before he could get to me. I sighed, knowing what a risk that would be, but I couldn't just sit and wait for him to come kill me. I took a deep breath as I moved as quietly as possibly to the opening of the closet without Chris seeing me.

One…Two…Three.

I dashed from the closet, sprinting to the door, I grabbed the handle, ripping it closed behind me in an attempt to slow Chris down. I glanced behind me as I moved down the hallway, and saw that my plan had worked momentarily. Suddenly I fell on the ground with a thump, and I saw that Chris had dragged Emmetts body into the hallway. He had figured I would try to run.

In a flash Chris was above me, glaring down at me.

"You're mine now," I tried to scramble, scooting myself backwards as far as I could push mine and Emmetts bodies. I spun around, in an attempt to crawl away but felt a sharp pain in my side as I cried out. Chris's hot sweaty body was hovering over me now, as he held his hand over my mouth. "You can't escape me."

I whimpered into his hand while his weight continued to crush me. I felt another sharp pain, and I wished the torture would be over already. The front door slammed suddenly, and Chris looked up in shock obviously not prepared to be interrupted. He stared down the empty hallway, waiting to see who would emerge.

"Bella?" the voice rang out, "hey where is everybody."

Shit, Edward was home.

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"Oh she did not just do that to us!"

Oh bitys, I'm sorry but I definitely did.

One thing I want to explain, I know Chris kept getting hit by things and not going down. I kind of stole this idea from my friends in the marines. They have horror stories of dealing with Al Qaeda and because the men are so drug ridden their bodies continue to move even after they've been shot in the head and stuff. Not joke, you like have to cut their throat and stuff to actually get them to stop. So since Chris is such a druggie, this is basically what is happening with him.

Reviews will definitely make the next chapter come faster, and I know you are all about ready for that HEA I promised you right about now.

{btw I really am sorry this had to be done...}


	18. Sullen Solace

Really short update, you'll see why at the end of the chapter.

I know most of you didn't like 17, and I don't disagree with you. It was plaguing me the most, I debated it for about 2 months. I swear, ask Amber and Labbit. It has to be done. I'm sorry. I promise things won't get much worse, it's just going to be somewhat long to the happiness. Please stick with me! I swear there is a reason behind all of this!

Since that was so intense I would say you should all take a break and read the crackfic I posted last night {contradicting contractions}. Smile for a second, and then come back and we'll get going again. I've been trying to post more and more funny stuff so if you need to you can have something to smile at. Or if you are just done with this insanity go read Satin and Revolvers. It's set to be good and dramatic, but not nearly as angst.

Oh and I posted an entry for the Age of Edward Contest: Sieg der Liebe. Please read it and review for me. I promise I'll try to update more quickly next time for you.

Your revenge is coming loves.

Sm still owns the names and certain characteristics.

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EPOV

I walked into the house a smile plastered on my face as I waited to tell Bella the good news. We could start moving in now, and everything she had dreamed could come true now.

An eerie silence greeted me as I heard the sounds of a movie coming from the living room.

"Bella?" I called out, wondering where the hell everybody was at.

If Emmett made them go out for pizza again I was going to be pissed. Last time the pepperoni had given Bella indigestion and kept her up all night. That was definitely not good for the baby.

"Hey, where is everybody?" I asked only to be greeted by the silence around me.

Heading towards the living room I immediately noticed something wasn't right. Even from the hallway I could see that the coffee table had been moved, and I gasped upon reaching the entry way.

Rose was on the ground, blood covering her clothes. My heart hammered in my chest as I hurried to find Emmett and Bella.

Turning around I began to head back the direction I came. The hallway was dark causing me to trip over something. Flipping the switch on I saw Emmetts body beneath me, a trail of blood lead from the kitchen notifying me that he had not moved to the hallway on his own; he had been dragged.

Vomit caught in my throat as I tried to fight away tears. My brother, my protector, the person I had looked up to all my life was laying lifeless before me.

All of my thoughts turned to Bella. What if she was dead too? I felt as if a weight crashed down on my body as I quickly checked the bedroom. I noted signs of a struggle, but found no Bella. Clutching the door frame for support I felt the tears began to fall down my face when suddenly a single shot rang out behind me.

BPOV

Chris clamped his hand over my mouth as he shoved me into the kitchen. I tried to hold back a sob as I heard Edward walk into the living room followed by a sharp intake of breath. He had found Rosalie.

I listened as he moved back through the hallway, heading to where we had just been as Chris pushed me into the living room. I strained to hear any sound coming from Edward, and suddenly heard a thump. He had fallen? Oh God, he must've fallen over Emmett's body.

My chest tightened, I didn't even want to imagine the look on Edward's face when he found his wall of a brother lifeless on the floor.

A tiny sliver of light ran down the hallway towards us, and I waited to hear any sort of noise from Edward. Instead all I heard was a deafening silence that seemed to split my heart in two.

My mind began to wander. I wished Edward would just leave, get out and safe himself now. It was my fault that two members of his family were killed, he should just cut his losses and go. But I knew he never would, and my heart rejoiced at the thought that he would stop at nothing to keep me safe.

As my mind battled with my heart a shot resounded through my head.

"Fuck," Chris said, as I felt his body slowly slide to the ground behind me.

I turned slowly to find Rosalie holding the gun with a vengeance in her eyes like I'd never seen. Reaching down slowly I ran a finger under Chris's nose to find he was no longer breathing. I pressed my fingers against his neck searching for a pulse, and cringed at the contact.

Memories flooded back of my life with him: drugs, prostitutes, death. My life had been run by sadness and fear. Now my captor lay before me lifeless, and I felt as though shackles were being lifted from my body.

I looked up to Rose as tears streamed down her face, the gun still trained on Chris. Her hands were shaky, and I rose slowly my hands in front of me. I didn't want her to shot me by mistake.

"I told you, you would never hurt anyone I love again," she said quietly as the gun slipped from her fingers to the floor.

I moved to her quickly wrapping her in my arms. She sobbed openly now as she clung to me for dear life. Sobs coursed through my own body as everything that had just happened began to hit me.

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Time seemed to be moving in slow motion.

Edward had rushed into the living room, relief and pain covered his face. He was relieved to see Rosalie alive, but pained at all that had been suffered and lost here.

He had wrapped both Rose and I in an embrace as we stood there sobbing. And just like that time seemed to move into fast forward mode.

Alice came home followed by screams, sobs, and phone calls. Paramedics arrived all too soon, and I was forced to be checked out, and I listened behind me to Rosalie panic while paramedics tried to put Emmett in a body bag.

The police were full of questions, but I could only stare at them in disbelief, and they quickly gave up letting me know they would be questioning me after the shock wore off.

Edward was by my side the entire time, and I saw he worry etched in his face as the paramedics let us know we wouldn't know if the baby had been effected until I could get an ultrasound. I knew I should care, should be worried, but my body had been bombarded with so many emotions for one day.

Part of me wanted to sing from the rooftops. I was free. Me. For the first time in my life freedom actually held a meaning to me. Chris was no longer there to loom over me, threatening my life and any chance at happiness.

Yet still I knew Renee would be looking for me and if Chris had known where I was she would too. I wanted to believe the police would be able to protect me, but I knew too many had been bought off and would easily give me up.

The biggest part of me wanted to just curl up and cry for all eternity. I had brought death and pain to Edward and his family. Their son was dead because of me, their daughter in-law scarred for life.

Tears welled in my eyes as I looked out of the back of the ambulance into the darkness surrounding us.

I should've never gone to Edward's apartment. If I hadn't told him about the baby he never would've gotten involved. Emmett would still be alive.

Edward stroked my hand softly causing me to turn and look at him. He smiled slightly, and even behind all his pain I could see true happiness in his eyes. How could he be so happy when I was the hurricane bringing pain and destruction into his life.

"The babies going to be fine, I just know it," he tried to console me, as he obviously thought I was upset over our child.

I smiled tightly back at him as I turned my attention back to the window sorrow flooding my body. As the ambulance turned a corner I watched as dawn began to break and wondered if any of us could ever be happy again.

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I hate to do this. I think this is the shortest chapter ever but I'm leaving this in limbo, it's your guys call now. I can effectively end this story in about…oh two or three chapters after this if you're ready for the angst to just be over. Or I can stick to my original plans, we can have some more angst, but also more chapters. I'm honestly leaving it up to you all now so review and let me know. Sorry for the short chapter.


	19. Inducing Pain

So….surprise, twofer! Well I got a few reviews on the last chapter telling me to go with my gut, and I need to stay true to myself in order to bring you the best story possible. I can however, promise to wrap it up. So maybe instead of 30 chapters we'll have 25 and a epi.

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BPOV

"We're going to have to induce labor," the doctor said as he looked at the ultrasound images in front of him, "the baby's fine, but we're worried about your wife."

Edward's eyebrows furrowed as he tried to take in what the doctor was telling us. My heart fluttered at the idea of having our little boy already. He would be almost a month early.

"I don't understand," Edward said, crossing his arms in front of his chest, "what's wrong with her?"

"Her stab wound hit her upper intestines, it's something we can fix, but not while the baby is in there. The anesthesiologist is on her way now." the doctor explained as he closed my chart and left the room abruptly.

Edward paced back and forth, and I wondered what was happening in that head of his.

"Stupid doctors," he muttered, "they think everything is just cut and dry! It isn't _time_ for my son to be born. And my wife could be at risk for…for God knows what!"

I stared at him as the words left his mouth. _Wife_? As if he heard my thoughts Edward's eyes shot up to meet mine, his cheeks turning a slight red as he made no attempt to correct himself or explain his slip.

He continued to pace the room, muttering so low I couldn't make out the words. I watched him until I began to feel dizzy when Alice walked into the room.

"Edward," she said, grabbing his arm causing him to stand still for a moment. I shot Alice a thankful look as she continued, "let's go get some coffee. The doctor said it may be half an hour before the anesthesiologist gets here, we can kill some time."

A small wave of relief shot through me as I watched the two leave the room. I wanted Edward there, but with everything else we had been through I couldn't help but feel overwhelmed with all the emotions Edward was emitting.

I closed my eyes, trying to find a comfortable position despite all the wires hooked to my body and the crappy mattress. I listened to the sound of the door opening and closing, and wondered how Alice and Edward had moved so quickly. When there were no other sounds, my eyes shot open.

Renee stood before me a sick grin on her face as Misty stood next to her. Both were dressed up. From their outfits it seemed that Renee was playing the anesthesiologist while Misty was supposed to be her helping nurse. Panic flooded my body, as Renee moved towards me.

"Isabella, baby. I was so worried about you," she said, fake concern coating her tone.

When I didn't respond she moved closer.

"Misty here was so worried about you. She thought that moron Chris had hurt you. I was more worried about that precious angel though, I must admit," she rasped her hand reaching out to caress my stomach.

I wanted to yell at her when the door suddenly opened and the doctor stepped back in.

"Oh," he said obviously surprised, "you got her fast. Will you please sedate her properly? We need to get the child as soon as possible."

"Of course doctor," she said as she moved me to turn over. I wanted to tell him that she was an imposter, but could tell by his eyes that he was one of hers. A paid off servant to the evil of my world.

"Turn over now," both of them coaxed, and I knew by their faces there was no use trying to fight them.

Misty tried to give me an encouraging smile but I could see the pity she held in her eyes as I felt the needle at the bottom of my spine.

"Now this will only hurt a little," Renee cooed, and I hoped that she had some idea of what she was doing.

The doctor walked to the door, turning the lock as Renee smiled sickly at me.

"Don't worry, this will all be over soon," she said as the doctor began washing his hands in preparation for my birth.

"Ar…are you going to induce my labor?" I stammered stupidly.

"No dear. I'm afraid we don't have time to wait for you to dilate. We're going to have to remove him cesarean." The doctor told me, and I wondered why he was trying to keep up the polite charade.

The epidural began to set in, but before I was fully numb I felt a blinding pain as Renee began to carve into me.

"You really shouldn't do that, she's not ready yet. You could hurt the child," the doctor said sounding panicked, and I wondered then if maybe he wasn't a paid croonie.

"Oh shut up, or I'll kill your little girl too. Just watch the damn door," she snapped.

My heart fluttered as I cried out in pain.

"Stop it," Misty's voice piped up as Renee and I looked at her in surprise.

"Please, don't hurt her," she pleaded.

Renee shot her a warning glance, shutting her up quickly. I tried to smile at her to thank her for the attempt when another flash of pain hit me.

"Bella," a voice said suddenly as I heard pounding on the door, "what's going on in there?! Let me in!"

"Edward!" I screamed, not knowing what else to do.

"Open the fucking door!" he yelled as I heard his fists pound harder against the wood.

Renee rolled her eyes as she continued her work, the pain continuing through my body. The doctor stood by the door, his face a sickly white.

"I can't do this," he said as he made a move for the handle, Renee turned to reprimand him when he passed out on the floor.

"Doctor," she laughed as she shook her head.

"No, stop!" Misty said, her voice full of determination this time.

"You are going to kill her. She's losing to much blood." she tried.

"Like I care, as long as the little fuck's alright," she said turning back to me.

"NO!" she shouted, lunging herself on top of Renee as the two began to struggle.

"Bella get out!" she yelled at me, as I looked around wondering how the hell she expected me to do that with my legs half numb and a gaping hole in my stomach.

Gripping the railing of the bed I hoisted myself to my feet, and pushed off lurching towards the door, my iv ripping from my skin. My hand caught it as I quickly unlocked the door before slipping to the ground.

"Oh my God, Bella!" Edward shouted as he opened the door finding me in my own blood.

"Edward, just get me out of here. NOW!" I yelled at him, urgency filling my voice.

Cradling me like a child Edward carried me to Alice's car as she jumped in the drivers seat.

"Take us to our house Alice! Hurry, and call Carlisle!" he commanded as he continued to cradle me in the backseat.

"I'm sorry," I told him as he smoothed my hair away from my forehead.

"For what?" he asked me.

"Ruining everything." I stated simply, feeling more and more lightheaded.

"You didn't ruin anything," he said as he looked me over.

"Can't I keep you safe anywhere?" he asked exasperated, obviously more upset with himself then anything else.

"You're bleeding so bad. I have to let you go, so I can take off my shirt. I need to apply pressure to that or something." I nodded as I watched him strip off his shirt.

He held it against my stomach gingerly, but by that time the epidural had completely kicked in.

"Is Rose going to be okay?" I asked, trying to make conversation.

"Physically, yes. Mentally…I don't know that she'll ever be the same," he said as he looked to the front seat at Alice.

"This is all my fault," I said, tears threatening to fall.

"No, it's not. You ended up in a fucked up situation, but it is not your fault. Calm down Bella. Please. You can't overexert yourself."

"Ok," I said, caving easily. I was feeling too tired to fight.

"Edward," I asked, "will you tell me a story?"

He looked around nervously as he thought for a second.

"What kind of story?"

"It doesn't matter," I told him, "about anything."

He took a deep breath as he looked down at me. Just when I thought he was going to ignore my request his voice broke the silence.

"When I was six I used to follow Emmett everywhere. Anywhere he was, I wanted to be. Well he and his friends decided to go hiking around in the hills behind our house one day. Of course I trailed along. About 15 minutes into our hike I got lost. I was so scared I started crying. I didn't even try to find my way home, I just sat down on the ground and cried."

"I don't know how long I was there, but next thing I knew Emmett was running towards me. Man he was so mad. He made fun of me in front of all of his friends and told me he was taking me home right that second. His friends stayed to keep hiking, and when Emmett and I were finally alone he said, 'Don't ever scare me like that again. I can't protect you if I don't know where you are.'."

Edwards voice cracked, and I thought his story was over before he added, "and then he told me, 'Besides, mom would kill me if something happened to you.'."

I heard Alice sniffle in the front seat as I watched a few tears escape Edward's eyes.

"I wish it had been me instead," I said quietly, snapping Edward back into reality.

Darkness clouded his eyes as he looked down at me for the longest time.

"No. Don't you ever think that. Emmett died for you to protect you…because that's who he was. A protector. He wanted you to live."

My voice stuck in my throat as I avoided Edward's eyes. We continued the ride in silence and I wondered how long this would be.

As the distance was put between me and my last captor I felt my eyes began to flutter with sleep.

"No Bella. Don't sleep. I need you to stay awake for me. You're losing too much blood." Edward said, concern laced in his voice.

"But I'm so tired," I told him, my eyes still trying to close as if they had a mind of their own.

"Bella, stay with me," I could hear him say frantically, but I couldn't pull myself from the darkness that was engulfing me.

"I'm sorry Edward…Edward?" I asked him, but all I heard was mumbling and I wondered if what I was saying was even understandable.

"Edward? Name him Emmett….name our baby Emmett," I requested before the darkness completely seeped into my thoughts.

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EPOV

"Name our baby Emmett," Bella kept repeating until her voice was no longer understandable.

"Bella, hold on baby. We're pulling into the driveway now, please just hold on. If you can hear me, please you can make it."

Alice threw the car into park as she shot out of her seat, calling for Carlisle as she ripped my door open.

"Bella, come on. Wake up honey." Alice tried, slapping her face a little.

"CARLISLE!" I bellowed, as he raced down the stairs, "What do I do now? She's out."

"We need to get her blood, and we need to get your son out now." he commanded as he hurried us into the house.

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I wanted to help, but Carlisle forced me to wait outside. Something about me being too worked up to be able to be an actual help. So now I was pacing in front of the door. No sounds came from the room except for a few murmured voices here and there.

Esme and Jasper were still at the hospital, and I called them to let them know what happened. They told me that Renee had been arrested and Misty was going to testify to anything Bella said. I felt a sigh of relief and couldn't wait to tell Bella.

I felt as though I had been pacing outside of this room for an eternity when the door finally opened.

"Meet your son," Carlisle said, as he handed me the most precious child I had ever seen.

He had dark hair covering his head, obviously a trait from his mother, and his tiny eyes looked up at me in confusion. Each finger and toe were tiny with perfection and I kissed each one, noting how even the sound of his cry sounded Angelic.

"How's Bella?" I asked quickly as I beamed up at Carlisle.

"Edward, she lost a lot of blood…I'm afraid she's fallen into a coma," he said, as I blinked in shock.

"How long will she be in the coma?" I asked, hoping he would say a few hours, maybe.

"Days, weeks. It's hard to say." He said resting his hand on my shoulder in comfort.

I sighed as I stared down into my child's face. So new to the world and already he was in danger of losing his mother.

"Mommy's going to be okay," I reassured him as I kissed his tiny head.

"What are you going to name him?" Alice asked, curious to see if I was going to follow Bella's wish.

"Emmett. Emmett Tyler Cullen."

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Okay so Bella's in a coma. I promised you a happy ending so it's going to be a….fluffy coma? Yes she wakes up. Let's not panic. Shouldn't we just rejoice, the bad guys are taken care of, baby is safe, and I still have happy surprises to come! So I guess it won't all be AS angst as I allured too. I mean it won't be all happy because Bella will be "napping" but….damn I just need to shut up. You'll see.


	20. Beauty in the Breakdown

So after posting my second chapter last night I had a thought…how about I write a Rose chapter? I think you all deserve it.

**Started writing this before my hiatus, but now am back! Missed you all, and I realized just how much I need all of you. Really, best readers ever. I was surprised and touched by everyone who has sent their love and support during this hard time in my life**

The name of the chapter "Beauty in the Breakdown" is a song title by Imogen Heap. If you haven't heard it, you should definitely go listen to it...like right now, then come back and read! lol.

Uhhh here's a long thanks like the poppies do, just wanna fit in: Thanks Labbit, don't know what I would've done without you staying up late nights with me, and inspiring me that I can still be amazing even without the ass texter. Thanks Mina J for inspiring me, pushing me, giving me that pep talk that made me get my ass out of bed that first week. Thanks Olevia for shield of panty, Neville wanking, THE BEACH!, and everything else you've done for me. Love you hardcore...like hardcore porn, but harder, lol. And last but most definitely not least {because in all reality I can't thank every single person who's helped me, you know who you are} thanks Cam. I know I was probably a stick in the mud when I came to visit, but next visit will be more fun, and I can't wait for NM when we all meet in fresno bb!!

Disclaimer-SM owns the characters, I'm just the evil one that messes with them.

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RPOV

My eyes stayed trained on the ceiling as nurses and doctors moved around me, checking my vitals. I was being held overnight, after having to be subdued so that I could be dragged away from Emmetts body.

Part of me told me I should be angry with Bella. If it wasn't for her our lives would still be normal. But I couldn't blame her. It was my idea to watch over Bella. I knew the risks we were taking. Alice happily would've done it with Jasper, and then she would be laying here. I shook my head at the sick thought.

Tears began to sting my eyes, and I tried to inhale to shake off the feeling. Yet instead of the satisfaction feeling of air there was only a hollow empty feeling as my chest only tightened.

Emmett was really gone. My whole life, my whole world was taken from me in a matter of moments. I heard myself gasping for breath as images of my life with Emmett flashed before my eyes.

Never again would I see his smile. Never again would he hold me close and whisper how much he loved me. Never again would we argue. I would never have to wash another dirty pair of socks.

All the things that seemed unimportant I suddenly wished I could grasp every detail of them. Anything that had bothered me about him before, I longed for now.

What I wouldn't give to have Emmett come home from the gym, sweaty and smelling of death and fish and have him embrace me laughing as I would gag trying to get away.

My breaths came in shorter and shorter gasps, as nurses rushed to sedate me once again.

"Another anxiety attack," I heard one say as I began to slip into unconsciousness. I was reaching into the emptiness for any sign of Emmett, watching as his smile slowly faded from my sight.

"No…Em…don't…go…please," I struggled, as I finally succumbed to the darkness surrounding me.

My sleep was restless; nightmares consuming my thoughts, yet I couldn't wake up.

I watched happy memories of Emmett and I, and then watched him fall slowly, his eyes pleading with me to help. When I tried to run to him, he only grew further away, his arms outstretched; he was reaching for me.

After what felt like an eternity of these torturous dreams, I felt myself being pulled into reality. The instant I was, I wished for those horrid dreams. The murmurs of people around me reminded me that this was not a dream. I would forever have to wake up to this emptiness of being surrounded by anyone but the one my heart truly ached for.

"I think she's waking up," I heard Alice whisper beside me, and I felt my throat constrict at the familiarity.

"Please tell me it was all a dream…Emmetts okay right?" I squeaked out, my throat sticking from the lack of moisture.

I looked into Alice's face, who glanced to Esme for support. It felt as if my heart stopped in my chest as I looked away from them, a lump returning to my throat. Despite the dryness the rest of my body seemed to be experiencing, it didn't stop the torrent of large tears that fell effortlessly from my eyes.

"How?" I asked.

"You don't remember?" Esme said in a concerned manner as she placed her hand on my own.

"How do I live without him?" I continued as if she hadn't spoken at all.

I looked at them both, my eyes pleading for some sort of resolution. Anything that might take this pain away.

Esme tightened her grip on my hand as she shook her head, as tears of her own fell from her eyes.

"I don't know," she whispered, her eyes glazing over seeing what I could only imagine: the birth of her child, his first steps, first laugh, first words. My heart went out to her as I squeezed her hand back in response. She looked down at me, forcing herself from her memories as she tried to smile at me.

"I don't know," she repeated, her voice wavering, "but we'll learn together."

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I seemed to have lost all sense of time as I waited, drifting in and out of a drugged consciousness, for what was to come next. For all I knew I had been here for months now, years even.

Everything seemed the same. As much as the day hurt, the sun would set, and I would awaken to the sun once again. I would curse the daylight. How dare the sun show it's face in the wake of such a tragedy, such a heart wrenching experience.

I loathed the nurses who laughed in the hallways. Who were they to experience laughter, happiness, and joy when everything I had found true joy in was striped from me without consent.

In the darkness I prayed to be taken. I wanted to join Emmett in eternal darkness, at least there I could be happy. At least in my dreams I could hear his voice, see his face, and sometimes it was even as if I could smell him.

Alice came to see me often. I didn't enjoy her company, but I didn't want her to leave either.

"Bella had her baby," she said to me, as I felt another pang of hurt and jealousy.

How dare Bella have her child and be happy when my whole world was turned upside down.

"When?" I asked, even though I knew Alice could tell by my tone I could care less.

"A week ago, he's a beautiful baby boy," she began but I cut her off.

"Alice, I really don't care about that little bastard."

She breathed softly beside me, not thrown at all by my outburst.

"She's in a coma. She has been since the baby was born…Carlisle says there's no way to say if she'll make it out or not," Alice said, and although I knew I shouldn't, I felt relief wash over me.

Good. That bitch couldn't have everything. Couldn't have her happy ending because my Emmett had willingly given his life for her to live.

Alice waited, probably hoping I would say something, but instead I stared at the same stupid crack in the wall that I had grown so accustomed to.

"They say they want to release you this afternoon," she said, and I felt my chest tighten.

Was I ready to go home? To go somewhere Emmett and I had shared memories together?

"Don't worry, they're going to give us things to sedate you if you need it. But besides your anxiety attacks, they have no reason to hold you." Alice informed me.

"It doesn't matter to me," I spat, "nothing matters."

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The ride home was excruciatingly long, and I was surprised yet disappointed to find that we stopped somewhere Emmett and I had never been together. I wouldn't even be able to feel his presence around me. I popped another pill as I felt my chest begin to tighten and my breath quicken.

I walked slowly into the house, it smelled as every Cullen home did. Except that something was missing. I leaned against the doorframe as I tried to regain my strength. Of course the smell of Emmett was what was missing.

I heard the sound of a baby cry from another room in the house causing me to cringe again.

I hated them all, I began to move down the hallway, searching for the room that was to be mine now when a disheveled Edward emerged from a room.

"Oh Rose, I didn't think you'd be home so soon," he said, smiling weakly at me. I could see the anguish in his eyes from losing his brother and the prospect of losing the woman he loved as well.

We stood for a long moment, staring awkwardly at one another not sure what to say.

"Well welcome back," he said, hugging me loosely, "sorry but I gotta get the kiddo some food."

I tried to smile at him as he hurried down the hall, the crying growing louder. I peeked into the room Edward has just come from to see a crib.

I hated what lived in that crib, yet I couldn't stop myself from moving towards the baby. I thought briefly about harming it, but shook that thought from my mind. Even in my pain I couldn't bring myself to hurt a child.

Looking over the railing I saw a cherub face scrunched up in distaste, his gums fully exposed as he wailed for his food, and possibly his missing mother.

"There, there," I said softly as I picked him up. He quieted as I held him close, the smell of a newborn permeating my senses. His eyes were still clouded as he looked up at me, and I felt my heart stop once again.

He was perfect.

"Emmett, I see you've met your auntie Rose," Edward said, as he handed me the bottle.

"Emmett?" I asked, dumbfounded.

"It was Bella's idea. She wanted to name him after the man that allowed him to live." He smiled into the distance as he spoke, "Said she wanted our son to be just as brave as his amazing uncle."

A lump formed in my throat as I looked at this precious gift from new eyes. I would heal from this. Emmett would be with me, but in a different way.

"It's okay," I cooed at baby Emmett, as he suckled eagerly at his bottle, "Auntie Rose will take care of you."

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Emotional enough for you? Should there have been more? Sorry I'm so out of practice! Tried to display as much of my own loss through what I can only imagine is Rose's. Only a few chapters left now!

EPOV next chapter.

Reviews make me smile, and usually want to write more.


	21. Letting Go

Hmm so I said we'd have EPOV, which we will, but I think we may still need a little bit of RPOV. This will be mainly happy, so don't worry ladies and gents. Like I said, we're nearing the end so its fairly smooth sailing from here.

Haha I must dedicate this to cam, for calling me a big mouth bitch and telling me to write. And to labbit for sticking with me through all the ups and the downs…mainly the downs, and still having faith in my writing.

Short chappy, sorry!

SM owns everything, but she can't write angst like me!

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RPOV

I was surprised at how easy it was to love little Emmett. His presence didn't make my pain disappear, but he filled my heart in a way I never thought possible. He was warm, and so tiny. His entire life depending on us.

Thankfully Edward allowed me to help him out, which gave me the sense of being needed by someone. It also gave me a purpose to get up in the mornings. Carlisle took me to the side and told me he thought my attachment to little Emmett could become unhealthy, and I may have problems letting go when Bella awoke.

I understood how he could say that, but I didn't think it would be the case. Either way I wasn't about to stop spending time with the child. It would just throw me even more into depression.

Still at nights I would cry, missing the warmth of Emmett's arms and wishing I could have had his child, instead of living vicariously through Bella's while she was still in her coma.

Edward and I brought Emmett to her as often as we could, talking to her and telling her about the things that were going on with him. Carlisle said she could hear us, but we were still skeptical. She would be so heartbroken when she woke up to find she'd missed so much of her little boys life.

Now today it had officially been a week since I had been released from the hospital. The anxiety medication was helping, but it didn't entirely take the edge off. Those days I would throw myself even more into taking care of Emmett, trying to keep busy from thinking about anything at all.

Sometimes I would take the pill too late, and Carlisle or Esme would find me huddled in a corner of my room, hyperventilating and hysterical repeating Emmett's name.

I felt completely and utterly out of control of my life.

Today Alice was going to take me to the doctors, I stared out of the side window as she chattered on about who knows what. She never asked me direct questions, so I knew she was just trying to keep me distracted. In all honesty I had grown used to it, and preferred it to the silence of my broken mind.

The doctors office seemed very cold, the walls were all plain with the occasional colorful painting, as if that were enough to keep people cheery. The feeling of sickness hung in the air, and I laughed at the fake plant in the corner of the waiting room. Everything in my life seemed like a charade anymore.

It seemed to take a lifetime of staring at the never moving clock before my name was finally called.

-----------------------

We were going to bury Emmett today.

My heart was going to be lowered into the ground in a mahogany casket, and I was going to walk away and never be able to see him again. I felt my chest tighten as we neared the gravesite.

"Breathe," Alice instructed me gently as I felt my thoughts grow hazy.

I could do this. I could be strong. I could get through this burial.

Everyone began saying their final goodbyes as the casket rest above the ground. When it came to my turn I fell to my knees in agony, sobs wracking my body. The casket began to move lower into the earth and I thrust myself forward, reaching out as if he would catch me and take me with him.

"I can't do this without you!" I sobbed, as Edward wrapped his arms around me, holding me from the dark gravel below.

I looked to the heavens, willing the skies to cry along with me.

"I can't do this without you," I repeated more softly this time before barely whispering, "I'm pregnant."

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EPOV

Burying my brother was hell.

Burying my brother while watching the love of his life try to throw herself into his grave was worse.

Holding her in my arms I could almost feel the pain resonating throughout her body. She allowed herself to become dead weight in my arms as she screamed for my brother her tears covering my suit, as my own slid down my face.

"I'm pregnant."

My heart stopped, I couldn't be sure I heard the words right she said them so softly. Nobody around me seemed to have heard it, so I tried to act as though I hadn't either as I helped her to her feet.

She leaned gratefully into me as Alice took her hand and we walked together towards the car we had all come in. I opened the door, trying to coerce Rose into her seat.

"Edward?" She sounded dazed and confused.

"Yes."

"Did that really just happen?"

My throat tightened as tears welled in my eyes. Her big blue eyes looked up at me, hopeful that I could tell her this was all just a bad dream.

"Just sit back and try to relax, it's been a long day," I replied finally as I closed the door, Rose still staring at me.

The ride home was silent except for Rose's comments to herself occasionally in the back seat. I wondered how stable her mental condition was.

Watching as she rubbed her stomach I decided she was just delusional with all the stress, and didn't put much thought into what I had heard at the grave site. Alice had gone with her, surely she would've said something if Rose had found out anything of that magnitude.

Alice stood by Rose as we reached the house. I stood back, watching as Rose crumpled to the ground as sobs wracked her body.

"Emmett, I need you! Your baby needs you!"

I moved to help her up, but Alice stopped me as she kneeled down beside her, rubbing small circles in her back.

"Rose, this baby needs you more than anything. You need to pull yourself together and get inside before you make yourself sick." I was surprised at the stern tone in Alice's voice, as I followed both women into the house.

Esme handed me baby Emmett and I immediately went in to see Bella, eager to tell her of the days events. Although she couldn't respond it somehow comforted me to be able to share everything with her.

She was as beautiful as ever, her dark hair in a tangled mess on the pillow. Her face was pale, her eyes held dark circles around them although she was stuck in a permanent sleep, and her lips seemed to disappear. Still even just seeing her in this condition she managed to take my breath away.

"We buried Emmett today," I began, as I ran my thumb across her cheek.

Tears filled my eyes as I remembered the days events, causing baby Emmett to stir slightly.

"Your son misses you," I told her as I laid him on her chest as I often did.

Even though she couldn't wrap her arms around him, I knew the sound of her heartbeat was comforting to him, as I'm sure the feel of his tiny body was to her. I prayed that one day she opened her eyes, and I would want her son to be the first thing she saw.

I laid down in the bed next to her, holding our son in place as I wrapped my arm around the both of them.

"I miss you I whispered," as my tears flowed freely for everything I had lost and before long I felt myself began to fall asleep.

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I woke up a few hours later feeling disoriented, and I wondered what had caused me to wake up. Looking around the room I saw Alice rocking baby Emmett in the corner, humming softly to him.

"I thought I would give you a break," she said without looking up from Emmett.

"Thanks," I managed to mumble as I tried to rub the sleep from my eyes.

"So it was nice of you to humor Rose earlier," I began.

"What are you talking about?" Alice said looking up.

"About her being pregnant."

"Edward, Rosalie is really pregnant."

There was an awkward pause as I stared at my sister who never broke her gaze from little Emmett.

"How did they not catch that when she first went in?" I asked dumbfounded.

"They weren't looking for it I guess. Technically they should've caught it, but everyone slips up," She said with nonchalance.

"How are you going to tell Carlisle and Esme?" I questioned.

"They already know…Edward, we didn't tell you because you already have so much to deal with. You're taking care of Emmett, and trying to do everything you can for Bella. You're already spreading yourself too thin without worrying about Rose."

"I think it's good for her," I said slowly, my mind having difficulty processing what I was being told as I looked down into Bella's sleeping face, "it gives Rose something to look forward to."

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Does this chapter major suck? Please tell me! Lol. Only a few more left now!


	22. Awakening

Felt mushy tonight, here is the last chapter. The end may seem like the end, but I am still writing an Epilogue. Sorry for the forever to write this. Hope you enjoyed the ride and I hope to see you on some of my others :)

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BPOV

I awoke suddenly, panic rising in my chest. My hands immediately flew to my stomach to feel for the safety of my child, but to my despair I found it empty. Oh no, no no, what had happened?! Had Chris gotten another child of mine? I tried in sheer desperation to find any clue of an explanation in my mind.

"Edward," I tried to croak out, my throat dry and hoarse.

I tried to swallow, but my tongue felt thick and stuck to the roof of my mouth.

"Edward," I attempted again, this time my voice a little louder.

"Edward," I tried one last time, the desperation and panic apparent in my voice.

Suddenly the door flew open and I recoiled in fear, a reflex I had grown accustomed to over the years of hiding from Chris. Before me stood not Chris but the most beautiful man I had ever seen, and his eyes were wide. I wasn't sure, but I could almost swear I saw tears well in them, before he quickly rushed to my side.

"Bella," Edward gushed, his warm hands suddenly on mine as he showered my face in kisses.

"Edward," was all I could manage to get out as my own tears streamed down my face. I had never been more happy to see anyone in my entire life.

"I can't believe you're awake," he managed to say between kisses, "I have to tell Carlisle right away he'll need to check you out. Oh my God Bella I'm so glad you're okay."

"Edward," I said, I felt as though I were stuck on repeat, and I took a deep breath before finishing my sentence, "is the baby alright?"

Edward pulled back from me causing the panic to rise once again in my chest.

"Emmett?" He asked, and I wondered why he would bring his brother up when I was trying to find out about my child.

"No Edward, our baby, not Emmett."

"Bella, I really think Carlisle should check you over first."

Why was he avoiding my question?

I waited patiently as Edward called for Carlisle and it seemed like an eternity as he looked me over. He kept asking me questions, but he would never answer any of mine. He was beginning to frustrate me and by the time he was done I was so exhausted from his badgering I fell asleep in a hurry without any chance to ask about seeing my child. When I awoke I could've sworn I heard the sound of a child crying, but after straining to hear I heard not other sounds of a child. Was my child okay?

The door opened silently as someone slipped into the darkness of my room. I felt warm fingers brush my cheek and I instantly knew it was Edward.

"Emmett," Edward said, and I felt myself grow confused. I could've sworn I had only heard one person walk into the room.

"Mommy's awake," Edward continued, as I heard a soft cooing noise come from somewhere in the darkness.

That couldn't be my child could it? My heart swelled with happiness as I listened to Edward tell baby Emmett how they would have to be patient with me while I recovered.

"We can visit mommy in her sleep though, just like always," I heard him promised, as I felt slight pressure on my chest.

The tiny body wiggled on me as Edward lay down next to the two of us, holding Emmett up. I wondered how often Edward had performed this ritual as I listened to the tiny breathing slow and soon I could tell that my son was asleep. I fought to keep from moving, but sound found my hand reaching up and stroking the tiny hand pressed softly against my chest. His other hand slowly moved above my heart as I listened to a soft sucking noise. My son was sucking his thumb on my chest as he slept.

I had never felt more peaceful than at that moment. Tears of happiness filled my eyes, my fingers continuing to caress the soft skin. I bit my tongue to keep from talking to him as my hand moved to the tiny head. I could feel his smooth hair and my hand traveled down his back where my fingers collided with Edwards.

Suddenly I panicked pulling my hand back to my side, fearing that Edward would take little Emmett away from me after I had barely just met him.

"Bella," Edwards voice was soft, "It's okay. Meet your son."

My breath caught in my throat as my hand slowly moved back up the sleeping body. I had a son. Nobody had taken him from me. He was here, and he was mine to keep forever.

"Think you can keep him steady?" Edward asked, and I shook my head before realizing he

wouldn't be able to see me in the dark.

"Yes," I squeaked out timidly as I felt Edwards hand slid from our child's chest.

I heard a soft click and suddenly the entire room was illuminated with light. I blinked a few times, waiting for my eyes to adjust as my gaze traveled down my chest to the sleeping baby. His cheeks seemed chubby as he sucked fervently on his thumb. His hair was dark like mine, but his nose looked just like Edwards. His fingers were tiny and I couldn't stop my hand from brushing against his little fist. His hands flexed out as his thumb was released from his mouth and his tiny fingers slowly wrapped around mine, like he never wanted to let me go. His lips were pouted as he moved his head slightly before resettling.

That was all I could see of him from my position but it was enough, no it was more than enough. He was perfect in every aspect of the word, and I relished in his new baby smell.

"He's beautiful isn't he?" Edward asked, as he laid himself back down next to his, he laid on his side staring at my face with a look of love and adoration.

"I've never seen anything more amazing in my life," I admitted.

"He's missed you," Edward said quietly, stroking the sleeping babies head.

"How can you tell?" I asked him, there's no way he could know something like that.

"There were nights he would just cry, and I couldn't figure out why. Carlisle said he could have colic, meaning he just cries, but I knew better. Everyone thought I was nuts, but I would be in here talking to you all the time. And one night I put him on your chest like this, and he was silent in an instant." Edward said, growing silent.

"Why?" I asked, my mind was swirling with everything going on at once.

"Carlisle said it's because he recognizes your heartbeat." Edward said in a matter of fact tone as he looked across at me love filling his eyes.

"Can't say I wasn't jealous of him a few times either. I wish I could just rest my head on your chest and suddenly feel okay."

We were silent for a moment, reveling in the miracle we had created, when suddenly a question popped in my mind.

"Why Emmett?" I asked quietly, trying to keep from disturbing my son.

"Bella, Emmett is dead," Edward began and I than listened as Edward recapped the last couple of months to me. I couldn't believe all we had both gone through to get to this most perfect place in our life.

* * *

**Five months Later**

Everyone scurried around the house in a hurry, trying to grab everything they would need.

"Edward, do you have Emmetts stuff?" I asked frantically as I ran to the front door.

"Of course I do," he yelled back in a hurried voice.

"ARGH you are all taking forever, can we please get me to the hospital before Carlisle has

to deliver this baby right here in the car?!" Rosalie yelled at us from the car.

Edward and I both looked at one another before breaking down in laughter.

"I don't see what's so funny! There's a baby on the way, lets move people!" Rose barked

as Alice tried to push us towards the car.

"Come on," she said quietly, "lets get this over with so she'll stop bossing me around!"

That made Edward and I laugh even harder as we both climbed into the car. I couldn't remember when I had ever felt this free.

Once Rosalie was checked into the hospital we were stuck in the waiting room. Little Emmett was growing fussy at being stuck in one place for such a long period of time and Edward agreed to take him for a walk around and to get himself a cup of coffee.

I sat in the hard plastic chair and looked up to the tv mounted on the wall. Some stupid cooking show was on, and I found myself smiling. I was stuck, waiting for my sister in law to have my niece, while my son and my husband walked around, and I was here watching some mundane cooking show. Life couldn't be any better at this moment.

It had been a long road after waking up from the coma. I dealt with a lot of anger and guilt towards myself for Emmett's death. Rose and I went to therapy sessions together to help ourselves deal with our trauma's. At first I thought Rose would never be able to forgive me. Over time it actually brought us closer together than ever. She seemed more like a sister to me than anything, and I loved just spending time with her.

Often times she would tell me stories about Emmett. How they had met, how he had proposed. Little things that she wanted to remember forever that she was afraid to forget. During our talks often times I would record her. I told her it was so she would never forget, and also so their little girl could hear these stories from her mom.

Once we had been cleaning out some old boxes when Rose found one full of old tapes from when Emmett had been a child to recordings during family events. I sat through every tear filled night with Rose as we watched every last minute of those tapes. I promised her we would have them converted to dvd as soon as we could.

The screen suddenly switched to a news cast and Chris's face flashed across the screen. I knew they were just covering the footage from his trial, but I often found myself going rigid in fear during times like this. Today however his face caused me no fear. I knew I was in control now. I had found my forgiveness in Edward and in baby Emmett. Never again would I have to worry over that man, or anyone else who had inflicted pain to me in my life.

"Bella," Esme said, breaking me from thought as her head poked out from the swinging doors separating the waiting room from the delivery rooms.

"Hm," I said confused, was everything alright?

"Rose wants you in there with her honey, said she doesn't want anyone else."

I smiled to myself as I rose from the chair and walked briskly to Rose's side. She was screaming as I walked in, her head turned to me her face in anguish.

"Bells, I don't think I can do this." She said, the sweat beading on her forehead.

"Don't be silly," I said, "this is what you've been waiting for Rose! Come on, do it for you. Do it for Emmett. Do it for little Emily!" I urged as the doctor told her to push.I watched as she screamed, a head peaked out at me.

"Rose honey you're almost there, come on baby you can do it!" I was nearly shouting at her in excitement.

With one final push the beautiful baby girl was out as she cried for her mother.

"Bells," Rose said groggy, "Who does she look like?"

"Emmett," I said with honesty, as the cleaned baby was finally placed on her chest.

Tears of happiness streamed down both of our faces as we gazed down at the perfect little baby girl.

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Kind of a short chapter but come on you all know I don't do fluff well.

Now although all of the characters were not alive for the end, was it worth it? Did I deliver okay on my HEA?

Thanks to Labbit for getting me through so many hard nights. Thanks to Cam for always making me laugh when I feel too angsty and for telling me I will never feel like I've accomplished anything if I don't finish this first. Thanks to all the girls at rehab for all the support. Thank you to every single one of my readers for sticking with me through this long process.

Remember epilogue still to come. If you're looking for something new to read now and havent read Sleepers Awake by Feisty Y. Beden I highly recommend you do so. It is an amazing story.


	23. Ten Years Later

**Edited: thank you to the reader who informed me of my mistake, i appreciate it so much! **

Here we come to the real end of the road. I won't get all nostalgic and whatnot for you. Once again this is pretty short but I think it will give everyone, including Bella, the closure that is needed.

SM still owns

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Ten Years Later

BPOV

"Mom the mails here!" my son yelled at me as he threw the pieces of mail onto the kitchen counter.

"Thank's sweetie, where's your sister?" I asked, as I thumbed through the different envelopes.

"She's playing down the street with Emily," he said before grabbing something from the fridge and bounding upstairs.

I shook my head, my life was a whirlwind and I loved every moment of it. After Emily was born the tiny house we had all shared seemed even smaller. We figured since Chris and Renee were finally behind bars we could come out of hiding.

We had moved to a quaint little house in a small town of Forks, Washington. Esme found the place very enduring and it's constant state of green made her glow with happiness. Rose and I couldn't stand the idea of us being too far away and she soon moved to the house just down the street.

Life settled down considerably after that. Emily and Emmett were often subjected to play dates together while Rose and I talked over our problems. I began to take pictures for the town; weddings, baby showers, basically anything people wanted photographed I was there. Rose opened her own restaurant and soon was the talk of the town with her delicious meals. Edward continued to run his job through telephone and the internet. Sometimes he would have to take a business trip but they were few and far between.

Alice and Jasper moved to Forks as well, and Alice was soon the town designer. She did everything from interior decorating to wedding planning, and anything inbetween. Alice and Jasper had recently had their first child, little Patton, named after General Patton of course. Jasper had wanted to call him Custard after Colonel Custard, but Alice refused to let him. She said that no child of hers would be named after such a disgusting yellow color.

Edward and I too had added another member to our family, little Angela Cullen. She was my little Jelly bean now, and I loved to tell her stories of her aunt Angela. She was 8 now, and recently told me that while she liked the stories, it was no longer cool for her to hear bedtime stories.

I laughed to myself at the reminder of how quickly my children were growing up as I pulled a specific envelope out of the pile. I ran my fingers lightly over the edges. I knew what it was but I wasn't quite ready to open it yet.

"Hey honey, what's that?" Edward asked as he walked into the kitchen planting a loving kiss on my forehead.

"Oh nothing important, hey I think I'm gonna go visit Angela's grave, do you mind watching the kids?"

"Of course no, you sure everything's alright?"

"Positive," I promised as I grabbed my keys and headed out the door.

It was a twenty minute drive to where Edward and I had finally found a place to put Angela's headstone. I turned the music on softly as I laid the envelope in the seat right next to mine and began to drive towards my sister.

I thought through everything we had been through. Although Chris had appeared dead after Rose shot him, he was barely alive, and fought for his life in the intensive care for months. We were disappointed to say the least, and though he was locked up we always wished more justice could be done for all he had done to me and our family. Despite all Renee had done she had only received life in jail, but Chris was sentenced to death. Of course we were relieved to hear that, but his death had been postponed many times and I was beginning to wonder if it would ever happen.

Thankfully Misty was found and now lived under an assumed name somewhere. I wasn't allowed to know where I was in case one of Chris's lackys found me and tried to find her as well. I missed her but was at least thankful that she was safe now. The authorities had allowed us to speak before she was sent away, and we said our teary goodbyes.

I pulled up to the grave site in no time and quickly stepped out of the car, sure to grab the envelope as well.

"Jellie, it's here," I whispered as I sat on the grass next to her headstone.

I ran my fingers over her name as always, saying my hello to her. I sat there for a long time, a million thoughts running through my head as I toyed with the paper on the envelope.

"This enveloped holds a lot of answers to things for me," I said, knowing my sister could hear me.

I sat staring at the typed up address labels. Did the person printing these labels know how much meaning each letter beneath them would hold? This was the closure I had been waiting for for a long time.

I don't know how long I sat there, but I suddenly realized there was someone else there with me. I looked up to find Rose standing a few feet behind me.

"I heard you were here," she said plainly, as though she were meeting me for coffee.

"I got it in the mail today," I told her, and she nodded her head as though she too had received the same envelope as I had.

"Do you want me here when you open it?" she asked, one again ready to be my support system.

"You know what, I don't want to open it," I said, smiling as I stood from the ground brushing the grass from my clothes, "it doesn't even matter to me."

I rested the enveloped containing Chris's death date against my sisters headstone as I walked away. He was already dead to me, and my new life had already begun.

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If you still want to read more from me I have just posted a new story name Sons of Silence. If it sounds interesting to you, check it out!

Thanks to all of the girls at Rehab for your constant support. Thank you to all of you amazing and dedicated and loving readers. You really are the best. Thank you to everyone who supported me; Cam, Labbit, my Bity, and so so so many more. Every reviewer you are some of the best people out there and I am humbled by you're amazingness.


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